


consequences

by fuckinshiiitmydude



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Squip, Hook-Up, M/M, Teacher-Parent Relationship, first fic pls forgive me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-02-27 18:37:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 45,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13254267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckinshiiitmydude/pseuds/fuckinshiiitmydude
Summary: Teacher Parent AU that nobody asked forJeremy Heere never thought a random bar hook up would be any more than a, well, hookup. But when a familiar face shows up as the parent of one of his new students, he realized he wouldn't be able to kick that sexual encounter under the rug.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello, here is my contribution (albeit shitty) to this fandom
> 
> very sorry in advance; very first fic ever

“You need a drink,” stated Brooke matter-of-factly. 

Jeremy glanced up from the plastic, half blank name tags covering his desk. “Am I that obvious?” he retorted in a deadpan. He sighed, moving his tired hands from his work and leaning back in his chair. 

With only two days until the first day of school, Jeremy was in the bowels of one of his busiest times of the year. He had estimated a full work week would be enough to get his classroom to tip-top shape for his 24 new first graders, but he was sorely mistaken. Jeremy glanced up at the clock; make that a week and one day. 

Brooke picked at the drying glue on one of Jeremy’s projects. His classroom theme this year was vintage video games; although he knew most of kids wouldn’t be familiar with the specifics, he hoped the techy theme would get them somewhat interested. “You’ve been cooped up in here literally all day. And you’ve said no to getting lunch with me for two days in a row! You need to cool off,” she concluded, fidgeting in the tiny children’s chair she sat in.

“But the kids will be here in two days and-” Jeremy started to protest.

“Your room looks fine, Jeremy!” Brooke cut him off. “More than fine, actually. A lot more detail than mine. All you have left is writing out their names on their desks. You can finish it tomorrow,” The blonde stood up and picked up Jeremy’s book bag next to him. “Now let’s go, I need some alcohol in me before I go crazy smelling all of these Crayola markers,” Brooke smiled mischievously, taking Jeremy’s clanking keys out of his bag and walking slowly backwards towards the exit.

“Brooke! Come back!” Jeremy groaned, stretching out his long legs before giving up his short defense against his friend. She did have a good point; he tended to get overwhelmed too easily, and his classroom did look pretty cool. Not to mention he was exhausted and a drink sounded amazing. He stood up and begrudgingly followed Brooke towards the door.

“See? I knew you’d crack. Now let’s go get drunk.”

_______________________________________________________________

Jeremy nursed his beer, content with leaning back against the booth and letting his friends drive the conversation. He was accompanied by Brooke and a few other teachers from school, Rich and Christine. They had arrived at the bar about a half hour prior, all four starting to feel the familiar warmth in their stomachs as they downed the alcoholic drinks. 

“-and that was how I almost royally fucked up in front of the hottest guy I have ever seen. Almost,” Rich concluded his story about one of his many romantic escapades with a flourish, haphazardly bowing as much as he could in his seat. 

“I mean, we can’t exactly qualify that as a success if you still didn’t get his number,” Christine countered next to him with a giggle and raised her shoulders in doubt.

Jeremy and Brooke looked back at their charismatic friend for his answer from across the booth. “Yeah, but I did get a good fuck out of it so I think I can compromise,” Rich retaliated with a smirk and finishing off his drink. 

The group laughed and fell back into normal conversation. Jeremy took another swing of his drink. He wanted to soak in this adult kind of socialization before he would be swamped with childlike interactions in a few short days. He loved teaching, but it was nice to have a change of tone and be able to enjoy things he sometimes forgot other twenty-seven year olds did, like go to bars with their friends and talk about their sexual shenanigans. Or in his case, let Rich babble on about his comedic hijinks. 

“I still don’t understand how you get so many guys all the time,” Brooke said. “It’s honestly quite impressive.”

“I can’t help my irrististible charm and seductive charisma,” Rich joked with a shrug. “Although I’m definitely down to bestow my wise words of wisdom if any of you prudes would like to get laid within the next century.”

“I think I’ll do just fine on my own,” Christine chuckled with a roll of her eyes. “But I’m sure Jeremy would appreciate some tips,” she sang-song, gesturing towards the man across from her with her glass. 

“What?! I am more than fine, thank you,” Jeremy stuttered, sitting up and adjusting his sweater, avoiding eye contact.

“If fine means you’re content to go on sexually frustrated for another six months,” Brooke joked light heartedly.

“Seriously bro, when was the last time you got laid?” Rich asked.

Jeremy could feel his face begin to flush red. “I-I..uh...like...um..,” he struggled to get words out while racking the back of his brain for his memory. It really had been a while for him. 

Rich cackled and placed his hands on the table. “See? You can’t even remember. Dude, let me help you, please. I can’t associate myself with you if you don’t lose some of that pent up tension vibe you’ve been giving off lately.”  
“I’m not pent up!” Jeremy protested shakily. “I’ve been busy! In case you all forgot we all have a brand new school year starting on Monday, which should take priority over your weird interest in my sex life.”

“Or lack there of,” Brooke murmured with a smirk.

“This is all coming from a place of love,” Christine reached her hand over the table to pat Jeremy’s lovingly.

“And also we’re tired of boring, sad Jeremy,” Rich stated bluntly. “Get some dick already, dude.”

“Argh!” Jeremy interjected with a groan. “Can we please change the subject?” He said, placing his head in his hands to hide his blush. As much as he hated talking about himself, especially his problem areas, he knew his coworkers were right. He had been a little...frustrated lately. He had hoped his job would help distract him, but he knew he had to face the facts. He was a single twenty-seven year old, and single twenty-seven year olds had sex. Jeremy knew deep down that the reason for his dry spell was tendency to be shy around new interests, never really going after what he wanted. The idea of getting close to someone and having the possibility of rejection also sent a chill down his spine and a scowl on his face. He could take a little sexual frustration, but the pressing idea not being enough for someone that was always a reminder in the back of his head always held him back. 

“Shots?” Brooke asked, coming to Jeremy’s rescue. 

“As long as you’re buying!” Rich responded.

Jeremy sighed in relief, grateful for the change in conversation and the promise of more liquor. Brooke stood up to go get the drinks, and Christine and Rich quickly turned to a friendly argument over if whiskey or vodka was the superior alcohol. Jeremy loved his friends, but he needed a lot more drinks before he would be comfortable discussing his sex life.

His was stopped out of his daydreaming by glasses clinking on the table. He gratefully grabbed one of the four small glasses, raising it to cheer his friends.   
“To the new school year!” Brooke toasted.  
“And to good dick!” Rich added.  
Jeremy rolled his eyes before letting the liquid slide down his throat bitingly. 

“Why was this so much easier in college?” Jeremy grimaced, sipping his beer to chase the bitter spirit. 

“It wasn’t,” Christine said, shaking her head. 

They were interrupted from their celebrating by the waitress coming over with a single glass. “Oh, we didn’t order anything else,” Brooke began to explain to the bartender.

“I know. That fellow over there,” she gestured towards a dark haired man sitting alone on one of the bar stools, “requested you receive it.” 

“Well don’t mind if I do,” Rich said smugly, about to grab the drink before he was interrupted. 

“Actually, he bought it for you,” the waitress moved the booze from Rich’s impatient hands and slid it towards the back of the booth. 

Jeremy looked up to see the mysterious drink directly in front of him. “Oh..I-uh...I think he might be mistaken,” he stuttered, feeling his face go red, waving his hands in protest. He glanced over at the cryptic stranger to make direct eye contact. Jeremy felt his face go an impossible shade darker. From his spot in his booth, he could see the tan male was good looking. Dressed in a dark suit, he too looked like he had just gotten off of work. He had dark features that were masked by a pair of black, thick rimmed glasses. He shot a closed mouth grin at the blushing recipient. 

“Unless there’s another skinny brunette in a sweater at this table, then this belongs to you,” the waitress retorted and left the table. 

“Biiiitch,” Rich exclaimed, rubbing his hands together in a villainous tone. “Looks like someone’s got a little admirer!”

Jeremy flushed even further. This kind of stuff never happened to him. He glanced back over at the stranger, who was fiddling with his own drink and staring down at the bar counter. 

The girls began to squeal. “Jeremy!” 

“What?” Jeremy stuttered.

“What are you doing just sitting here? Go over there already!” Rich encouraged along with little words of support from Christine and Brooke.

Perhaps it was the growing amounts of alcohol churning through his system, or the peer pressure from his friends, or maybe Jeremy was letting his dick talk, but he maneuvered his way outside the booth and began walking towards the back corner of the bar, full drink in one shaky hand. 

“Hi,” Jeremy spoke bluntly, trying not to stutter, standing directly in front of the dark haired man.

It seemed like the man couldn’t turn his body around from facing the bar slower. Jeremy gulped and felt his face go red. This was such a bad idea, why did he let Brooke drag him to-

“Hi,” the man echoed, a wide grin spread on his face. He he had nice teeth, Jeremy noted. “I see you got your refreshment,” he eyed Jeremy’s fluctuant hand.

“Y-yeah,” Jeremy replied, looking anywhere but the handsome stranger. 

“Do you want to sit down?” He asked with a chuckle, gesturing to the seat adjacent to his own.

Jeremy nodded and obeyed. He felt embarrassed. Why was he being so awkward? It’s just a person (albeit insanely gorgeous). He talks to people all the time. This shouldn’t be that difficult. 

“I’m Michael,” the stranger said, interrupting Jeremy out of his reverie. He held out a tan hand. Jeremy took it. Michael’s hand was warm and strong. 

“Jeremy,” he replied, smiling and finally getting the courage to look him in the eyes. “I’m gonna be honest, this is definitely the first time this has happened to me,” Jeremy said with a nervous chuckle, taking a sip of the free drink. “At first I thought you were giving it to my friend.”

Michael leaned in closer, facing his body towards Jeremy. “Well trust me, I meant it for you,” he replied warmly, his brown eyes glistening into Jeremy’s tremorous ones. “I’m glad they let me borrow you for a little bit, though.”

Trust me, they would’ve given me over for sacrifice if they could’ve, Jeremy thought. He looked behind him at his staring friends. Rich mimicked shooting a basketball into a hoop, while the girls gave him thumbs up. “Yeah, I’m sure they’re so heartbroken to miss me,” Jeremy deadpanned, looking back at Michael. 

“What brought you guys out here tonight? Celebrating?” Michael asked, ignoring the group’s embarrassing antics for Jeremy’s sake. 

Another sip. “It’s just been a long few weeks at work,” Jeremy said. “I’m a teacher; we’re getting ready for the new year and everything.”

“Wow, you work with kids? That’s admirable,” Michael replied, and Jeremy tried not to melt under the compliment. “And to think I just work a boring office job.”

“What do you do?”

“I work for Pepsi. Marketing,” Michael replied with a roll of his eyes. “I know, try not to bombard me with all your questions on how intriguing it is.”

“Wait. Did you happen to have anything to do with that new comeback of Crystal Pepsi? Because that was amazing,” Jeremy grinned.

“Actually, yeah,” Michael shared a smile. 

“What? No way!” Jeremy exclaimed. “You definitely should’ve led with that.”

Michael let out a real, hearty laugh. Jeremy wanted to hear that on repeat forever. “Duly noted. Any other pointers you wanna give me?”

“Maybe loosen up your tie a little, you look like a nerd,” Jeremy felt bold, and took his hands away from fiddling with his sweater and brought them up to Michael’s broad chest, unfastening the fabric. “Maybe unbuttoning a few of these as well,” he continued, exemplifying his words with actions. He wasn’t sure if the growing warmness in his stomach was from alcohol or something else entirely. He moved back a little to cool himself off. “Much better.”

The man laughed. “Good enough to keep you interested?” he asked, voice getting lower, letting his dark eyes settle on Jeremy’s.

Jeremy felt himself get even hotter. They were barely flirting; why was he getting so flustered? “Trust me, if I wasn’t interested, I would’ve taken the free drink and left.” He gulped down the rest of his drink, feeling emboldened. “You’re like, one of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen.”

“Have you looked in the mirror?” Michael retorted. “Fuck. The second I saw you walk through that door I couldn’t stop staring at you.”

Holy shit. Jeremy broke eye contact to flush even further. Was this actually happening? What the fuck? 

If it was really a dream, he sure as hell wasn’t gonna waste it.

“Can I give you one more pointer?” Jeremy asked, leaning in closer. Michael’s face was even more gorgeous zoomed in. Clear skin, full lips, big eyes. He gave a silent praise to Brooke for dragging him out. This was a hell of a lot better than cutting out paper shapes. “You should definitely kiss me right about now.”

Jeremy had barely let the words escape his lips when that warm sturdy hand was on his cheek and that fantastic mouth was on his. The paler man placed a hand through Michael’s thick hair, opening his mouth to deepen the kiss. He was met with a groan from his companion, who in turn slipped his tongue into Jeremy’s mouth. Jeremy could already feel his lower region responding. Fuck, it’s just a kiss, he thought to himself. It really had been a while for him.

Michael was busy sucking on Jeremy’s bottom lip during his internal rant, biting softly to bring him back to reality. “Fuck,” Jeremy pulled away with a breathy sigh, keeping his hands at the nape of Michael’s neck. 

“How’s that?” Michael smirked, eyes blown with lust, even evident behind his dark rimmed glasses. 

Jeremy responded by pulling him again. He never wanted to stop kissing this stranger. His lips were insanely soft, and Jeremy melted into his movements. It quickly transformed back into deep kisses, tongues dancing and exploring. Jeremy couldn’t help but let out a soft whimper when Michael pulled back to breathe.

“Yeah, you definitely don’t need any help in that department,” Jeremy flushed, pulling his hands away. He glanced down and adjusted his pants to hide the embarrassingly fast arousal kicking in gear. 

“Would you...do you wanna maybe take this somewhere else?” Michael asked slowly, rubbing the nape of his neck where Jeremy’s hands were moments ago. 

Fuck. Did he ever. 

_____________________________________

Moments later, Jeremy found himself in the shitty bar bathroom, pressed against the wall of the furthest stall. His hands were back in those dark locks. It was quickly becoming one of his favorite things to touch. His lips were spread open in an ‘o’ shape, panting as his head hit the cool tile wall. Michael peppered kisses along his jawline, making his way down his neck, stopping to suck hard on places where Jeremy whimpered. His broad torso was pressed fully against Jeremy’s smaller frame.

“Shit, I didn’t even ask. Fuck, is it okay if I mark you?” Michael pulled away breathlessly. Jeremy opened his eyes, looking into Michael’s half lidded ones. 

“Fuck yes,” Jeremy shut him up with another kiss. At this point, Michael could ask him to murder and he’d reply with an enthusiastic yes. Kissing Michael was also quickly becoming another one of his favorite things. He couldn’t help but grind his hips into Michael’s when the taller one touched down his chest while simultaneously sucking on his tongue. 

Michael’s wonderful hands made it down to Jeremy’s ass, silently asking permission to lift him up with a hard squeeze. Jeremy moaned at his touch and quickly moved his legs around his waist. With his movement, their groins made contact. Jeremy wasn’t sure who pulled out of their kiss, but the combination of the feel of Michael’s cock against his own and Michael’s mouth letting out a gorgeous moan made his own dick twitch. 

Michael’s mouth made its way back onto Jeremy’s long neck, licking over the harsh bites he littered along the pale canvas. Jeremy let out a flustered mix of a sigh and a whimper, his mind barely sharp enough to start unbuttoning the rest of Michael’s white button down. He panted as he finally was able to feel that gloriously tan chest, running his thumbs over his nipples teasingly. 

Michael thrusted unrhythmically at Jeremy’s touch, stopping his abuse on Jeremy’s collarbone and let out a shaky breath, “Fuck. I can’t believe this is happening right now,” he whispered with an open grin. 

At this point, the combination of alcohol and lust had completely taken over Jeremy’s mind. The only thing he was sure of was the fantastic feeling of Michael’s warm and encompassing body against his own. He never wanted Michael to stop touching him. All he knew was this was the best he’d felt in such a fucking long time. 

“Please, touch me. Michael, please,” Jeremy gasped out, his cock already rock hard and desperate for friction. He bucked up, needing more. 

Michael moved one of his hands from Jeremy’s ass to the front of his pants, and with Jeremy’s help, got them undone and pulled down to his mid thigh. He grazed over the wet spot in Jeremy’s boxers, and the smaller man let out a desperate moan at the touch. “You’re so hard already. So fucking hot, Jeremy,” Michael growled. Jeremy mewled as Michael ran his knuckles over his dick through the thin fabric before ripping down his boxers swiftly and taking his leaking cock into his hand. 

“Shit, Michael,” Jeremy gasped. Said man curled his fingers around Jeremy’s dick, thumb running over the head and taking the precome that had gathered to spread it down to the base. His hand made slow movements, working up and down, encouraged by Jeremy’s progressively louder noises. He curled his fist tighter as he went up towards the head, causing a delicious pressure to start building in Jeremy’s stomach. His other hand stayed on his ass, kneading in just the right way, fingers teasing over his hole. Jeremy’s chest heaved as Michael continued, getting overwhelmed with the amount of feeling, trying to cover up his mouth was a hand, biting on a knuckle. He could feel Michael’s own hard on against his thigh, only making him inch closer to his climax.

“You look so pretty for me. Fuck, Jeremy, you’re so hot like this,” Michael praised, admiring the view of a flushed Jeremy, eyes closed in pleasure, red, swollen lips open in a silent plea for more. Jeremy could only bite his hand harder hearing his own name come out of Michael’s mouth. He dragged him closer to pull him in to an open mouthed kiss as that wonderfully talented hand continued to work his dick. 

They continued in this improvised, pleasurable dance for a while, until Jeremy could feel that familiar heat start to overflow in his stomach. “Michael, I’m so close..just-fuck, please,” he garbled out, frantically thrusting into Michael’s hand, his cock leaking steadily now. 

Michael responded by impossibly speeding up his movements until Jeremy let out a loud gasp, spilling onto his hand and hips jerking unrhythmically. His moan was swallowed by another talented kiss. 

Once the aftershocks started to melt away, Jeremy pulled away, laying his head on Michael’s strong shoulder. He felt the darker man clean him up with a paper towel while he struggled to regain his breathing. 

“Good?” Michael asked, tossing the used tissue into the trash while Jeremy pulled his boxers and pants back on. 

Jeremy nodded furiously, embarrassment creeping in now that his arousal was lowered. “Very, very good,” he answered with a breathy grin. He couldn’t help but pull Michael into another kiss. “Now let me repay the favor,” he whispered against his lips, kissing down his chest and kneeling down to reach his belt buckle. 

“Do you have a condom?” Jeremy asked, and was given Michael pulling out his wallet and shakily handing a foiled packet over. The brunette unwrapped it, throwing the wrapping somewhere on the ground before slipping it onto the hard on in front of him.

This time, it was Michael who sighed, hands massaging Jeremy’s scalp tenderly as he worked his pants and underwear down his legs. Jeremy could feel his spent cock twitch at the sight of Michael’s, which bounced onto his stomach. It was slightly thicker than Jeremy’s, causing the thinner’s mouth to salivate at the sight. As much as he enjoyed the view, he needed to feel that weight in his mouth now. 

Michael gasped softly when Jeremy gave a tentative lick at the underside while his hands went to cup and massage his balls slowly. He wrapped his mouth around the head and began to slowly bob his head, taking in more and more of Michael’s cock at a torturously slow pace. “Fuck, Jeremy, please. Faster,” Michael whispered in pants. 

Jeremy obeyed, eyes going half lidded, relishing the feeling of his mouth being stretched by Michael’s dick. He could tell Michael was being tense, barely moving through gritted teeth. “You can move, Michael. I’m not gonna break,” Jeremy’s voice was already hoarse. He just really wanted to feel his cock on his throat. 

“Fuck,” Michael cursed, guiding Jeremy with his hands in his hair, slowly starting to thrust into Jeremy’s all too willing mouth. Jeremy continued to swallow and moan around him, only speeding up his movements until he reached the dark thatch of hair on Michael’s stomach. “Holy fuck, Jeremy.”

Jeremy hummed and continued to suck and lick obscenely, focusing on not choking when he felt the head hit the back of his throat. His scalp was beginning to feel the effects of Michael’s incessant tugging, but that only encouraged him to keep pleasuring the man above him even more.

“‘M close,” Michael warned, his movements becoming ragged and uneven. Jeremy only encouraged him with a soothing thumb working his hip and another hard suck on his head. Michael gasped softly, shooting into the back of Jeremy’s throat. 

Pulling his member out gently, Jeremy took off the condom and tied it up, throwing it into the trash can next to him. He made his way back up towards his favorite part of Michael’s body; his lips. He kissed them chastely. “Good?” he teased with a smirk, echoing Michael’s former statement.  
“Very, very good,” Michael responded with a light chuckle and pulled him in for another deep kiss. 

Suddenly, Jeremy felt the weight of this entire situation fall on his brain. He’d just had sex with a stranger. In a dingy bar bathroom, no less, with his friends probably wondering where the hell he’d disappeared to. Everything fell down to a crashing halt as Jeremy began to realize the extent of his actions, sobering up quickly. He barely even knew this guy’s name and just sucked his dick. This was definitely not something he did. 

“Are you okay?” Michael asked, eyebrows furrowing in concern after seeing Jeremy’s face begin to whiten. 

“I think I need t-to..uh..go. Yeah. M-my friends are probably worried about me,” he stuttered out, body stepping away from the warmth of Michael’s. “Thanks, though. For th-the handjob,” he added, trying to push down the feeling of wanting to vomit. 

“Jeremy, wait-” Michael pleaded, grabbing his arm. “Did I do something? I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or-”

Jeremy wanted to cry at Michael’s worried expression. Fuck, why couldn’t he have done the normal thing and gone out on a date with this guy? He probably thought Jeremy was just a quick, easy fuck. He’d never want to see Jeremy again outside of this kind of context. God, he was really spiraling. One dry spell led him to freaking out over one sexual encounter.

“No! It’s fine,really, I just need to go,” Jeremy rushed, pulling out of Michael’s grasp and quickly walking out of the bathroom. He really wasn’t made for quick, random hook-ups. 

Jeremy let his head hang as he found his friends, clearly drunk as they shouted at his return. 

“Jeremy, my man! Finally getting some!” Rich slurred, standing up to throw an arm around his skinny friend. “I bet his cock was killer.”

Jeremy rolled his eyes, carrying his friend towards the door. “Alright buddy, it’s late, let’s get you home.”

“That's not an answer, Jeremyyyy,” Brooke followed with Christine with linked arms. 

“Even if I gave you guys any details you’re all too drunk to remember,” Jeremy deadpanned, pulling out his phone to call them an Uber. He knew even he wasn’t capable of driving yet. He sat down on the curb with his friends, trying to ignore their pleas for details while waiting for their ride home.  
________________________________________________

Jeremy stood in the mirror, adjusting his collar for the millionth time. He groaned. 

It was the first day of school, and not even his highest collar could hide the dark purple marks on his neck, a constant reminder of his escapade two nights prior. He blushed, trying to push that night of his mind. It had been a...distracting few days, to say the least, and now he was facing another consequence to his spontaneity. He left his reflection to put on a turtleneck. 

What a way to start the year.

________________________________________________

“Wll, Thomas, I am very excited to have you in my class. I hope you’re excited for first grade!” Jeremy kneeled, holding out his hand for a high five. The small, blonde child smiled, slapped Jeremy’s hand and left to search for his name on an empty desk. 

Jeremy stood up and looked out at his classroom. Only yesterday was it still empty, and now it was bustling with excitable and fidgeting six year olds, looking around at the displays and their desks, familiarizing themselves with their new home-away-from-home for the next nine months. He really did love the beginning of the year; it always signified a fresh start and a whole new batch of children he would grow to love and care for. 

“We were so excited when we found out Thomas got you as a teacher,” said boy’s mom said to Jeremy. “We’ve only heard great reviews.”

“Aw, well thank you,” Jeremy answered politely, placing his hands in his pockets. It was pretty customary for a least a quarter of the parents to show up on the first day, and Jeremy had gotten used to the same routine of welcoming his students, and reassuring the parents of the year ahead. “I’m really stoked about what this year has in store and to get to know Thomas more, too,” he smiled, shaking the woman’s hand as she gave a smile before leaving the classroom.

Jeremy scanned the room once more, noticing one more empty seat. As if on cue, a bouncing little girl entered the classroom, holding onto her father’s hand. Jeremy smiled warmly and went to introduce himself. 

“Hi there! I’m Mr. Heere,” Jeremy kneeled and shook the little girls hand. “What’s your name?”

“Emmy!” the girl exclaimed, her brunette pigtails bouncing in excitement. 

“It’s very nice to meet you, Miss Emmy,” Jeremy responded with a smile. “Now see that seat right over there?” he pointed. “That’s all for you! Why don’t you go check it out?” 

Emmy responded by skipping over to the destination. Jeremy once again got up, grateful to be done with introductions. He went to smile as he made eye contact with Emmy’s father, only to have the color drain from his face immediately. He recognized those chocolate eyes anywhere, even hidden behind glasses.

“Michael?!”


	2. chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you asked, i deliver
> 
> (aka my love language is words of affirmation and yalls kind comments made me write this)

“Michael?”

Jeremy felt his heart drop to his feet. This had to have been a dream. He dropped his hands to his sides and pinched his legs. Nothing. 

Michael looked equally as mortified; mouth switching from a positional grin to a closed, straight line, eyes growing behind his frames. “Jeremy?” He asked in the same questioning tone.

They both stood there for what felt like a minute, absorbing the craziness of the situation while children bustled in their seats, curiously searching through their desks. “Actually, his name is Mr. Heere,” said a small brunette boy, tugging on Michael’s suit jacket by leaning over at his desk.

Michael laughed nervously. “You’re right, I am so sorry,” he glanced down to talk to the young pupil. “Mr. Heere,” he corrected, staring directly at the red faced teacher. “What a coincidence, right?” he spoke in a lower tone so only Jeremy could hear.

Jeremy could not find the humor in this situation. He already felt shitty enough about his...escapade...but now? The repercussions were almost laughable. A hookup that was already embarrassing enough was now going to haunt him for an entire school year. Not only would he have to encounter Michael during classroom parties and parent-teacher conferences, but every time he looked at Emmy, he’d only get an all too vivid memory of doing not so classroom appropriate things with her father. 

“You-you’re married?” Jeremy snapped back in a whisper, eyes squinted in accusation. He felt another gush go through his stomach, like a drop on a rollercoaster. Sure, he never thought to ask during the short time of their first meeting, but he had sex with a married parent? Not only was he a shitty post-sex conversationalist, but now he was a homewrecker. 

“Divorced, actually,” Michael responded with a hint of annoyance, showing his naked left hand. “But thanks for the quick judgement.”

Jeremy blushed even further. Fuck. As if this situation couldn’t get any worse, he now made Michael mad. “Oh god no- I didn’t mean-” he stuttered trying to find words for a quick apology. 

“Its fine.”

What felt like another minute passed by. Michael’s hands in his suit pockets, scanning the classroom. Jeremy’s fingers fidgety by his sides, coming up to provoke the hem of his all-too warm sweater. 

“Well, I need to uh..,” Jeremy trailed off, glancing towards the chaotic scene of twenty six newly minted six year olds anxious to begin. 

“Oh, yes, duh,” Michael let out another nervous laugh, stepping backwards and rubbing his hands on his thighs. “Uh, have fun.”

Jeremy flashed a quick closed mouth grin and waved, walking up towards the front of the classroom. I’m not gonna let this get to me, he thought. Just because it might’ve started on a odd, slightly mortifying note didn’t mean that Jeremy couldn’t turn the school year around. 

Positive thinking, right?  
_____________________________________________________________

Jeremy groaned and placed his hands on the small of his back, stretching out his already sore muscles while walking to his safe haven; the teacher’s lounge. It was only barely lunch recess, and the day was already turning out to be a little much for him. He was doing his best to stay professional and fun for his still new and excitable students, but his mind couldn’t help but wander back to Michael. So many new questions had time to fester and root themselves in his head. Who was Michael married to? Why didn’t it last? What evil did Jeremy do in a past life to have this situation thrust upon him?

He was quickly interrupted from his reverie by his coworkers, who waved him over from a table in the corner of the lounge, next to the broken coffee machine and a green fish tank that had definitely seen better days. 

“Happy first day!” Christine exclaimed, patting Jeremy’s shoulder while he pulled up a chair and dropped his brown bag on the table. “How’s life down in first grade?”

“Brooke was telling us how she got screwed over by you and got stuck with all the naughty kids,” Rich said, mouth full of his overflowing sandwich. 

“It’s true! Usually they split them up evenly between us but I swear on my life Jeremy got all the angels because it has been a wild ride so far,” Brooke defended with a tired sigh, sipping on her water.

“It’s the first day, there’s always gonna be some hiccups,” Christine tried to soothe Brooke’s frustrations. 

“Speaking of hiccups, you got any good first day stories for us dude?” Rich swallowed his bite, directing his question to Jeremy.

Did he ever. 

Jeremy wanted to laugh. He couldn’t believe how absurd this was. “Actually, yes. But less hiccup, more vomit situation,” he grimaced, his appetite slowing decreasing as he braced himself for the tale. 

“Oh god, throw up is the WORST,” Christine groaned.

“That’s why I always tell my kids to just book it out the door, I don’t even need an explanation,” Rich advised, holding his arms up in defense and shaking his head in disgust. 

“No, no, not actual throw up,” Jeremy rolled his eyes. “More like...the guy I hooked up with two nights ago is now a parent to one of my students,” he finished his sentence quickly and closed his eyes, not wanting to face his friends’ reactions. 

It was dead silent for a good five seconds. Jeremy peaked open his left eye, preparing for the worst. Rich, Christine, and Brooke looked rehearsed; all of them mouths agape (save for Rich, who was chewing). 

“WHAT THE FU-”

“Language, Rich!” Brooke exclaimed and speedily brought her hands to cover her friend’s mouth.

“Are we in a movie? Where’s the camera?” Christine questioned, darting her eyes and dramatically turning around in her seat.

“Guys, please, I need help!” Jeremy was exasperated, putting his face in his hands while his elbows took purchase on the table. 

“Well we need a little more content than that!” Rich countered, now trying hard to suppress a grin. “Only to Jeremy Heere would this happen.”

“He just like...was there! Dropping off his daughter like any normal parent I guess. Then he tried to make light of it by marveling on how coincidental it all was? And then I asked him if he was married, which apparently he is not. I don’t know, I’m sure it only lasted maybe two minutes but it felt like a lifetime,” Jeremy explained haphazardly. Thinking back on it, it really could have been worse. Maybe he was making a big deal out of nothing, completely overreacting. But it sure did leave things left covered up and unfinished. 

“Okay, okay, here’s some solid good advice. One hundred percent proven to work, tested by yours truly,” Rich started copying Jeremy to put his elbows on the surface, leaning in. “Every year you get two types of parents. Exhibit A: the parent that never shows up to anything. Completely MIA all year long. If that’s the case, you’re off the hook! 

“However, he did show up to the first day and took the liberty of introducing himself, so I’m gonna take a hard pass on that one. Now we got exhibit B: the bipolar parent,” Rich continued, stopping to shove the final quarter of his sandwich into his mouth, much to his friends’ disgust. “Now, this one will show up to all the required stuff, like conferences, Halloween parties, etc. Likes to make an appearance to show they care, but are really too busy to put in much work,” he stopped again to pull out a bag of chips and proceeded to munch. Jeremy was still listening in. “If our four eyed hottie is one of these, it’s a tad trickier. He’s not gonna be entirely avoidable, but usually there’s plenty of other distractions and parents that’ll be present too, so you’ll be easily occupied with other stuff.”

Okay. Jeremy wasn’t gonna love that option, but it was doable. He could handle Exhibit B. He knew from experience it did get really busy during conference season or holiday parties. Not ideal, but manageable. 

“Lastly, we got exhibit C. This is our most extreme category yet so buckle up, buttercup,” Rich shoved his hand back into the plastic to retrieve more of the processed snack. “This kind of parent is the MOST. They have absolutely nothing better to do than volunteer in the classroom once a week to help grade papers or some shit, gladly sign up to do the worst shifts at the bake sale, and choreograph an entire game plan for the field trip you haven’t even planned yet. Long story short, they don’t leave you alone! Which is usually a pretty rad deal, because they’re basically your unpaid assistant. But if our dark haired darling is one of these bad boys, then I say give up on trying to avoid him.”

“Give up?!” Jeremy repeated, leaning back in his chair. All that monologuing for no new advice. He should’ve known not to bring this up with Rich.

“Yeah. Then whenever your kids are at PE or recess, clear off your desk and have him fuck you to th-”

“OKAY RICH!” Brooke exclaimed to cut him off. “That is obviously not going to be an option! You have to be professional about it.”

“Just try to pretend it never happened. Brush it off as much as you can,” Christine added.

“Fine, you’re right, you’re right,” Rich conceded. “It would never work. Jeremy only has like two turtlenecks and they’re really not his style. How could he cover up the hickies?”

Jeremy was about to intercede but was luckily saved by the bell signaling the end of lunch. He saw Christine give Rich a quick punch as he packed up his half eaten meal, ready to distract himself with his new students, and silently praying that Michael was exhibit A. 

_____________________________________________________________________

The rest of his day went as uneventful as a first day could, with Jeremy working his brain tirelessly to connect personalities to faces and faces to names. He was quite grateful for all the hustle and bustle, as it kept his mind securely hidden from impending thoughts from his personal life. He could usually get a decent view on the outlook of the school year, and this year was no different. Maybe Brooke was right; he did get lucky. Almost all of his students were decently behaved, as much as mischievous and bouncy six year olds could. 

However, the day did have to end eventually, much to Jeremy’s dismay. The bell tolled for the final time that day, setting off a chain reaction of students pouring out of the classroom doors, anxious to go home. After Jeremy had waved goodbye to his speedy students and given them over to the yard duties, he made his way over to his desk and gratefully took a seat. Surprisingly enough, Jeremy never really was granted relief at his desk throughout most of the day; with a jam packed schedule and excitable children, it was nearly impossible to find time for a break.

Just as he was packing up his school bag to head home, he heard his door open. He smiled at the sight of Brooke, who dramatically trudged through the doorway, groaning when she reached the desk.

“Long day?” Jeremy asked, amused, smile still plastered on his face.

Brooke returned a scowl. “You could say that. I think the students aren’t the only ones still on summer mode. I am exhausted.”

Jeremy chuckled in agreement from his spot at his desk. “You say this every year. Give a few weeks, you’ll be fine,” he tried comforting, reaching over his desktop computer to squeeze her hand.

“And you say THAT every year,” Brooke countered. “How are yours?”

“Usual. Nice and cute enough, have a few rowdy ones,” Jeremy explained vaguely. 

“I can handle a ‘few rowdy ones’. But I’m pretty sure 75% of them are gonna be in that category,” Brooke responded with a huff, turning her back from him and walking back towards the door. “Anyway, I’m gonna go buy myself a bottle of wine and watch The Bachelor.”

Jeremy laughed. “Have a good night!” he waved.

“Yeah, yeah, you too,” the blonde mimicked a failed attempt at a wave and exited. 

Jeremy chuckled and shook his head, returning to organize his papers into his bag. He pulled on his sweater in annoyance; he really was excited to head back to his apartment and take this damn suffocating machine off. Now that Brooke said it, a glass of wine and cheesy reality TV shows sounded like the perfect antidote to end this weird day. 

The door opened again.

“Hey, do you have room for one more on your wild night?” Jeremy asked humorously, not looking up from his work and began to log off his computer. 

“I’m not sure about how wild it’s gonna be, but I’m sure I can accommodate you,” a voice teased back, only it was significantly lower than Brooke’s. A voice a little too familiar. 

Jeremy whipped his head up.

Fuck.

“Oh my god, I thought you were uh, someone else,” Jeremy flustered, face turning beet red in an instant. “I am s-so sorry.” 

Michael grinned, the same wide smile from two nights ago that had lured Jeremy in in the first place. The brunette felt his stomach churn. “I figured. You have a hot date tonight or something?” 

Jeremy flushed even deeper, somehow still glued to his chair, content with hiding behind his desk. “Uh..no. Nope,” he hated how flustered he sounded, too embarrassed to expand. 

Michael in turn decided to glance around the room, hands in his pockets, slowly strolling closer to his desk. “I just..uh..wanted to..uh,” he chuckled nervously. Now it was Michael’s turn to stumble.

Jeremy took his falting as encouragement for himself. “This doesn’t..like..have to be a thing. We don’t have to discuss it anymore. It can be like it never happened.” He finally got the courage to stand, but nailed his feet to the floor. 

Michael’s face turned into an indiscernible reaction; something between surprise and disappointment, frozen like a statue for a good five seconds. “Yeah, yeah of course,” he shook his head, face returning to the easy going smirk. “I mean, you are my daughter’s teacher.”

“Yeah.”

“This is probably the best way to go.” Michael wouldn’t make eye contact. As if Jeremy could’ve handled it if he did. 

“Yep.” Jeremy left his hands to fiddle with his slack pockets. 

Silence.

“Anyways, I should get going. Emmy can only be distracted by the swings for so lo-...oh my god!” Michael exclaimed, causing Jeremy to look up. The darker one walked over to a poster covered wall. “You know Apocolypse of the Damned?!” his excitable smile made a reprise. Jeremy wanted him to look at him like that forever. 

“Uh..yeah,” the brunette stammered, picking up his heavy feet and walking closer to Michael. “Actually, I was kinda obsessed with it in high school.”

“No way!” Jeremy couldn’t help but smile at Michael’s infectious, childlike giddiness. “Me too! I love all that old, vintage stuff.”

“God, I can’t even remember how long it took me to pass Level 9,” Jeremy reminisced, staring up at the poster. 

“Ugh, that one was so difficult,” Michael agreed with a chuckle.

They both peeled their faces away from the image at the same time, finally locking eyes, crinkly with their wide, relaxed smiles. Jeremy felt his breathing speed up. From this close, he could smell Michael’s cologne, the same one from nights previous. 

The door opened again. 

“Daddy, hurry up!” the voice of Emmy could be heard, snapping them out of their trance. She skipped over to the pair, grabbing Michael’s tan hand and trying her best to drag him away from Jeremy. “You said we could get ice cream!”

Jeremy looked away, trying to hide his blush. Michael laughed, facing his attention towards the pink clad girl. “Alright, alright. We’re leaving. Say goodbye to Mr. Heere,” he looked back up at said man. 

“Bye Mr. Heere! See you tomorrow!” Emmy waved and pranced back towards the door, the promise of ice cream being a bit stronger than her patience would allow. 

“Bye Emmy!” Jeremy answered, his teacher-voice back on. 

“Bye, Jeremy,” Michael said quietly with that damn smirk back on his ridiculously smooth face, allowing himself to be pulled along by his daughter. 

Jeremy shuddered. He shouldn’t like how his name sounded off of Michael’s tongue so much. “Bye,” he answered in a half whisper. 

 

Fuck. He was so screwed.

________________________________________

12:04.

Jeremy groaned, glancing at his phone for what felt like the millionth time since he’d gotten into bed. All he wanted to do was sleep, but his mind couldn’t stop racing. He knew he should be getting over the whole situation with Michael, but he couldn’t stop thinking about him, or the many questions that kept expanding in his brain. He wanted to know so much more about him. Every new interaction he had with him only left Jeremy more curious. What kind of man hooks up with strangers in bars, plays irrelevant, decades-old video games, and is a divorced parent? He hated how much he desired to get to know more about one of his student’s parents. Michael was like a forbidden present Jeremy desperately wanted to unwrap. 

Okay, way to take that to the gutter, Jeremy thought with a grimace, unable to stop the parade of not suitable for work images featuring himself and Michael front and center clicking through his brain like a slideshow. He sighed, placing an arm over his face in frustration as he felt his dick start to stir.  
I mean, if he couldn’t act on it in real life, what was the harm of doing it himself?  
He gave in, hating himself more and more the closer his hand got to the waistband of his underwear. He closed his eyes, letting his head fall back on his pillow relaxingly as his hand made contact with his half hard cock. For the first time since it happened, he allowed himself to linger on the events of two nights prior. As rushed and heated as it was, Jeremy couldn’t help but let out a small whimper, thinking about how warm and firm Michael’s skin felt on his own. 

He finally wrapped his fingers around his dick firmly, sighing at the touch. He slowly started to pump himself, imagining it was Michael’s hand instead of his own. The way he expertly made him come undone within minutes only made the heat in his stomach coil up tighter. He ran a thumb over his sensitive head, his mind drifting from the images of his hook up to the scenarios of his imagination; Michael’s strong hands gripping his thighs tightly as he sucked him off, Michael cementing those hickies even further with hard licks and bites, Michael’s wonderfully soft moans when Jeremy played with his nipples. 

By now, Jeremy was fully hard, chest starting to heave as his breathing got quicker. His hand got faster as he used his precome to lube the way. Fuck, he was so turned on at this point that Rich’s previous statement about having Michael fuck him on his fucking desk sounded like a fantastically hot idea. Imagining that dark skin colliding with his in the most intimate way made Jeremy yearn for more, hand getting impossibly quicker, the friction becoming almost too much. 

The heat in his stomach became too much, and Jeremy bite his hand as he came over his hand and stomach, panting as he touched himself throughout the aftershocks, only pulling away when overstimulation started to sink in. He grimaced and sat up to grab a tissue to clean himself off.

Well, that definitely didn’t improve things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading my shit pt 2 
> 
> (i know i will regret saying this, but ive spiraled.  
> ...  
> ill try to update every 7-10 days, but no promises. ya girls a busy one)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just gonna tell u in advance; this is a little bit of a filler, but its needed. i got hopefully good stuff planned for later chapters, i promise

  
Turns out, Michael was an exhibit B parent.

 

It was actually going just fine. In fact, it seemed Michael was sticking to him and Jeremy’s arrangement. Since the first day, Jeremy had only seen Michael a handful of times, and thankfully never on a one-on-one basis. They would always exchange the friendly smile, the courteous handshake, and polite small talk. It was almost like nothing had ever happened, and Jeremy could pretend he didn’t use the other man as masturbation material twice a week. 

 

It was such a good arrangement, in fact, that Jeremy was able to finally put his attention on his students. He had a good rhythm between himself and his kids, and it was shaping up to be a great school year. Surprisingly, most of the naughtier kids were tamable within a few weeks. 

 

That is, until the incident with Emmy.  

 

Emmy was never a problem kid for Jeremy; in fact, she was one of the smartest ones in his class, always eager to learn about a new math lesson or to read a new book. Although she’d sometimes be on the chatty side, her teacher never saw the bouncy brunette as an issue. Until one Tuesday, when Jeremy had gotten a phone call on his lunch, calling him to the principal’s office. 

 

Confused, Jeremy made his way the main offices. He gave the request a good thought, and immediately rolled his eyes. It was probably just Thomas again. He’d presumably pushed one too many kids again, and Jeremy would have to have the same talk with him, which would definitely go over his head. However, once he entered the small office and saw the tiny blob of pink sitting angrily, he raised his eyebrows in surprise. 

 

“Principal Stevens? You asked to see me?” Jeremy asked, sitting in the green plush seat next to his pupil. 

 

“It seems we have a little issue with Miss Emmy here,” the balding principal explained, gesturing towards the fuming girl, whose eyes wouldn’t leave the floor. She kicked her blue Sketchers back and forth. “At lunchtime she stole Jenny Clark’s cookies, and proceeded to eat them right in front of her. Then when the yard duties told her she would have to skip out of recess, she deliberately disobeyed and ran onto the playground.”

 

“Oh,” Jeremy said, completely bewildered. “Why would you do that, Emmy?” he looked down at her, concerned. 

 

Emmy replied with silence, still fuming and kicking her feet. 

 

“She then proceeded to sit at the top of the slide and would not let any other students pass through,” the principal added with a stern look. 

 

“Principal Stevens, I assure you that this is not typical behavior for Emmy,” Jeremy defended, the clear confusion on his face still evident to help his case. “She has always been a very good student both in and out of class.”

 

“I’m aware this is her first offense, but I believe some punishment must be taken,” the older man repremanded. 

 

“I understand. Completely,” Jeremy stated. “Let me just talk to Emmy real quick, and I’m sure we can come up with a compromise,” he placed a hand on the back of the little girl’s chair.

 

The authoritative man was silent for a few moments, looking back between the pair. He sighed in defeat moments later. “Fine. We can compromise,” he said, standing up and walking towards the door to open it. “But I need a formidable conclusion by the end of the day. Otherwise we’re doing it my way.”

 

“Yes, that’s totally fair,” Jeremy tried to hide his smile of relief. He stood up and grabbed Emmy’s hand. “Thanks again, Principal Stevens,” he thanked once more as he took the little girl and walked out of the office, hand in hand. Emmy was still adamant in leaving her silent head down in defeat. 

 

“So… you wanna tell me why you stole Jenny Clark’s cookies?” Jeremy started abruptly, not really knowing how to start this difficult conversation. They had decided to sit on the wall behind the kindergarten classrooms, which were completely empty thanks to recess. 

 

Emmy shrugged. Her head had migrated from facing the cool cement to looking out at the grassy field before them. Baby steps. 

 

“Was it because you were hungry?” Jeremy asked, trying to start with small questions to help the child feel more comfortable. 

 

Another shrug. 

 

“Do you know why you had to go to the principal’s office?” 

 

Those tiny shoulders went up and down again.

 

“Emmy,” Jeremy stated more firmly. “If you don’t talk to me, you’ll have to talk to Principal Stevens. Your choice,” he said flatly, giving her an ultimatum. 

 

They sat in silence for a few moments, while Jeremy waited patiently for Emmy to respond. Already his ass was beginning to hurt, and he stretched out his long legs trying to get more comfortable. 

 

After what felt like five whole minutes, Emmy mumbled something quietly. Jeremy was so surprised by a verbal reaction that he sat up. “What did you say?”

 

“I’m sad,” Emmy restated, only a scoch louder. If Jeremy wasn’t concentrated so hard he would’ve missed it completely. 

 

Jeremy wanted to hug her. Her voice sounded very little and quite defeated, nothing like the usual charismatic and loud Emmy he had grown to love. “Why are you sad?” he asked in the same whispered tone. He wanted the little girl to trust him.

 

“Mommy was ‘posed to come see me. She was gonna paint my nails and we were gonna watch movies. But then she couldn’t. Because of work,” Emmy explained, picking at the small patches of grass growing in between the sidewalk cracks. She didn’t want to look up. Jeremy understood. 

 

“And then Daddy said that we could do all that together instead, he’d do my nails for me, but he ended up just messing up and spilling it everywhere. He isn’t very good at Mommy stuff,” Emmy finally got the courage to look up at her teacher with a grimace. “It happens a lot. He’s not very good at doing my hair in the morning either, he always pulls too hard. And Jenny Clark was talking about her and her mommy go do all these fun things together like tea parties and play American Girl dolls. It’s not fair that Jenny Clark gets to have a mommy to do all that but I don’t.” Head back to the floor. 

 

Her teacher sat there for a moment, processing everything Emmy had said. Somehow, the pieces started coming together in his mind. He knew that Emmy’s parents were divorced, a fact that had been nagging at him for way too long now, and that he had yet to meet Emmy’s mom. And sure, he didn’t know the whole story; he didn’t need to. The basics were all there, and he could start to understand. Maybe Emmy was just as lonely as her father. 

 

“You know,” Jeremy started, moving his legs to mimic Emmy’s criss-crossed position. “My mommy went away when I was just a little bit older than you. She had something to do somewhere else, and then it was just me and my dad. At first, I was really sad, just like you. My mommy was supposed to take me to play practice every Tuesday. And when the first Tuesday passed without her there, I missed it. I was really mad at my dad for forgetting to take me. But turns out, he was just as sad as me. He missed my mommy, too. I think it’s important to sometimes understand that adults can get sad, too. Maybe your daddy was also sad that your mommy couldn’t come see you,” Jeremy tried explaining. He didn’t want to overstep his bounds. “All I know is that he loves you very much and he’s trying to be both a mommy and a daddy, which is hard, because sometimes it seems that mommies are irreplaceable. Maybe if you guys work together, and you tell your daddy how you feel, it might not be so bad after all.”

 

“But why does Jenny Clark and everyone else get to have mommies but I don’t?” Emmy asked earnestly, looking up at her teacher with sad eyes. 

 

“I asked myself that same question, too, Emmy,” Jeremy replied, trying not to cry at her heartbreaking expression. “Sometimes, we don’t always get what we want. We just kinda have to look at what we’ve got and be happy about it.”

 

“Okay,” Emmy accepted in defeat.

 

“Hey, I know that nobody else in first grade has as cool of shoes you do. They’re pink AND they light up! Definitely the coolest,” Jeremy complimented, trying to improve both their moods. 

 

Emmy let out a small giggle. “I got them for my birthday from my daddy.”

 

“And you have a super cool daddy, too! I mean, it really can’t get better than light up sneakers and awesome dads who will buy them for you,” Jeremy smiled down at her, nudging the tinier shoulder next to him. 

 

__________________________

 

After their quick heart to heart, Jeremy and Emmy were able to make a compromise that would please their principal. Emmy apologized to Jenny Clark, and would have to sit out of recess for a week. As much as Jeremy tried to avoid it, a call to Michael was made as well. Which gave him the wonderful task of explaining the events to a man he couldn’t look straight in their eyes without picturing his dick.

 

Jeremy glanced up at the clock again, clicking his pen impatiently at his desk. It had been seven minutes since the final bell rang, and he was supposed to be meeting with Mr. Mell any second now.

_This shouldn’t be this difficult,_ he thought to himself. He had meetings like this with parents all the time.  __ _Stop making it weird. It's not weird. Weirdo._

 

He jumped when he heard the heavy door to his classroom open. He looked over at Michael, who’s hands had definitely been running consistently through his hair and work suit still tightly in tact. 

 

“I am really sorry about all this,” Michael started, a little breathless as he made his way to sit opposite Jeremy at his desk. “Emmy never acts out like this. I was so surprised when I got the call. I assure you she’ll be getting puni-”

 

Jeremy stopped him. “I know I know. I felt the same way, actually. Because, like, I’ve never had an issue with her either,” he paused, not knowing if he should continue. He wanted to bring up the tough conversation he had had with Michael’s daughter, but the worrier in him halted him. If there was one thing Jeremy thrived at, it was creating an awkward atmosphere. He had already done that plenty of times with Michael. Maybe it was best to just stay quiet. “I..I uh- think she was just having a bad day.”

 

Michael let out a mix of a sigh and a groan, letting his head fall into his open palms. “Shit,” he mumbled, bringing his hands through his thick dark hair before pulling his head back up. “Her mom was supposed to come see her last weekend, but..uh...something came up and she had to cancel last minute. Ugh, I should’ve known this would set her off,” Michael explained, saying the last line almost to himself. “Jesus, I am so sorry, Jeremy,” he chose that moment to make direct eye contact with the uncomfortable teacher. 

 

Michael could have been apologizing for murdering Jeremy’s fucking cat and he still would’ve melted. “It’s okay. It’s none of my business, I-I get it. Emmy apologized to the girl and she understands the consequences behind it. I didn’t even want to have you in because I know this’ll only be a one time thing. Hopefully,” Jeremy stammered, glancing down at his hands. He was really grateful for the bulky desk in between them. 

 

“It’s just getting worse and worse, you know?” Michael started, obviously flustered. “She sees her less and less, and it’s just so frustrating. You can’t get a six year old’s hopes up like that.”

 

Jeremy mumbled awkwardly, not knowing what to say. This was definitely getting into more personal boundaries, something he had hoped he swore off when he decided to forget their attraction. As curious as he was, he knew it was better to stay as guarded as possible. The less he knew about Michael, the better.

 

“Shit. Sorry. Too much information,” Michael shook his head, wiping his hands on his pants like they were the reason he opened up. “Again, I promise it won’t happen again. I plan on having a very long talk with her tonight.”

 

Jeremy gave a half, closed lipped smile. “I get it. Emmy’s a good girl,” he said sympathetically. 

 

“Yeah, she is,” Michael grinned sadly back at him. “Thanks for getting her off the hook with Principal Stevens, by the way.”

 

Jeremy felt a blush creeping up his neck. “It was nothing, really.”

 

“No, really. And for taking the time to talk to her, not everyone would do that. I really, 

appreciate it,” Michael interrupted sincerely, those dark eyes piercing through the paler one. 

 

“It’s my job,” Jeremy argued weakly, trying desperately to keep the terrifying eye contact. 

 

“Anyway, I should, uh, head out. Take care of the troublemaker,” Michael said, standing up and raising out his hand to shake Jeremy’s.

 

Jeremy also got up and tried to not think about how easy Michael could transfer conversation, both spoken and unspoken. “Yeah,” he breathed, shaky fingers and a clammy palm meeting Michael’s in a firm handshake. “Have a good night.”

 

“I’ll see you next Friday, then,” Michael gave him that stomach churning, toothy grin that made Jeremy want to kiss it off of him. 

 

“Friday?” Jeremy asked, confused. 

 

“Yeah. The Halloween party?” Michael replied with a cock of his head. “I signed up to help on that sheet you sent home.”

 

Jeremy’s head came back to reality. “Oh. Right, right,” he responded. This was the downside to the exhibit B parent; he would still have to deal with him at parties. Rich was right. “Yeah. See you next Friday,” he answered in a much more stable tone. 

 

Shit. Would he ever catch a break from this stupidly handsome Pepsi employee?

 

He secretly hoped not. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're thinking "wow that was short" i know im sorry i promise i shall make up for it next chapter


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i wrote approximately 67% of this while drunk i love college!!!

Jeremy froze in horror for three seconds before covering his mouth in a baffled laugh. “There is no way in hell I will ever wear that.”

 

“It’s cute!” Christine giggled back, completely muffled by the large, rubbery mask covering her face. The grotesque, over saturated goblin face looked completely wrong on the short girl’s head when her body housed a bright yellow, swirly dress. “Definitely a casual look. Totally wearable again,” she gasped, this time a little more clear as she ripped the humid cover off with a wide smile.

 

“I can already think of seven of my students would be be scarred for life if they saw me wearing that,” Jeremy joked, taking the surprisingly heavy costume from his friend and putting it back on the shelf where it belonged. 

 

The two friends were some of the many people who waited until last minute to purchase a costume for the holiday, and the tacky Halloween store they went to was packed with people. 

 

“Ugh. Why can’t I be like Brooke and plan ahead?” Christine said with a grimace. “I always tell myself every year to have a set costume at least two weeks in advance, but I can never decide!” 

 

“We could always go to the grocery store and get a safe-for-work produce to use as weapons,” Jeremy deadpanned, referencing the time Rich came to work  as Jason from Friday the 13th, complete with a baguette as his machete. He was so charismatic that he ended up winning best costume. He never got a new costume, and  had won every single year after that. 

 

“What if we did a fun dynamic duo costume? Like Salt and Pepper?” Christine suggested hopefully.

 

Jeremy scowled. “But we’re not gonna be together all day. Then we’ll just look dumb,” he pointed out. 

 

“Well what do _you_  suggest then, Mr. Idea Crusher?” Christine demanded with a hint of humor in her bright eyes.

 

“I might have an idea.”

 

__________________________________________

Jeremy twisted his face into a scowl and put his arm around a blonde Christine, gazing towards the phone Brooke was holding. He blinked after a blinding flash sparked from the device. 

 

“Jesus, Brooke. It’s 12 in the afternoon. Do we really need flash?” Jeremy groaned, resisting the tempting urge to wipe his eyes. His face was covered in a green layer of makeup and his nose was still not used to the pasty feeling. He went cross eyed for a moment to try and study the extra prosthetic on his nose, creating a cartoonishly witchy look. 

 

“I just want options!” Brooke protested, lowering her head to look at the photos. She was dressed as a creepily accurate version of Miss Frizzle. The natural blonde had always been known for her ability to transform into a character for Halloween. “I have to document your costumes! I don’t think I’ve ever seen you put this much work into a Halloween, ever.”

 

“Don’t we look great?” Christine squealed, spinning around in her pink sparkly ball gown. Although she had wanted the iconic blue dress from Defying Gravity, this was the only one she could find on such short notice. She bat her dramatically long eyelashes and grinned. 

 

“You guys were the kids I hated in high school,” Rich piped in, sitting in Jeremy’s chair and his black boots reclining on the desk. 

 

“Hey, I gotta pay homage to the only thing that kept me sane during adolescence,” Christine defended.  “I even wrote my AP English essay on how _Wicked_ da bbled between the good and evil stereotypes,” she added proudly. 

 

“Please stop talking,” Rich deadpanned. 

 

“You’re just jealous,” Jeremy put on the recognizable hat worn by Elphaba in the show. “Sorry we have the creativity to actually change our costumes each year.” 

 

“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” Rich corrected, taking a bite out of his baguette. 

 

“Now that we’re done with photos I really gotta go back to my room. The bell’s gonna ring in fifteen minutes and I need to set out my pumpkin craft,” Brooke declared, adjusting the red cat eye glasses on her face and giving the phone back to Jeremy. 

 

“I am so glad 6th graders are over the whole craft thing,” Rich murmured under his breath, standing up as well. “Have fun trying to wrangle up 30 six year olds hyped up on sugar!” He called out, accompanying Brooke out the door to the loud playground. 

“Wanna help me set up the donuts on the string?” Jeremy asked his only remaining friend,  gesturing towards the larger table in the corner of the classroom. He had already put together the three rods that would hold up the sugary treats, and connected the paper bat wings to the powdered dessert. 

 

“Sure!” Christine answered happily, sitting down next to her costumed coworker. “Your kids are gonna freak when they see you,” she added with a smile, joining him in the meticulous task of cutting and tying string. 

 

“Right back at you,” Jeremy stuck out his tongue through closed lips in concentration, viliantly attempting to complete one wrap around. “This is way harder than I thought it would be.”

 

Christine let out a giggle, standing up to finish tying the donut on the empty rod. “Here, let me help,” she came back over towards the table, just as the door opened.

 

“Are we too early?” Jeremy looked up to see Sam’s dad (who’s name he couldn’t remember to save his life) and Michael (a name he _wished_ he could forget).

 

“Nope, you’re right on time,” Jeremy smiled, standing up quickly. 

 

“Oh good. I saw the kids were still outside but Michael said we would be fine,” The taller of the pair explained with a wide smile. “Your costumes look rad!”

 

Jeremy opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off by Christine, who had defied the laws of speed and zoomed over to the trio. “Well, thank you. We’re Glinda and Elphaba from Wicked,” she added with a shallow giggle, eyes fixated on the Backstreet Boy reject. “I’m Christine Canigula. 4th grade,” she held out her hand to the parents.

 

“Jake Dillinger. Sam’s dad,” Jake took her outstretched hand, the height difference between them almost comical. 

 

“Uh Michael. Emmy’s dad,” Michael lamely copied and shook the bubbly teacher’s palm, his face clearly conveying his attempt at pretending that they didn’t have a mutual friend.

 

Luckily for Jeremy, Christine was either oblivious or a very good actress. “Nice to meet you both!”

 

“Now I feel lame without a costume,” Jake added, looking down at his jeans and polo shirt.

“Same,” Michael added shyly. Jeremy gazed over at his typical work outfit. He wondered what Michael looked like in T-shirt. 

 

“So how can we help?” Jake asked, breaking the inevitable awkward silence that followed. 

 

“Um, I just need to hang up a few more of those paper pumpkins on the window, and someone to man the candy station so it’s not all gone two seconds after they come back in,” Jeremy chuckled softly, avoiding looking at Michael. He felt embarrassed, now regretting his outfit choice. Michael probably thought it was so weird. Why did he care so much?

 

“Guess I’ll take the pumpkins,” the taller parent said, clearly gesturing his height as his reasoning behind the choice. 

 

“I’ll join you!” Christine echoed a little too happily as the two made their way to the other side of the classroom.

 

Jeremy smiled at Michael sheepishly. This was gonna be a long afternoon.

 

____________________________________

 

Thirty minutes later, full chaos had erupted in Mr. Heere's classroom. The desks were pushed to the outside ends of the room, while games and pictures were being taken in the middle. Giggles and squeals fueled by cookies and candy filled the space. Jeremy couldn’t help but laugh at the childish reactions he received from his costume. His students were really getting a kick out of it, and that itchy makeup was totally worth it when he could see their entertained smiles looking up at him. 

 

After leading a few rounds of Halloween themed charades, Jeremy had let the kids go about the classroom indepently to peruse all the stations. This definitely was one of his favorite holidays, and he loved seeing all his hard work get put to good use. He had a surprising amount of parental volunteers this year to help chaperone, so Jeremy was back to torturing himself at the donut game, frantically trying to tie more sweets as the costumed children seemed to eat them faster than he could count. 

 

Jeremy was so engrossed in a certain thin string that just _wouldn't tie_  that he didn’t even notice the figure that made his way next to him.

 

“Need some help?” 

 

Jeremy jumped, earning him a hearty laugh from Michael. His heart was beating much faster. Probably because of the scare. Obviously. 

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Michael kept his smile as he moved closer to the teacher so they were practically shoulder to shoulder. A few inches closer and they’d be touching. “I just saw you from over at my candy station, and you looked like you were struggling.”

 

Jeremy tried not to blush at the fact that Michael was looking at him, or think about how stupid he must’ve looked, large plastic nose wrinkling under the pasty paint. “These stupid strings keep slipping off the donuts,” he explained, trying to keep his frustration at bay, eyes still fixated on the snack.

 

“Let me help,” Michael replied, moving his hands over Jeremy’s green ones, letting his fingers glaze over Jeremy’s before taking the food away from the teacher’s grasp. Michael began to tie it in record time, handing it back to Jeremy to place on the rod for the impatient students. “See? Easy,” Michael said warmly. Jeremy pried his eyes away from those flexible fingers to look into warm chocolate eyes. 

 

“I know it’s _easy_ !” Jeremy complained with a suppressed grin. “But I think those strings are conspiring against me or something. I don’t know why I can’t get it.”

 

“Mr. Heere, my dad is a really good teacher. I’m sure you can get it,” Emmy piped in from her spot in line waiting to play the game. _I'm sure he's an excellent teacher_ , Jeremy thought with a embarassed smirk. 

 

“What does conspurring mean?” Sam asked with a raised hand, standing under the rod with eyes fixated on the powdered donut. 

 

“Conspiring is an excuse for when someone, or Mr. Heere in this case, can’t do something and needs to blame it on inanimate objects,” Michael joked, giving Jeremy a wink. Jesus. Between the playful banter and how he could feel Michael’s heat through their thick clothes, Jeremy didn’t know how long he could keep this up. 

 

“Hey, hey, no. Let the actual teacher give them the real definition, thank you,” Jeremy countered, forcing himself to break the eye contact. “Sam, to conspire is when some people or things band together to do some scheming.”

 

“I like Emmy’s dad’s version better,” another girl commented with a giggle. Jeremy opened his mouth in protest as the rest of the small group joined in with laughter.

 

“Well, Mr. Heere, looks like the people have spoken,” Michael raised his shoulders and chuckled, showing off that addictive, toothy smile. Jeremy didn’t care how many more ties he’d have to do to keep being the reason behind that grin. 

 

“Guys, guys! Sam’s dad is doing a bunch of cool monster voices! Come see!” Thomas, another blonde, blue eyed pupil ran over, grabbing the trio and pulling them over to the entertainment. Jeremy looked over to see his students gazing up in admiration at Jake’s goofy expressions. 

 

“I don’t know if I had the chance to say this earlier, but your costume looks fantastic,” Michael said softly, nudging the thin shoulder next to him. 

 

“Aw, geez,” Jeremy looked down. He was never very good with compliments. “I was afraid I looked ridiculous.”

 

“Ridiculous? Dude, I wish I had the balls to go all out like you. The most I do is put on some sunglasses and a fedora and say I’m one of the Blues Brothers.” 

 

Jeremy snorted in response.

 

“But seriously, the kids are loving it. And the party, like, wow. It looks awesome, the candy is awesome, _you_ look awesome,” Michael trailed off, avoiding Jeremy’s face as he looked around the room. 

 

“I mean, it would’ve all come crashing down if it wasn’t for your amazingly organized candy passer-outing,” Jeremy replied with a smile that seemed like it was permanently plastered on there. 

 

Michael copied his grin, meeting his eyes. “Now you’re just embarrassing me,” he joked. 

 

“No, out of all my years of teaching, I have never had a more efficient candy run. I think you’ve found your calling in life,” Jeremy was almost surprised how easy it was to talk to Michael. It was like the night of their first meeting; it felt like he didn’t need to carefully filter and stumble over his thoughts. Everything they talked about just...flowed. It was the most natural Jeremy had ever felt. 

 

“You’re so right. I’m gonna go call Pepsi right now, tell them that they have nothing on my new passion. How well does it pay?” Michael played along, his eyes sparkling.

 

“The sheer exhilaration of it beats out any kind of salary,” Jeremy explained obviously.

 

“Sounds incredible. I’m in. What would I do without you?” the dark haired man teased back. 

 

Fuck. Jeremy could only wish this was real. He thought that two months later, this feeling of wanting to get as close to Michael as possible, that desperation he felt that night would have gone away. It only seemed to increase the more he got these rare interactions with him. The worst thing, though, was that now that need for intimacy grew to not just physical. Jeremy wanted to know everything about Michael, wanted to see him in all his roles; a hard working employee, a flirty date, a passionate lover, a dedicated father. Wanted to comfort him in his lowest points, wanted to learn about his shaky past. Understand what makes him tick, his likes and dislikes. His desire to just know  expanded every time the universe granted him the opportunity to talk to Michael, brain clouding with _more, more, more_ .

 

Luckily, he was interrupted by his thoughts by more students lining up for a chance to play at his station, and his mind went back to hanging up those  _damn donuts._

________________________________________________________________________________

  
  


A grimacing, half-green face stared back at Jeremy through the bathroom mirror. He should have taken Brooke’s advice and gotten real make up remover instead of toughing it out with cold water and those cheap, thin paper towels in the dispenser. He glanced at his phone; it was now fifteen minutes since school got out, and approximately five minutes of hashing at his face to take off the seemingly permanent green. Luckily, the nose had been a surprisingly easy task; however, the residue of the face paint and glue was still prominent. 

  
  
  


“Come on,” Jeremy groaned, wincing as his hands created a painful friction on his face, rubbing away furiously. Even if he would be able to unveil the paint, it would just uncover a face of red blotches. He couldn’t decide which was worse. 

 

The door opened. Jeremy jumped, hoping it wasn’t one of his students. 

 

It was much worse.

“Oh my gosh, I thought nobody would be in here,” Michael said, hand still on the door handle. 

 

Jeremy wanted to die. Of fucking _course_ M ichael would show up, right now, when his pale face was now a combination of white, red, and green, with added streaks of dried glue to finish off the classy look. His hair was just as bad, all bunched up from being inside the witch hat all afternoon. He had shed most of his heavy layering for a T shirt and jeans. Definitely not professional, and  _definitely_ not what he wanted Michael to see. He let out a lame, incohesive grunt in response. _Leave it to good ol' Jeremy to make things awkward,_ he thought to himself with a scowl. 

 

“Do you..uh...want some help? You look like you’re struggling a little,” Michael suggested, his hand finally leaving the metal handle and making its way over to Jeremy. 

 

“No it’s fine, it’s just really difficult to get off,"  Jeremy explained through his teeth, eyes fixated on the ugly image in the mirror. Why was he so cranky? What a way to be in front of not only a parent of a student, but a ex-lover, too. 

 

“You’re gonna give yourself rug burn if you keep doing it like that,” Michael responded, grabbing a new paper towel from the dispenser and wetting it gently. He rolled up his dress shirt sleeves, exposing those wonderfully strong forearms. Jeremy tried not to think about those limbs lifting him up the bathroom so effortlessly while attacking his neck in kisses. “Can I?” Jeremy was knocked out of his quick reverie when Michael asked softly, hand raised inches away from Jeremy’s cheek. 

 

Jeremy turned his face away from his reflection to see Michael’s warm, soft eyes looking back into his colder ones. He nodded.

 

Slowly, Michael let his hand run down a thin cheekbone, dabbing away at the blotchy makeup with a gentleness Jeremy had never felt before. He looked back at Michael, whose eyes were fixated down onto his skin, tongue poking out in concentration. 

 

“Where’s Emmy?” Jeremy inquired with a shaky tone. He needed to distract his mind from this oddly intimate set up. 

 

“Rachel is having a party tonight, and her mom picked up a bunch of the girls after school,” the darker haired man explained, never fraying from the task at hand. “So I’m free for the night.”

 

“Oh,” Jeremy sighed out quietly. He resisted the urge to invite Michael over for their own kind of party.  _Get a grip, you horndog,_ he thought with shame. “Cool.”

 

A silence fell between them, the only sounds were Jeremy’s quick breathing and the paper towel slowly but surely erasing the color away. Michael’s hand was hot, Jeremy could feel it through the thin paper. He felt his own face flush. Jesus. 

 

As he moved his diligent hand to the other cheek, the arm that was at his side made its way to grab Jeremy’s shoulder. “Better leverage,” Michael explained shortly, fingers gripping Jeremy’s arm. 

 

The teacher closed his eyes and tried to be calm. _Chill. It's just a hand. Everyone has one of those._   He resisted the urge to move his own hands to touch Michael’s. He tried concentrating on how much smoother and better the towel felt this time around; nothing like the rough tugs of his own hand. The careful tenderness of Michael’s actions could almost lull him to sleep. It felt so good to have someone else show him attention, even if it was just to wipe off shitty makeup. 

 

Jeremy was so caught up in his own thoughts that he barely heard the sentence slip from Michael’s lips. “What?” he asked, ashamed at how shaky his voice was.

 

“I said you’re all good,” Michael repeated, his full lips turned upwards. “Witchiness be gone.”

 

Jeremy glanced at himself in the mirror; his face was cold from the tap water, but it was back to its normal pale color, save for the small bits around his neck and collarbone that he was glad Michael didn’t travel to. He raised his hands up to examine, groaning when he noticed the green tint. “Mind doing my hands, too?” he requested sheepishly. God, he was pathetic. 

 

Michael nodded, grabbing another piece from the roll and dabbing it in the sink. Jeremy laid his hands out, palms up, in front of the suited man. Michael stared at them at them a moment before taking one gingerly into his own, wiping away tenderly at the digits. 

 

Jeremy’s heart felt like it was beating a mile a minute. The desire to hold onto those big, soft hands was only increasing the more Michael swiped and dabbed at his own skinny, pale ones. He wanted to cry.  _Pathetic,_ he thought to himself.  _Acting like a child just for attention from a man who will never want you._

His subconscious was screaming at him to take his hands away, run as fast as he could out the door. To not dwell on the wonderfulness of being in Michael’s atmosphere, but to stray away. Forget what comfort felt like so he’d never know what he was missing. 

Still, his hands stayed. 

 

Jeremy’s eyes were glued to the tangle of palms and grips, becoming sadder as the green faded and the pale intermixed with tan. His pathetic reason of an excuse just to touch Michael was ending. Jeremy’s senses heightened, trying perilously to remember everything about this moment. 

 

“All good,” Michael repeated in a whisper, still holding onto Jeremy’s palms. His fingers ran over his skin feather light. Jeremy felt goosebumps rise. Both pairs of eyes were locked on the scene. Jeremy’s breath was leaving him fast, his eyes opening wider when one of those talented hands made its way up his left arm, touching softly. The only noise in the bathroom was the A.C. whirring above them and the mix of their inhales and exhales.

 

It was like a torturous thriller, Jeremy realized, as Michael continued his trek up his limb, painstakingly slow, as if asking permission. Brown and blue eyes were hooked on the action. Finally, he reached his shoulder again, his neck, rubbing softly before coming up to his face. The two reached each other’s eyes, Michael’s thumb brushing over Jeremy’s oh-so carefully. 

 

Jeremy felt like he was on fire, a blush coming from his neck and upwards towards the target spot. He grabbed onto the hand on his face, to keep him steady or something else completely he wasn’t sure. Anxious blue met nervous brown, until Jeremy couldn’t take it anymore, closing his eyes. If he didn’t look, nothing bad could happen, right?

 

Without his sight, the brunette’s other senses were much more heightened. He tried evening out his breathing, but Michael kept getting closer and closer, until he couldn’t tell whose breathing or heartbeats were whose.  _Kiss me,_ he thought, hoping somehow Michael would understand telepathy.

 

Michael must have, because only seconds later he felt the slightest feeling of plump lips on his own, ever so hesitantly. Jeremy breathed out, connecting their lips in what he’d been craving ever seen he foolishly said goodbye to him the first time. All the pent up frustration, anger, and self-doubt only made Jeremy grasp Michael’s wrist harder, push more deeply into his mouth. 

 

Michael’s arm that wasn’t connected to Jeremy’s face traveled to his waist, squeezing softly at his hip. Jeremy kept his other hand by his side. He didn’t want to ruin this by moving. Maybe it was all just a dream. 

 

Slowly, Michael pulled away, needing air. “Open your eyes?” Michael asked in a soft tone, hand pulling away from his body. 

 

Jeremy gripped his wrist impossibly tighter, keeping it pressed on his cheek. He shook his head. “If I do, that makes it real,” he responded in a whisper. “Just kiss me one more time. Please,” he begged softly, grateful for the darkness so he couldn’t see the emotion on Michael’s face. He couldn’t bear to see the disgust he knew was waiting for him if he opened his eyes. 

 

Ever obedient, Michael brought his lips back to Jeremy’s continuing his soft rubs on his bony cheekbone. The paler one took the lead, opening up those full lips to delve deeper, sucking on his tongue. He knew how desperate he was; grasping onto any of Michael that he could get. He realized this was short lived; he just couldn’t help but want  _more._

 

His bottom lip was taken by Michael’s who followed in his partner’s actions. The darker haired man took Jeremy’s loose hand into his empty one, leading it back to that thick patch of hair Jeremy missed touching. He ran his thin fingers through it tentatively, tugging sharply when Michael moaned into his mouth, biting at his lip in the best way. 

 

“God, you’re beautiful,” Michael breathed out against his mouth. 

 

They stood in silence for a moment, each keeping their stance as still as statues. Jeremy broke the quiet. “You should probably go,” he said, each word more incredibly painful after the other. He hand was still twirling Michael’s loose curls at his neck. He still refused his sight. 

 

Michael took back his arms in response, his warmth a noticeable, sad absence from Jeremy’s body. He quietly left, the door opening and closing quickly. 

 

Jeremy finally opened his eyes. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also quick psa i read and appreciate every single one of your kudos and comments they literally are the only reason I'm continuing my shit


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a headcanon that Jeremy is the lightest of the lightweights and you can pry it out of my cold dead hands

“Why would you do that? There’s only two minutes left!” Jeremy yelled at his TV screen in anxious frustration. He was currently curled up on his couch watching _The Great British Bake-Off,_ eyes peeled to the competition. Abandoned to-be-graded papers laid haphazardly on his coffee table, next to a half eaten box of pizza. Jeremy’s party animal ways were definitely starting to become a problem.

The doorbell rang. Jeremy groaned as he paused the action packed episode and stood up to answer the door, grabbing the bowl of candy sitting on his kitchen counter on the way. He could hear the muffled squeals through the door, and he smiled as he braced himself for the hyperactive adolescents just a few feet away.

“Trick or treat!” a trio consisting of a princess, pirate, and a weird goblin-dragon hybrid Jeremy wasn’t sure of exclaimed, hands reached out in anticipation.

The teacher laughed, dropping his hand into his prepared bowl. “You guys look great!” he complimented as he gave each pillowcase in front of him a generous handful.

“Thank you,” the princess answered back politely. The pirate and strange sci-fi creature (Jeremy still hadn’t made up his mind onto what it was) were already bouncing down the hallway towards the next apartment. “Bye!” she concluded briefly, quickly running after her friends.

“Have fun!” Jeremy waved with a shake of his head. He closed the door slowly, wishing to be interrupted again by another group of sugar filled children. He was hoping for any kind of distraction at this point.

He had always loved Halloween. Fond memories flooded his mind of meticulously mapping out his old childhood neighborhood in to get the best possible hunt, or charismatically manipulating his friends to trade his least favorites. Even when he had grown out the trick or treating, his love for the holiday still carried on. There was always a party to go to, alcohol to drink, and fun costumes to wear. There was never any conflict, always something for everyone to enjoy. A perfect day.

After the events of this Halloween, Jeremy wasn’t so sure he could regard it as highly anymore.

Falling back into the comfort of his couch, he pressed play on the show. However, his previous heated passion for the sophisticated baking had quickly faded. Why couldn’t he have continued to blindly watch delicious looking treats instead of focusing on his problems?

He groaned, shoving his face into a throw pillow, fighting in vain as his brain played back that scene from a few hours prior. He kissed Michael. Michael kissed him. Jeremy had done what he viliantly told himself not to. Being alone in the same room? Check. Allowing himself to fall trap to Michael’s pull? Check. Making out with a parent in the public bathroom? Check.

Freaking out and making things entirely more awkward than they needed to be? A Jeremy Heere speciality.

Jeremy wanted to scream. He didn’t understand why Michael had such a huge impact on him. Every interaction they’d had could be counted on one hand, but somehow Jeremy could not stop the images of him on repeat in his mind. They hadn’t even had a full conversation since that night at the bar, but the little snip bits that Jeremy had picked up in the last few months kept him hungry for more. He wanted to know what made Michael tick, his likes and dislikes. Wanted to explore every aspect of him; a hardworking employee, patient father, flirty date, passionate lover.

If only they had met under different circumstances. If only Jeremy wasn’t a blubbering idiot. Instead of a quick blowjob in a bathroom, it could have been more of that flirty conversation Jeremy craved and an exchange of numbers. If Jeremy had the balls and self confidence, they could’ve had more of those encounters, more moments of intimacy. Yet here he sat, stomach full of crappy pizza from down the street and mind too clouded with his personal issues to get work done.

Even if Jeremy was some sort of charismatic schmoozer like in his imagination, he was only one half of the equation. He lifted his head from the pillow, arms stretched out to the sides, eyes zoomed in on the popcorn ceiling. He knew Michael could never want him, regardless of the situation. Michael was successful, confident, beautiful...everything Jeremy was not. He could have anyone he wanted; why would a skinny elementary school teacher even cross his mind? He wasn’t special. He was just...Jeremy.

 _God, what am I? A fucking teen rom-com?_ He thought to himself with a disgusted scowl.  _jesus._ He shook his head as if to physically rid himself of those self deprecating thoughts. Maybe Rich was right; he did need to get laid. Preferably by someone not involved in education.

Jeremy glanced down at his phone, sitting idly alone next to the cardboard pizza box. He leaned over and grabbed it, quickly opening the app store and typing in ‘dating app’. If _The Great British Bake-Off_ couldn’t distract him, he knew of something else that might.

_____________________

 **Jeremy:** _This was such a bad idea._

 

  
Jeremy typed into his phone, sending it quickly. He raised his head, scanning the dark, crowded bar. His thigh moved up in down anxiously as he waited for a text back.

**Rich** : _youve done it before! Shouldnt be that hard_

 

Jeremy scoffed at Rich’s response.

 

 **Jeremy:** _yeah, look how well that turned out_

 **Rich** _: Confidence is key, my dude. TAKE ANOTHER SHOT_

 

 

Jeremy didn’t reply. Instead, he motioned the bartender over and downed another shot of the bitter liquid. He couldn’t tell if the warmness pooling in his stomach was from the alcohol or nerves.

It had been approximately two hours since he first started on his online dating excursion, and through a mix of sheer boredom and adrenaline he automatically agreed to go out with the first semi-decent guy that messaged him. Now, nervously fidgeting on the bar stool, he wasn’t so sure about his decision.

He let his eyes wander around the room. A blue color cast over the packed, noisy area. There were a few groups dressed up, and Jeremy could hear their laughter from his spot alone. A group of older men were playing pool near the front corner. The music was louder than typical. Crappy Dollar Store decorations were scattered lazily across the counter and walls, wrinkly looking pumpkins and bats with cartoonish grins. It was almost like they were mocking him.

He looked down at his phone for what felt like the millionth time since he got there and looked at this stranger’s profile once more. His name was Derek. His pictures showed him to have bright eyes, good hair, and a sturdy build. Most of his photos were of him in outdoorsy settings; camping, water skiing, snowboarding. A little too adventurous for Jeremy’s taste, but he wasn’t looking for a boyfriend. This mission was on an entirely different playing field.

 

 **Jeremy:** _He’s fifteen minutes late. I think he stood me up_

 **Rich:** _calm ur tits & stop worrying otherwise youll get all sweaty (dont even try to deny it i know u too well) _

**Rich** **_:_ ** _just pretend ur someone else_

 

It certainly felt like he was someone else already. Jeremy Heere six months ago would never have dared to do something like this. Then again, a lot had changed since then. Jeremy was furiously typing his reply when a dark voice startled him.

“Are you Jeremy?”

The nervous teacher shot his head up so fast he felt dizzy. Sure enough, Derek No-Last-Name was standing before him in all his toned glory, a blindingly white smile staring back at him.

“Yeah,” Jeremy breathed, smiling back weakly and holding out his hand to shake. He was surprised to feel big arms wrap around him instead. Was that what people did when they just met on the basis of a hookup? Good to know.

“Your photos really don’t do you justice,” Derek complimented, taking a seat on the stool next to Jeremy, smile still plastered on a plastic face.

“Thanks, and uh...you too. I mean, y-you are..uh..,” Jeremy stammered, using his hands to try and convey the thoughts that he couldn’t speak out.

Derek laughed. “You’re cute when you’re flustered. How about we get some drinks, yeah?”

Jeremy didn’t want to tell him he was already three drinks in, and nodded in agreement, hiding his shaky hands in his lap. He clanked his glass against his date’s, and quickly let it sink to the back of his throat.

He really didn’t know the protocol for this. Do they just go straight into the fucking? Or dance around some awkward conversation, knowing that both of them would rather skip the pleasantries?

“Have you ever done this before?” Jeremy was glad he chose someone so friendly. He didn’t know if he would be able to carry conversation without it.

“Yeah, all the time,” he lied, trying to ignore the unsettling feeling in his stomach. “You?”

The Ken doll laughed awkwardly, much to Jeremy’s dismay. “I may have dabbled before,” he rubbed his neck and looked down.

“Oh,” Jeremy responded lamely, joining his pair of eyes to the view of the dirty floor.

Quickly, Derek started going off on a tangent about some football game that happened last week and how it was  _so unfair_ that this team did this and that, and Jeremy started to zone out. He looked behind that muscular shoulder. God, this was such a bad idea.

“Wanna go outside for a little bit? It’s so claustrophobic in here,” Derek suggested, taking Jeremy out of his reverie and standing up. Jeremy nodded, his mind starting to get that familiar fuzz that alcohol brought with it. He followed out the door and into the empty alleyway. It was cold and bitter, the nice New Jersey fall weather was starting to fade into that familiar biting winter.

Derek leaned against the brick, obviously not bothered by the change in temperature in a thin college sweatshirt and cropped jeans. “Do you smoke?” he asked Jeremy, already pulling out a joint and a white lighter.

“I did it a little in high school,” Jeremy confessed. Derek held out another for him to take. He debated briefly before deciding that if he was gonna go through with this, he might as well take all the high he could get. He leaned forward, allowing his date to light it up from his mouth.

Leaning against the wall next to him, Jeremy closed his eyes, breathing in that nostalgic smoke and letting it fill his lungs. It was almost comforting; brought him back to times of easiness, when the world seemed such much more bright. Everything that seemed like a challenge was so trivial to him now. That was the trick with nostalgia, though; it always left out the hard parts.

“Fuck, I forgot how good this feels,” Jeremy commented, a lazy grin stretching from his mouth. He let himself take another drag.

“I have the hookup with the good shit,” Derek bragged, but Jeremy really wouldn’t be able to tell the difference at this point. Derek smelled commercially good, like how a action movie heartthrob should. Like classic Old Spice.

They continued taking hits silently. The Abercrombie scent took over more and more of Jeremy’s senses as the high started to cloud over his brain, mixing with his earlier endeavors to create a cake of shallow goodness. He felt Derek’s arm touch his, getting closer and closer after each breath of smoke.

Jeremy didn’t know if his eyes were lidded because of the high or how Derek’s face was getting increasingly closer to his. The anticipation was too much, and Jeremy’s mind was too full of chemical imbalances. He took his empty hand and raised it to the other man’s head, crashing their lips together.

It wasn’t a clean kiss; it was messy and unsynchronized, as if they were both desperately searching for a connection that simply wasn’t there. Jeremy blocked out the voices in his head that screamed at him and only deepened his kiss, tightening his grip on the honey blonde hair in his grasp.

Jeremy dropped the rest of his joint on the ground, and had enough sober intelligence to stomp it out with his foot. Somehow Derek made his way to trap him between two strong elbows, hands on the cool wall to balance. They kept their frantic kissing for a while, until Jeremy felt hips rutting back into his. He gasped, taking quick breaths as Derek’s hands made hasty work against his belt, mouth attached to his pale neck.

The moment Derek’s hand grazed his dick through his boxers, Jeremy’s eyes flashed open.

“Stop,” he spoke out hoarsely. Derek wasn’t listening, either too high or too horny to care. _What the hell are you thinking?_ Jeremy’s inner voice yelled out in defense. _You have a hot man with a hot dick right in front of you._ He couldn’t handle this. There was so much happening, his mind was too clouded. The contrast between the cold air and the hot heat of another person on him was too intense. He hated how he couldn’t think clearly. This was all happening too fast.

“Stop!” Jeremy exclaimed, using all his strength to push away the taller man. Two feet distance away, they both were breathing heavily, equally as confused as each other.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Derek shot back, bewilderment churning into annoyance.

“I don’t know! Just..give me a second, okay?” Jeremy yelled, placing his hands on his knees and head facing the cement. Everything felt off, like he was a video game character in a glitch.

Derek responded by taking one big step towards Jeremy again, latching his mouth back onto his neck and frozen hands raking up his sides underneath his shirt. “Just relax okay?”

Jeremy gasped. “Derek, please! Just..fucking leave me alone, okay?” he pushed him off again, stepping away from the wall and back towards the street. “Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Wrong with me?” Derek accused, face distorting into anger. “You’re the one who agreed to meet with me, sending me all these mixed messages now? Not to mention you’re the one who kissed me! I gave you fucking free weed! What the fuck?”

Jeremy spun in a circle, not knowing what to do. Everything felt muddled. “Fuck, I don't know what I was thinking, okay!? I didn’t know...I don’t know,” he trailed off, eyes prickling with tears. Fuck. He was  _not_ going to cry in front of this douche bag.

“You’re such a fucking tease, bitch!” Derek screamed back as Jeremy felt his legs start moving towards the street, leaving the plastic supermodel alone in the darkened alley.

Jeremy didn’t even realize he’d reached the main sidewalk until he heard cars racing past and the patterned bass humming through the door of the bar. Groups of people passed by while Jeremy stood in the middle of the sidewalk, not exactly knowing what to do. He spun around once more, hands threading through his hair. He felt out of his mind.

 _Focus, Jeremy,_ he told himself, trying to steady his breathing.  _Just call Rich. He'll come pick you up, everything will be fine._ As he focused enough to start walking towards the curb and pulling out his phone, he bumped into a hard mass of a body. “S-sorry,” he mumbled, steadying his footing as best he could.

“Jeremy?”

“What?” Jeremy sounded exasperated, still not looking up at the stranger calling his name. Wait. Someone was calling his name. “Oh my god,” Jeremy groaned, looking up to see the exact person he _definitely_ want to interact with tonight.

“Are you okay? You don’t look so well,” Michael commented with concerned eyes, lifting up Jeremy’s arm with his own to steady him.

“Are you following me or something?” Jeremy asked slowly. He tried focusing his eyes on the man before him, but the background images of people brushing into him in the center of the street, along with the noises of the night kept him in a puzzled state.

“No, I was just walking back to my house,” Michael explained, gesturing to a plastic bag in his hand. “I ran out of Halloween candy.”

Jeremy walked backwards, quickly turning into an unsteady jog. He wanted to close his eyes and go to bed. He didn’t really know where he was going; he just knew he had to get out of there.

“Jeremy! Wait!” he heard Michael call after him, but he kept going.

He didn’t know how far he had gone until he felt his hands collide with the cement, his face inches from the cold ground. Shit. As if being absolutely cross faded in front of Michael was bad enough, he had to eat shit, too.

“Shit” Jeremy grumbled, sitting down on the sidewalk, long legs tangled between one another.

“Are you okay?” Michael had caught up with him, bending down and unconsciously grabbing his arm protectly.

“‘M fine,” Jeremy spoke in a mumble, eyes refusing to look up at Michael. Suddenly the tiny forests in the sidewalk cracks seemed so interesting. He felt a hand touch his cheek. It was much warmer than Derek’s, so much more comfortable. He leaned into it, lazily bringing his eyes to meet Michael’s.

“Where are your friends?”

“I came here on a date, but it’s over now,” Jeremy explained dumbly, his mind too slow.

Michael didn’t reply for a while, just staring at him. “Jeremy, are you high?”

Well, shit. As if making out with him wasn’t bad enough, Jeremy was now a drug-addicted slut in Michael’s mind now. He bet he would call the school, have him fired for being such an irresponsible example. Jeremy let a few tears pool over, cascading over his cheeks. Fuck. He nodded in disgust, eyes shutting in preparation of the discipline he was going to face.

Instead, he was greeted with that familiar, lovely laugh of Michael’s. It fell over him like a security blanket, allowing him to defrost. He opened his watery eyes to find Michael’s wide grin warmly spreading over his face. Jeremy couldn’t help but join in. The situation was pretty comical; Jeremy trying and failing at a hookup, getting fucked up, and _still_ running into Michael. The coincidence was almost stereotypical.

They sat there on the sidewalk, knees touching knees. Michael had dropped his hand to his own lap now, giggling maniacally. Jeremy wasn’t sure if he was laughing at himself or because of the miraculous melody of Michael’s chuckle.

“Do you like pancakes?” Michael spoke once his breathing was back under control.

Jeremy looked up at him, brown eyes twinkling with mischief and fun. What the hell. “Yeah.”

______________________

The pair found themselves at a diner about a block way, in which Michael had insisted had “the best pancakes in all of New Jersey”. It was empty save for an elderly man in the back and a group of teens. They sat in a booth away from the door. The waitress had just left after taking their orders.

“This was a really good idea,” Jeremy said, his filter gone due to the alcohol and weed. He was trying to stay cool and collected as much as he could.

Michael chuckled. “Breakfast food is _always_ a good idea. Even at,” he glanced down at his watch, “11:03.”

Jeremy’s eyes didn’t meet his smile. He knew after this that there would be consequences. “I uh..I want you to know that I don’t normally do things like this,” he started shakily.

“What do you mean?” Michael asked, eyes going wide with concern.

“I mean, like...getting high and drunk.I know like half of the times we’ve seen each other I’ve been like that so I probably don’t sound very convincing but it’s not a common thing. For me,” Jeremy said quickly.

“Why would what I think matter?”

“Because I’m your daughter’s teacher and all,” Jeremy explained, hands going back to their habitual spot messing with his sweater. “I don’t want you to think any less of me. I promise I’m not doing any of...this...at work,” he said sincerely as possible, swallowing the lump in his throat. He was hoping his intoxicated apology would somehow get Michael to keep his mouth shut.

“Jeremy,” Michael started, making said man’s heart flutter. “I’ve seen you with my daughter. I know that you’re not this wild at work. And if you’re worried about me telling or anything, your secret’s safe with me.”

It was like he read his mind. “Really?”

“Of course. You have a life outside of school. I can respect that,” Michael stated, a closed lipped smile looking back at him.

“Oh god,” Jeremy groaned, putting his hands on the table and placing his head in them. “Why are you so perfect?” he grumbled underneath his limbs. Sober Jeremy was going to regret this in the morning.

Michael laughed. “I could say the same about you.”

Jeremy felt his heart flutter. Lifting his head he spoke, “Yeah okay. I’m a grown ass adult who hooks up with frat boys and watches baking shows for fun.”

“And I’m a recently out-of-the-closet divorced father who blames himself for how fucked up he made his family,” Michael looked down, as if realizing he said too much. “Not so perfect, now, huh?”

Jeremy looked up, now sitting up ramrod straight. He cocked his head in surprise. He was definitely not expecting a declaration from Michael tonight, especially one of that proportion. He hated how uncomfortable he felt about it; he had no idea what to say or think.  
“My mom left when I was sixteen. I remember hating her for leaving, and hating my dad for not knowing how to cope. I was in such a bad place for a long time,” Jeremy had no idea why he was telling Michael this, or even where this story was going. “But we got through it. My dad learned how to take care of himself and be a better father, and I got a fantastic relationship with him because of it, stronger than it ever would have been if my mom stayed. I don’t really know why she left, or who’s fault it was, really. But I can’t really regret any of it, because of all the good stuff that came out of it.” Jeremy took a deep breath before continuing. “I guess sixteen year old me could never have seen how anything decent could’ve come from the worst thing to ever happen to him, but looking at it from a new perspective made me realize how much I was able to grow and learn from it. My life would be so much different if it wasn’t for that. I don’t even know how much I would’ve missed out on.

“So maybe the angry, confused stage is where you’re at right now. And that’s okay! But from experience, I can assure you that this happened for a reason, for something better. Maybe,” Jeremy trailed off. “Or not. Sorry, I don’t know why I did that. I’m really the last person who should be giving advice right now,” he flushed red and took his hand back, his mind reeling from the touch.

“You’re wrong,” Michael stated in a quiet tone.

“What?”

“When you denied it earlier. You’re pretty fucking perfect to me,” Michael said evenly, eyes never faltering from Jeremy’s blue ones.

Jeremy wanted to jump out of his seat, but he wasn’t sure if he’d go straight into Michael’s arms or bolt out the door. “You’re pretty fucking perfect to me, too.”

As if on cue, Jeremy’s stomach grumbled. Loudly. Jeremy blushed even further as Michael laughed, the serious moment between them gone. “Sorry,” Jeremy apologized embarrassedly.

“Good thing pancakes are on the way,” Michael responded, that bright smile that Jeremy adored so much back at its rightful spot on those full lips.

Jeremy smiled, eyes drifting away. He was so fucked.

___________________

  
Thirty minutes later and bellies full of carb loaded goodness, Jeremy was feeling a lot better. Most of his high was gone, and the food took over the alcoholic feeling. Even sobering up, he couldn’t bring himself to feel bad about his current situation.

He was still sitting in that worn booth, mind and body completely focused on Michael. He was in the middle of telling a story, something about college hijinks, and Jeremy couldn’t look away. Those dark eyes were bright and expressive, even behind black frames. His tan hands mgrated all over the place expressively. Lips moved the speed of light, trying to get every detail in. Jeremy was mesmerized, completely addicted.

“So did you get in trouble?” Jeremy asked excitedly as Michael reached the end of his tale.

“Nope. Never got caught. And good ol’ Professor Edwards never suspected me,” he grinned wolfishly, finishing his final bite of his flapjack.

“I have to admit, that is pretty incredible,” Jeremy laughed and shook his head.

“Have my stories of perilous adventuring made you feel better?” Michael inquired.

Jeremy nodded. “Thanks. For that, and the food. And the company.”

They split the check per Jeremy’s insistence, grabbing their coats and heading back outside. Jeremy walked as if he had bricks for feet; he knew once they left the comfort of the diner, he would have to go back and face reality; his hopeless crush on Michael only grew in the last hour and he couldn’t do anything about it. Now he’d just have another encounter to regret in bed tonight.

“That was definitely not how I intended on spending my Halloween night,” Michael spoke up, fisting his hands into his pockets once they were outside. “But I’m glad my night got interrupted. I had fun.”

Jeremy felt his heart drop. “Me, too. Thanks for not laughing at me when I fell over, by the way.”

“Oh, trust me, it was very hard not to,” Michael grinned. “I had to hold back to make sure you were okay.”

Jeremy rolled his eyes and snorted. “Wow, thanks,” he deadpanned and suppressed his smile.  
“I guess I’ll see you around school and stuff,” Michael shuffled his feet awkwardly. They both knew that a goodbye was imminent.

“Yeah,” Jeremy breathed out. “Have a good night,” his breath was palpable in the brisk night air.

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

Jeremy turned as slow as a turtle, and starting walking back towards his own apartment. The route was a little too long to walk normally, but he figured he needed to clear his head.

“Jeremy, what are we doing?” Michael called after him.

Jeremy stopped. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly, back still to the other man.

“I know you probably don’t want to hear this,” Michael kept talking. Jeremy could tell he was still stuck in that same spot; he wasn’t coming closer. “I can’t stop thinking about you. I don’t know what to do about it. I just..can you just tell me to stop so I finally have a good reason to?”

Jeremy sighed, feeling his heart drop to his stomach. “You can’t stop thinking about me?” He turned around, but kept his footing. Only three feet of sidewalk kept them apart.

Michael shook his head. “I know, I know. You told me not to, that nothing was happening. But, fuck, Jeremy. How can I? I’m pathetic, I know. I realize you already moved on, understandably so, going on dates and stuff. I just..I don’t know why I even said anything. I thought maybe you felt it, too,” Michael had started out so strongly, but his insecurities quickly began to show. “Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. Let’s just forget I said anything.” It was his turn to start walking away.

“Michael, wait!” Jeremy called out. He wanted to move, but his feet were frozen. He was on the fence between wanting to run to him and run away. “This kind of thing hasn’t happened to me before. I’m scared, really fucking scared,” he sighed quickly, swallowing his fear. “It’s just so complicated, you know? I’m afraid of what will happen. There’s no protocol for this.”

Michael turned around, stepping towards him. “Tell me to stop,” he demanded, moving his feet torturously slow.  
Jeremy stayed silent, until they were chest to chest, feet pointed at each other. He felt brave, keeping his scared eyes on Michael’s the closer Michael got.

“Tell me to stop,” Michael repeated in a whisper, face inching closer and closer to Jeremy’s.

Jeremy let his eyes flutter close, waiting for what he’d been wanting for months. It felt like years before soft lips brushed his experimentally. Jeremy couldn’t stand how careful this was, and took initiative to press his own lips harder against his partner’s, tongue dipping out to pry open those full lips. Michael obliged, arms wrapping around Jeremy’s thin waist desperately. Jeremy pulled away to breathe, giving away to the temptation to run pale fingers through thick dark hair. Pulling lightly on the strands, he brought that irresistible mouth back to his. He let out a quiet whimper when Michael’s tongue ran over the roof of his mouth, thumbs rubbing rhythmic circles on his hip bones.

Jeremy felt like a starving man feasting. All his pent up anger, frustration, confusion, and lust scrambled together in his mind to lead to frantic and desperate kisses, never feeling close enough, never feeling as good as he knew he could. The raw hormones coursing through him led him to feel bold.

“Take me to your house.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;)


	6. Chapter 6

“This is me,” Michael declared, gesturing towards the house on their left. Jeremy couldn’t see many of the details in the dark, but could still make out the bigger picture. It was a small, plain home, with brick stairs leading up to a long porch. He could see a pink bike leaning against the white railing. 

 

Michael led them up the small walkway and up the stairs. It felt like an eternity before he was able to find his keys and jimmy them into the door, giving Jeremy too much time to let his anxiety take over. His mind zeroed in on the bicycle staring at him from three feet away, reminding him just exactly the position they were in.  _ This is so fucked up,  _ Jeremy thought. 

 

But as Michael opened the door and looked back at him with that dreamy smirk, he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

 

Jeremy barely had time to look around Michael’s house before he was promptly pressed against the front door. Every part of Michael was taking over his senses; Michael’s mouth on his, Michael’s hands making trails over his chest, Michael’s thigh wedged in between his legs. He relaxed into his mouth,  hands giving into the temptation to make a home in those dark locks. God, it was  _ sinful _ to feel this good only from a kiss. 

 

“Not gonna give me a tour?” Jeremy teased breathlessly as Michael’s glorious lips made a pit stop at his jaw to suck on the light, sensitive skin. 

 

“Later,” Michael murmured shortly, big hands grabbing onto the smaller man’s ass, lifting him up. “But I’ll give you a sneak peak of the bedroom.”

 

Jeremy wrapped his legs around Michael’s waist. After a few more moments of breathless kisses, Jeremy felt his back leaving the cool wood of the door. “Are you sure you can lift m- AHH!” Jeremy’s worry was stopped as he felt himself tilt and fall out of Michael’s grasp, tangle of limbs landing on the floor with a hard fall. 

 

“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry,” Michael said from his standing position above him, trying to hide his giggling. 

 

Jeremy couldn’t help but laugh. “I  _ thought _ my ass was gonna be sore for a whole different reason tonight,” he joked, lifting his arms for Michael to take. 

 

Michael obliged, grabbing his thin arms and lifting him so seamlessly it seemed like the last thirty seconds didn’t even happen. “That was not part of my plan, I promise.”

“I’m sure you say that to all the girls,” Jeremy deadpanned as their hands went back to their previous places on hips and hair. 

 

“It was supposed to be a romantic gesture,” Michael made his body flush with Jeremy’s once more. “But I’m obviously not as strong as I thought.” 

 

“You’re really making this as least sexy as possible,” Jeremy bantered back, capturing Michael’s mouth in a deep kiss. He was tired of talking. “You were saying something about a bedroom?” Jeremy diverted the conversation. He didn’t come over here to do more shallow flirting. They’d beaten around the bush long enough. 

 

Michael answered with a groan. “You’re gonna be the death of me, I swear.” He took one of Jeremy’s hands from his neck and locked their fingers, leading him towards a hallway. Michael turned the light with his spare hand, trying not to trip as he walked backwards.

 

“You know, you can turn around,” Jeremy chuckled as Michael tripped over his own feet. 

 

“But then I wouldn’t be able to look at you,” Michael gave him a goofy smile, squeezing his hand and bringing it to his mouth for a kiss.

 

_ Sweet Jesus. _ Jeremy wanted to melt right there. “Sap,” he mumbled, stopping as Michael opened the door to the bedroom. 

 

Michael opened the door wide enough for both of them to go through, allowing Jeremy to walk towards the middle. A big bed sat as the centerpiece, with a matching set of nightstands. A window was placed on the left next to a small closet. It was overall a modest bedroom, but Jeremy again wasn’t given much chance to analyze it.

 

Michael wrapped his arms around Jeremy from behind, his lips making there way up Jeremy’s long neck. “It’s hot in here, no?” he mumbled against fair skin. “Maybe we should take off some layers.”

 

“Hmm you might be on to something there,” Jeremy agreed, allowing tan arms to shed his jacket, leaving him in is collared shirt and jeans. Turning around to face Michael, he copied his moments. Jeremy kicked off his shoes as fast as he could before Michael embraced him again, haphazardly throwing them both on the bed.

 

“That was graceful,” Jeremy laughed, opening his legs for Michael’s to lay in as he was caged in by dark elbows. They looked at each other, faces centimeters apart, for approximately five seconds before Jeremy couldn’t take the suspense. He grabbed his face with both hands, craving the addictive softness of Michael’s lips. He ran one hand through his hair, pulling lightly while his other thumb brushed the stubble on Michael’s cheek. Michael groaned softly, tongue pushing against Jeremy's mouth. Jeremy sighed and sucked on it, grasping at the strands even tighter. 

 

Pulling up for air, Michael’s mouth migrated back to his neck, where a half-assed, tiny mark could be seen from earlier on his jaw. He clamped onto the left side, running  his tongue over it to soothe the bites.

 

“Did you plan on getting laid tonight, or do you always make your bed? Because that’s pretty impressive,” Jeremy gasped out embarrassingly breathlessly and tried to distract himself from bucking up against Michael’s thigh. 

 

Michael ignored him, hand making its way to pull up on Jeremy’s shirt. “Off, please.” 

 

Jeremy obeyed, sitting up slightly and taking back his hands to undo the stubborn buttons. He was so occupied with his own trembling fingers that he almost missed the glorious sight of Michael ripping his own T-shirt off his head. “Oh,  _ fuck,  _ Michael,” Jeremy groaned, hands resting on the final two buttons. 

 

Michal was on his knees, sideways to Jeremy, and turned his head to give him another trademark grin. Jeremy couldn’t move his gaze from the broad expanse of smooth, dark skin that was just  _ begging  _ to be kissed. From his angle, Jeremy could see a glimpse of a strong back, tensing from Jeremy’s intense stare. A tiny tummy had the perfect amount of softness that Jeremy couldn’t wait to get his hands on. 

 

“You have back dimples,” Jeremy pointed out with a smile, sitting up to touch the irresistible display just inches from him. He ran his fingers over the small of his back, loving the way it felt, like a mixture of smooth callousness. 

 

“And you still have too many clothes on,” Michael countered, a faint blush creeping over his cheeks at the attention. He turned to face Jeremy and undid the rest of the buttons, hurriedly sliding off his shoulders, leaving them both shirtless. 

 

Jeremy rushed to kiss him, hands making a steady mission to everywhere on Michael’s chest. Fingers tweaking a nipple, pushing further down to squeeze at his supple sides. He would much rather Michael be distracted by his attention to pay any to Jeremy.

 

Jeremy flinched as a tender hand caressed his cheek softly, while the other gently swooped down to a bony hip. He wanted to make excuses, say sorry for how much of a dissapointment his reveal was when Michael was so much more endearing. He knew his body wasn’t the strongest, wasn’t the perfect shade. He remembered spending hours of life scowling in front of a mirror and the sheer inferiority of his body. Too tall, too thin, too pale. 

 

But then Michael’s held him like he’s some sort of prized porcelain doll, kissing him like he’s been waiting years to, and he couldn’t think about his insecurities anymore. 

 

They continued like that for a few minutes, familiarizing themselves with each other’s bodies and barely disconnecting their mouths until breathing became a necessity. Jeremy was learning a lot about Michael through his touches. When Jeremy would linger on his nipples, running them through his fingers until they were hard, Michael gasped the loudest and his hands would tighten on Jeremy’s sides. Everytime Michael’s fingers brushed over the band of his jeans ever so lightly, Jeremy moaned, savoring the suspense. 

 

It took all of Jeremy’s willpower to tear his mouth from Michael’s, but as much as he loved sucking face, he was looking for a something a little more unfamiliar. He kissed down Michael’s neck, taking his time as he pushed Michael down and threw his legs around him. His mouth left a hungry trail down his chest, stopping to lick at the hardened nipples, and grinning against the dark skin when Michael moaned quietly. 

 

“You’re such a tease,” Michael breathed through gritted teeth, bucking up against Jeremy. The action caused heated sighs from both of the men. 

 

Jeremy finally reached Michael’s stomach, sucking and biting at the softness there. He ran his hands over his upper body again, never getting enough of the warm feeling. He glanced up at Michael, whose head was against the pillows, chest moving up and down quickly as he tried to maintain some sort of balanced breathing. The smaller tugged at the jeans in front of him, a silent question. 

 

Michael didn’t answer verbally, he simply nodded, fidgeting and moving around on his back until Jeremy managed to get his pants and boxers off, leaving him completely exposed, cock rock hard and on display. 

 

“ _ Fuck, _ ” Jeremy breathed once he found his way back between Michael’s spread thighs. It may not have been his first time seeing Michael’s cock, but it sure as hell felt like it. THeir first time had been hurried and rushed, too focused on reaching the final goal that they couldn’t appreciate details along the way. And Michael’s dick was a detail Jeremy wanted extensive knowledge on. 

Part of him wanted to tease Michael moore, to create a mindless path up and down his legs, press and squeeze at his thighs, leave marks and bruises that he could discover tomorrow. Part of him also wanted to get his mouth on him as soon as possible. 

 

Patience was a virtue Jeremy simply didn’t have. 

 

He sunk down even further, mouth agape as he drew a confident lick from the base to the tip. He felt Michael shudder. “Jesus, a-a little warning would be nice?” Michael asked, voice faltering.

 

“Michael? I’m going to suck your dick now,” Jeremy answered flatly. As fast as he had stated it, his mouth was back to its prime focus. Taking the tip in slowly, he let himself get adjusted, bringing a hand from Michael’s thigh to cup his balls gently. Inch by inch he swallowed more, encouraged by the little sighs and groans coming from above him. He lapped his tongue at the tip and let it sink down his throat, sucking and licking obscenely. By now, Jeremy’s hand had left Michael’s member and gone to give his own cock some sort of friction. He was still in the uncomfortable confines of his jeans, by the touch alone was enough to make him moan.

 

“Shit, Jer,” Michael moaned at the sight before him; Jeremy with a flushed face and neck littered with darkening bruises, obediently pleasuring Michael like he was born to do it, and liking it so much that it turned  _ him  _ on, too. He brought his fingers to run through Jeremy’s hair to ground himself, trying not to pull too hard. “You’re so fucking good.”

 

Jeremy whimpered both at the nickname and praise, the vibrations on Michael’s cock forcing him to buck his hips further into that hot, wet heat. “Shit, I’m sorry,” Michael apologized with labored breath. Jeremy responded by only adjusting deeper, the hand not on his dick going to rub at Michael’s hip. 

 

Jeremy looked up at Michael so wantonly, eyes glazed over in desire that it was no surprise when the latter gave in to the feeling, fucking into the Jeremy’s mouth. “God, you look so gorgeous with my cock down your throat, baby,” Michael spilled out lustfully, too far gone to care about a filter. Jeremy took a deep breath through his nose, trying to focus on not gagging as Michael’s hips bucked into his face. “Jeremy...I-I’m close…,” Michael blurted out.

 

Just as quickly as he had started, Jeremy ripped away his mouth. “Don’t come yet,” he said, ashamed at how hoarse his voice was. “You have to fuck me first.”

“You’re killing me,” Michael groaned, leaning his head back against the pillows. Jeremy made quick work of the rest of his clothes, trying to shuck them off rapidly before Michael could get a good look. As he made his way back to Michael’s mouth, he felt a hand touch his shoulder gently. “Wait, wait. I wanna see you,” Michael whispered, leaning up on his elbows and letting his eyes roam lazily over Jeremy’s form. 

 

Jeremy felt a blush creeping up from his neck, and looked away from the man under him. He gasped as Michael sat up, grabbing onto Jeremy’s bare ass and grinding his hips against him. “You’re gorgeous,” Michael complimented after seeing Jeremy’s head roll back at the feeling of their bare cocks against one another. 

 

Jeremy felt overwhelmed already. He moaned as Michael continued his assault on his neck, continuing adding to the collection while still mercilessly bucking up his hips to meet Jeremy’s. Adding the feeling with the endearing words spilling out of those full lips he loved to kiss, and Jeremy couldn’t handle it. His dick was so maddingly hard is almost hurt. He needed more. 

 

As if Michael read his mind, he leaned on his his arms over to the bedside table, fishing out a bottle of lube and a condom. Jeremy let his eyes close, savoring the feeling on Michael under him. He couldn’t count how many times he’d imagined this, dreamed about this, in the dark alone with his hand. All he knew for that was  _ nothing _ compared to the real thing. 

 

Suddenly, Jeremy could feel a lube-covered finger at his entrance, poking hesitantly. Jeremy nodded, giving Michael the green light to start prepping him. He exhaled shakily, trying to stable his labored breaths as Michael began to explore him ever so gently. 

 

“More,” Jeremy grumbled out after a few minutes of the single digit opening him up. He clamped onto Michael’s neck, kissing and sucking at the flushed skin. 

 

Michael obeyed, adding in another finger, slowly scissoring and prodding inside his hole. Jeremy ground down on his fingers, searching for more, more, mo-

 

“Oh,  _ fuck _ ,” Jeremy cursed when Michael’s fingers grazed over his prostate. He could feel Michael grin against his shoulder. 

 

“Good?” Michael murmured, kissing a quick closed mouthed peck to the pale skin in front of him. Jeremy only whimpered in response, hands tightening around Michael’s neck, helplessly pushing down on his talented hand. “You’re doing so good, so good for me. You look stunning like this, you ride my fingers so pretty,” Michael ranted, much to Jeremy’s delight. He let in another, stretching him out. Removing his hand from Jeremy’s side, he grasped Jeremy’s dripping cock. “Just a little bit more, baby.”

 

Jeremy was in absolute bliss, his stomach pleasantly coiling up into a pool of warm tension. He couldn’t help but let out consistent strings of wrecked groans and broken whimpers. It just felt so goddamn  _ good _ and it had been so long for him. Michael’s words played like a broken record in his mind. He never thought he was into dirty talk. Then again, Michael was breaking all his rules. 

 

“Michael, please,” Jeremy gasped out, hands gripping strong, thick shoulders. 

 

“You ready?” Michael asked to reassure, and with Jeremy’s frantic nod, he flipped them over, breaking open the condom and lubing up his dick. Jeremy spread his limbs, arms reaching to grasp at the sheets while legs lay like an open canvas for Michael. 

 

Ever so carefully, Michael draped himself over Jeremy, practically enclosing his thin frame. Jeremy closed his eyes, letting himself bask in the feeling of warm safety as Michael lined his cock up with his entrance. Torturously slow, Jeremy could feel himself being filled up. He almost forgot how overpowering and how  _ much _ it felt to take in. 

 

“Breathe,” Michael reminded him in a whisper, running a hand through Jeremy’s sweaty hair and keeping his fingers on his cheek. Jeremy obeyed, letting out a breath he wasn’t even aware he was holding in, as Michael bottomed out. He looked up into those inviting brown eyes with his own watery ones, trying to hold himself together. “You’re just so tight,” Michael ran his thumb along his jawline, lowering his face down to connect their lips again. 

 

Jeremy let himself go inside Michael’s mouth, letting out a moan when Michael sucked on his bottom lip. He clenched around him, causing Michael to thrust into him. “Move,” Jeremy demanded evenly.

 

“Shit, Jer,” Michael gasped, pulling out so only the tip was connected, then thrust back into him intensely. They continued like that for a few moments, adjusting to one another, until Michael came in at a different angle and pushed against his prostate directly. 

 

“Oh, God,” Jeremy moaned, running his short nails down the soft broad planes of Michael’s spine. “That’s perfect.”

 

He opened his eyes to see Michael wiping away a stray tear on his cheek, running his thumb over his lips with eyes full of way too much admiration that Jeremy could handle. Keeping his blue eyes on Michael’s, he took the thumb into his mouth, sucking and licking passionately.

 

“Fuck,” Michael said, eyes transfixed on the sight before him. Jeremy, face wet with tears and sweat, flushed skin decorated in red hickeys, eyes half lidded, whimpers and moans escaping his full mouth as Michael kept thrusting into him. He took his finger back, bringing his hand down to massage Jeremy in fast, tight strokes.

 

Jeremy left his mouth open, arms grasping at Michael’s slick skin. He wasn’t gonna be able to last much longer with Michael touching him like that, hand on his dick and cock buried deep inside of him, hitting his pleasure spot every time. He let his eyes close, wrapping his legs around Michael’s waist. “‘M close,” Jeremy barely let out in pants. 

 

“Come on, Jer.” Jeremy moaned at the use of the nickname again. He’d been called that before, but it never felt like it mattered until now. Michael’s thrusts were becoming more and more erratic. “Come for me, baby.”

 

With that short statement, Jeremy felt the tension in his stomach snap,  shooting over Michael’s hand and his stomach. The darker man stroked him through his orgasm, kissing him until he batted his hand away from overstimulation. Michael wasn’t that far behind, and Jeremy used the little strength he had left to buck up into his thrusts. Jeremy grabbed his face, kissing him deeply when his hips froze. He swallowed Michael’s moan as he came down from his own high. 

 

They just laid there for several minutes, Michael’s arms failing him and he collapsing on Jeremy. Pants and shuffling filled the room, as Jeremy’s fingers ran through Michael’s hair comfortingly. Once their heads were back to reality, Michael reluctantly got up and pulled out, discarding the condom into the bathroom connected to the room. 

 

At his absence, Jeremy laid on his back, trying to wrap his head around what just happened. He and Michael had sex. Michael and him...had sex. Five minutes ago, they were in the process of having sex. He wasn’t sure if he should freak out or bask in it. He sat up, looking at his discarded underwear, clearly stained.  _ Great _ , Jeremy thought with a grimace.  _ As if the walk of shame was bad enough.  _

 

“Want a clean pair?” Michael asked from behind him. Jeremy turned around quick enough to see him toss him a new pair. Jeremy couldn’t help but stare at Michael. He just looked unfairly handsome, leaning against the doorframe, just in boxers. His hair was disheveled in the best way, skin bright from their previous activities. 

He suddenly felt very insecure. He wished he could look like Michael. All soft skin, broad shoulders, skin easy to hold on to. All he could give Michael was six feet of blindingly white bones. He put on the underwear lightning fast, the absence of arousal making him keenly aware just how exposed he was. 

 

Luckily, Michael didn’t say anything about it. Instead, he ripped off the top sheet where Jeremy was sitting, and collapsed face first into the mattress. Jeremy laughed and started to put on his pants.

 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing?” Michael asked shyly, raising his face to put in his hands. 

 

“Putting on pants?” Jeremy answered in a shaky question, eyes wide with anxiety. Was this not what you were supposed to do after a hook-up? Wait, was this even a hook-up? Jeremy wasn’t sure if they ever specified. 

 

“Are you leaving?” Michael sounded disappointed. Jeremy stopped in his tracks. 

 

“Do you want me to leave?”

 

“Not really, no.”

 

“Oh.” Jeremy really didn’t know what to say. In the back of his mind, he knew this probably wasn’t a good idea. But when he looked at Michael’s big brown eyes and realized he was the reason he wasn’t grinning that wide smile he’d grown so accustomed to, he couldn’t walk out of that door with a clear conscience. “Okay,” he decided, taking his pants back off, and sitting next to him on the edge of the edge of the bed. He looked back around the room, noticing a PlayStation next to the TV on the dresser. 

 

“Wanna play?” Michael asked, his common smirk back at its rightful spot.

 

“Depends what you have,” Jeremy grinned back at him, nudging his bare shoulder playfully. 

 

“Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy,” Michael tsked. “I have  _ everything _ .”

 

Ten minutes later, the two were splayed out on the bed, leftover snack sized candy bars spread out around them. Apocalypse of the Damned was cast on the screen, the graphics surprisingly not as bad as they remembered. Blue and brown eyes were fixated on the screen, tongues poking out in concentration as their fingers moved rapidly on the controls. 

“Michael! On your left!” Jeremy yelled out excitedly, shooting down a mass of zombies that appeared next to them. 

 

“Ahh fuck! I can’t get them all!” Michael groaned, fighting vigorously on screen. However, all his efforts did not pay off, as the words GAME OVER appeared on the screen in bright red. 

 

“I thought you said you were good at this game,” Jeremy snickered, dropping his controller on his lap. 

 

Michael stuck out his tongue. “It’s just been a while. I haven’t met anyone who plays this game since high school.”

 

“Excuses, excuses,” Jeremy teased back, popping a Kit-Kat in his mouth and pressing restart. 

 

Maybe in a few hours, Jeremy would feel that familiar wave of regret wash over him. Maybe he’d start worrying and overthinking every little action he’d done that night. But in that moment, sitting with Michael, eating sugar and playing his favorite video game, he knew he could save that for the morning.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy jerm
> 
> if you wanna leave a comment, thats cool. if not, that's cool too


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> over 300 kudos?? wowza my friends <3

Jeremy woke up to a feeling of safety.

 

It was still dark outside; either that, or Michael had wonderfully strong blinds. He could hear a strong wind hissing from outside, reminding him of the stark contrast between the bitter New Jersey cold and the comfortable warmth of Michael’s bed. 

 

Michael, Michael,  _ Michael.  _

 

He snuggled deeper into the soft bliss. Strong arms held him close as Jeremy closed his eyes and rubbed his cheek against the broad chest his head laid upon. He could hear the soft snores of his partner rumble through his hair, his chest heaving up and down with every inhale. Jeremy ran his foot up Michael’s bare calf, savoring the wonderful warmth and safety of being held. It’s perfect, too fucking perfect. It’s temporary, too fucking temporary.

 

Jeremy gave himself ten seconds more before he would unclasp himself from the embrace. 

 

_ 10, 9, 8. _ Michael murmured something softly in his sleep, subconsciously clinging to Jeremy tighter. 

 

_ 7, 6, 5. _ Jeremy ran his hand over Michael’s chest, eyes following the curious fingers lapping over his soft body hair, a strong clavicle, a dark nipple. It was as if he was trying to put the trail to memory, like a Top 40s song from five years ago whose melody was too catchy not to enjoy. 

 

_ 4, 3, 2.  _ He could hear Michael waking up with a kiss on the center of his head. He was subtle about it, but their close proximity made it impossible to hide anything. Jeremy hoped it would at least hide his racing thoughts.

 

_ 1. _

 

Jeremy knew Michael could feel his conscious state. Yet, they both pretended that the other was sleeping, only soft touches and feather light brushes from their lips on each other’s skin. Jeremy kissed Michael’s tan chest as he felt fingers gliding up his thin backbone, pressing delicately against his vertebrae. It was time to retreat, but Jeremy wanted to keep fighting.

 

The smarter part of him won out. He would never be able to think clearly with Michael consuming all his senses. Torturously slow, he unwound himself from that unfairly exquisite embrace. Michael  let him go freely. Jeremy wasn’t sure if that was because of his lack of sleep or utter regret from hours previous. 

 

No words were spoken on his way out, and he fumbled picking up his pants. It was too cold outside of the haven of the bed, but Jeremy left his shirt off. He needed to feel the consequences of what happened. He walked barefoot out of of the room and down the dark hallway. 

 

He stopped at the kitchen counter, putting on his shoes, eyes lingering over a picture on the surface. It was of Michael and Emmy, looking at the camera with their identical toothy grins. Emmy looked even tinier in Michael’s grasp and he lifted her up in the air, permanent delight etched into their faces. Their eyes were crinkly from the sunny outdoors. Jeremy couldn’t help but smile sadly. No matter how much he cared for both of them, they were a single unit. He couldn’t come between them more than he already did. 

 

Looking closer, he saw a shadow behind them on the left. His smile faded quickly. It was a reminder of everything he still didn’t know about their family, of all the layers and layers that made them the complicated beauty that they were. He ran a thumb over the shadow lightly. It wasn’t his place to try to uncover them. 

 

“That was such a great day,” Jeremy jumped after hearing Michael behind him. He cocked his head back to see Michael had put on pajama pants, but his chest was still bare and hair mused from sleep. A pitiful smile didn’t reach his tired eyes, hidden behind his glasses. He walked closer. Jeremy hoped he couldn’t hear his ever fast beating heart. 

 

“I-I didn’t mean to snoop,” Jeremy apologized, but he kept the frame in his hand. 

 

“It was right before Emmy started kindergarten. I was working insane hours back then, but somehow got the day off. She wanted to have a day to celebrate us before Emmy went to school. She was always doing stuff like that, making big gestures out of what felt like the smallest things.” Michael was next to Jeremy now, both pairs of eyes fixated on the picture. Jeremy tried his best to imagine it. 

 

“We packed a picnic, and drove so far. I remember Emmy was getting so anxious in the backseat,” Michael chuckled at the memory. “The weather was perfect, and we just spent the whole afternoon eating Goldfish and teaching Emmy how to use monkey bars.” He paused for a few moments, and Jeremy almost thought he was done talking. “That was a month before she left.” Michael’s voice was so soft Jeremy barely heard him. 

 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jeremy interjected, eyes still zoomed in on the shadow. 

 

“I blame myself, mostly. We got married so, so young. I wasn’t ready. I didn’t really know who I even was yet. Still don’t,” Michael chuckled pitifully. “It took me almost the entirety of our marriage for me to come out to her.”

 

“How did that go?” Jeremy asked in a whisper, more of a statement than a question. 

 

Michael snorted bitterly. “Not well. Not well at all,” he voice carried in a decrescendo. “She packed up and left three days after I told her. But, really, could I have expected anything better?”

 

Jeremy finally looked up at Michael, whose face was stagnant, looking anywhere but Jeremy. He took a trembling hand and interlaced their fingers. 

 

“It wouldn’t have been so bad if Emmy wasn’t part of it. Emmy complicates things,” Michael continued. “Being mad and heartbroken and hating me, that was fine. But I just don’t understand how she could leave her,” Michael shook his head with a tight lip. “Sure, she visits sometimes, but it’s become less and less often. I can’t help thinking how it’s all my fault, if I hadn’t fucked up  _ everything _ -”

 

“Hey, hey,” Jeremy interrupted, squeezing his hand tightly. “There was no way you could have hidden that forever. You can’t regret any of it. B-because now, you have a wonderfully energetic and beautiful little girl. It’s not your fault if she doesn’t share that same feeling towards Emmy,” Jeremy felt like he was babbling. He never was good at comforting others. “Ultimately, your marriage wasn’t right. No matter how many good things came from it. I-I think it’s important to recognize what you got from it and the lessons learned. But don’t  _ ever  _ think that it’s your fault Emmy and her mom don’t have the same relationship they did,” Jeremy paused. He really didn’t know what else to say., not wanting a repeat of the same cliches he spouted at the diner. He hoped he wasn’t coming off as overbearing or dumb. He wanted to be there for Michael, and he wasn’t really sure why. 

 

“Can I be honest?” Michael spoke, finally looking at Jeremy.

 

Jeremy looked back with concerned eyes.

 

“I don’t think I’ll ever really forgive myself for it.”

 

Michael’s words hung heavy in the air like an anvil. Now Jeremy really didn’t know what to say. Instead, he unclasped their hands, and wrapped his gangly arms around Michael. He could feel the glasses press into his bare collarbone as Michael clung back onto him tightly. They stood like that for what felt like hours, eyes closed and just basking in the comfort of another human, an almost competitive-like state of who could hold on the longest. 

 

Slowly, Michael raised his head back up to eye level, bravely looking back at Jeremy. Jeremy stared back courageously. Michael wasn’t crying; in fact, no trace of tears were present. Jeremy wanted to cry for him. 

 

He analyzed Michael’s stoic, almost determined face. His glasses were a little fogged from the heat of Jeremy’s chest, plump lips closed in a line. As soon as Jeremy looked down as his mouth, Michael crashed their faces together, hand coming up to lay on Jeremy’s cheek. Jeremy sighed in relief, moving his own thin fingers to card through soft, distressed hair. Michael took the lead, sliding his tongue through Jeremy’s willing mouth. Jeremy followed, content with letting his companion lead the way. Michael stepped back, leading Jeremy towards the counter with kisses that led south towards his neck. Jeremy gasped, from the cool granite on his back or Michael’s talented lips he wasn’t sure.

 

“Too damn pretty,” Michael murmured, licking and sucking at the bruises he left just a few hours before. “Don’t ever wanna stop doing this.” 

 

Jeremy closed his eyes, letting out a long breath. This was all so intense, too intense. The room was a disgusting mix of tension, lust, and frustration. Still, he felt his cock ashamedly twitch in response to Michael’s fantastically choreographed movements. He rolled his hips against Michael’s instinctively, hating the pleasure that coursed through him at Michael’s sounds. 

 

“Wait,” Jeremy gasped out, pulling away from Michael. He started shaking his head, hands going to scratch at his own thin hair. “This isn’t supposed to be happening right now.”

 

“What do you mean?” Michael said, face red with confusion and arousal. 

 

“This doesn’t feel right, right now,” Jeremy stammered out, eyes pricking with the familiar feeling of tears. “Y-you just dropped a  _ huge  _ fucking bomb on me. A’-and you respond by..by making out with me? How am I supposed to deal with that?”

 

Michael stepped back defensively. “I don’t know, okay? I just...I felt like I could trust you enough to tell you that. That doesn’t mean I’m gonna lay in my self pity forever. I don’t need to talk about it anymore, jesus,” he responded bitterly.

 

Jeremy scoffed. “You obviously do, because that is a whole ‘nother can of worms that you  _ need  _ to get over, because it’s making y-you guarded and jaded. And why did you even tell me if you hate talking about it so much? We’re not even  _ close  _ to being in a relationship,” he finished, letting out all of the anger and hurt he was feeling to the surface. His face was red with an overwhelming feeling. 

 

“Don’t tell me what I have to do. I’m not just some guy that wants you to save him. I’m perfectly fine on my own,” Michael bit back. 

 

“Good. I can’t save you even if I wanted to.” Jeremy almost regretted the words as soon as they escaped his mouth. He didn’t give Michael a chance to respond, and simply grabbed his shirt and shoes and walked out the door, closing it loudly behind him. 

 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Jeremy screeched. He’d forgotten the horrendous weather outside, as if his fresh coat of goosebumps couldn’t give him the hint. Throwing on his sweater and shoes haphazardly, he eyes glanced down regrettably towards that pink bike. It looked like it was taunting him, saying “told you so” with the sparkling handlebars. 

 

He let the tears start to fall now as he stumbled down the stairs. He hated himself. He  _ knew  _ this was going to end badly. But for some  _ stupid  _ reason, he kept coming back to Michael. And now, he’d fucked it up too badly. Now, he’d forever have an awkward, nervous relationship with Emmy, and he’d never be able to look at Michael’s face again without replaying those last moments of anger and rejection. 

 

_ Fuck _ .

 

He ran home. 

 

_________________________________

 

“I brought coffee!” Jeremy yelled far too excitedly, maneuvering his way through the pull out chairs and tables in the teachers lounge to reach his destination. Brooke, Christine, and Rich sat at their normal table, looking as tired and forlorn as the half-dead fish behind them in the tank.  

 

“Dude, I am begging you. Please,” Rich pleaded, eyes heavy and face in a scowl. “It is 7:30 am on a Monday. It is not the time for yelling.” Still, he gladly reached for a paper cup in the drink carrier. 

 

“Seriously, why are you so peppy?” Christine asked, putting down the pen in her hand and replacing it with the liquid warmth of the drink. 

 

“Nothing! I’m just really happy to be here, at my wonderful job, with my wonderful coworkers,” Jeremy smiled too brightly, as if convincing his friends of his overly positive aura could convince himself too. 

 

The truth was, Jeremy was anything but happy. His weekend consisted of laying in bed, mourning his sorrows in chili cheese fries, and overthinking everything that had happened that Halloween and the hours after it. He was dreading coming back to school, to even have the possibility of encountering Michael. Thus, he quickly came to the conclusion of making himself as busy as possible, so he wouldn’t have to think about the heaviest objects on his mind. 

 

“Okay, seriously, are you possessed?” Brooke inquired with concern, dramatically analyzing his face. 

 

“Oh no. Oh no, no, no,” Rich tsked. “I know what’s happening. What did you do.” He said the last part as more of a statement rather than a question. 

 

“What?!” Jeremy exclaimed, the blush now beginning to cover his cheeks giving away his disguise. 

 

Rich sighed loudly and rolled his eyes. “Jeremy, I have known you for way too many years. In fact, three years longers than I had ever hoped to. And I know when you’re bullshitting.”

 

“Language, Rich!” Brooke disciplined, exchanging her sour look from Jeremy to Rich. 

 

Rich brushed her off with a hand. “Everytime Jeremy comes to school with coffee, or is in even in a remotely good mood, he did something bad. Distraction is his go-to coping mechanism. Now, spill, tall ass,” he smirked, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest smugly. 

 

“I-I, uh..,” Jeremy made a noise between a groan and a hiccup, lowering his eyes to his cheap cup. Suddenly, the simple designs dressing the cup seemed like the most enthralling thing on the planet. 

 

“See! I told you!” Rich proved pompously. He rubbed his hands together and placed his elbows on the table. He drank his coffee with a salty grin. “Spill.”

 

Jeremy looked around at his friends sheepishly. Brooke and Christine looked at him with confused, apprehensive stares. Rich shook his head with an wolfish grin. Fuck. There was no way he was getting out of this one. He groaned, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back. 

 

“I might’ve gone to Michael’s house and had sex with him and then got into a decently sized fight about his ex-wife,” he breathed out as he finished. He talked so quickly all of his words melded together. 

 

“You’ve got to be fuc-” 

 

“Rich!” Brooke exclaimed, slapping him on the shoulder. 

 

“Please tell me you’re joking,” Christine’s face was between disbelief and a entertained smile. 

 

“Wait, I thought you went on a date with that online hookup!” Rich countered.

 

Jeremy shook his head with a grimace, opening his eyes. He was surprisingly disappointed to see all his friends patiently waiting for him to continue. The one time Rich’s chatterbox mouth would actually come in handy, he thought with annoyance.  There was no going back now. 

 

“I  _ did _ , and it was okay. We got high and then he started kissing me and then I realized I didn’t really like him that much?” Jeremy trailed off, voice high in question. “So I went back on the street, and Michael was there getting candy for trick-or-treaters, and then I was so cross faded I fell on the ground, and he took me to a diner and we talked and then I told him to take me to his house and…,” he shrugged. His face was getting impossibly warmer. 

 

“You know, for a teacher, you use a  _ shameful  _ amount of run-on sentences,” Rich commented. 

 

“That's not the point!” Jeremy yelled, exasperated. 

“The point  _ is _ that you and this guy have an insane amount of chemistry that is obviously not going away anytime soon,” Christine placed a hand on Jeremy’s arm affectionately. “What happened after that?”

 

Christine’s calm voice helped Jeremy continue. He swallowed, not really keen on recalling what had happened after he fucked everything up. He’d analyzed it enough over the weekend. “It was really, really great,” he smiled, thinking about the best parts before it had all gone to hell. “But then I got up in the middle of the night to leave, and I noticed a picture of him and Emmy, and then Michael was there, just telling me fucking  _ everything  _ about how his marriage fell apart and then he tried  _ kissing  _ me to make up for it, and I didn’t think that was the best idea? So I told him, but then he got mad, and we got into it, and I ended up just walking home,” he finished, feeling much worse than before he started. The coffee didn’t seem so appetizing anymore. “Like, we’re not even close to being in any kind of relationship, I don’t know why he would just lay that all on me like that.” The truth was, he really  _ did  _ want to know all that Michael wanted to share with him. That emotional connection was scarier than any kind of physical attraction they shared. 

 

“It's the post-orgasm filter. Or lack there of,” Rich explained.

 

“Well,  _ what _ exactly is your relationship?” Brooke asked the question Jeremy was too afraid to ask himself. 

 

“I don’t know? A hookup?” Jeremy doubted. A hookup would’ve been to leave it all behind that night at the bar. A hookup was not light teasing in his classroom or lingering touches in a bathroom. It was not gentle caresses and late night pancakes. Frankly, Jeremy didn’t know what category they fell into. 

 

Rich snorted in rejection, further proving Jeremy’s fears. “Yeah, okay, keep telling yourself that.” 

 

“Do you want it to just be a one time thing?” Christine added.”Two-time, in your case.”

 

Jeremy truly didn’t have an answer.

 

_____________________________________________

 

November was a cold month. It went by unbearably slow, much to Jeremy’s chagrin. The gray skies and bitter wind perfectly matched his mood. He hated himself for acting like that; it was like he’d gone through an actual breakup. Which he did not. It was just the pre-Thanksgiving break slump. Obviously. 

 

The worst part was having to see Emmy. Everyday, she would come in with her light up Sketchers and toothy smile, always eager to tell Jeremy a new story about her pet hamster or how she didn’t like the homework assigned. The teacher loved seeing her, but he couldn’t help but feel a little tricky. She had no idea about anything, and it made him feel sick. 

 

Jeremy stared at the clock in his classroom; 2:51. He had decided to show a movie in class, partially because it was the Friday before break and he just couldn’t try and rally in extra hyperactive children for a lesson. He’d hoped they’d at least learn a little bit from the history cartoon. Just a nine more minutes before his room would be significantly emptier and he’d be back alone with his thoughts.  _ Great.  _ As if his mind wasn’t already littered with thoughts of Michael. 

 

He ran a hand through his hair. The end of the day also made Jeremy’s stomach flutter with nerves. It had been almost three weeks since he’d seen Michael, and every day since then he’d been terrified Michael would come in to pick up Emmy from school. He wasn’t even sure if he was ready to face him, much less at his workplace. He could still play back where it all went downhill. 

 

After what felt like days, the final bell rang. Jeremy rushed to turn on the light as the kids packed up their backpacks excitedly, bouncing out the door. “Have a great fall break, everyone!” Jeremy called out while the majority were too busy thinking about a week off from school than talking to their teacher more. 

 

“Bye, Mr. Heere!”Emmy ran up to him, hugging his knees tightly. “I’m grateful for you this year!”

 

Jeremy wanted to cry. “I’m thankful for you, too,” he responded, returning the hug as best he could with the height difference. “Have a good Thanksgiving.”

 

She giggled and joined her friends outside near the playground, waiting to be picked up. Jeremy smiled, holding open the door for the remainder of his students trickling out. 

 

“Mr. Heere?”

 

Jeremy looked up to the unfamiliar female voice. The woman had long auburn hair wrapped up in a tight ponytail. “That’s me,” he replied with a tired smile. “How can I help you?”

The slender woman’s eyes didn’t reach her smile. “I just thought I’d come out and introduce myself. I’m Emmy’s mom.”

 

Jeremy hoped his wide eyes and gaping jaw wasn’t too noticeable. “I..uh...yes! Hello!” he greeted much too loudly. He exhaled quickly, trying to hyperventilate. Oh God. What if she knew about him and Michael? He is so fired. 

 

They stood there in silence for a few moments too long before Jeremy realized he should probably speak. “Do you want to come in?” he stammered, opening the heavy door wider. 

 

“Please,” she stated shortly, walking into the classroom. 

 

Jeremy closed the door behind him as slowly as he could. Nothing could prepare him for this. He turned back around to see Emmy’s mother gazing around the room, analyzing everything it had to offer. 

 

“Sorry it’s a bit of a mess in here, Thanksgiving always leaves a lot,” Jeremy tried to explain, his face going red. 

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me. Apocalypse of the Damned?” she asked, mouth open in disbelief pointing at the poster. The teacher couldn’t tell if she was amused or annoyed. 

 

“Yeah,” Jeremy breathed out. “My theme is classic video games. It was one of my favorite games as a kid.”

 

“You should talk to Emmy’s dad about it. He loves that game,.” Her polite smile faltered, her face dripping with hints of disappointment. 

 

_ Trust me, I know _ . Jeremy made a strangled noise, shaking his head in every which way. “Oh really? That’s cool.” He was usually so good with parents, until it came to the Mell’s. 

 

“Yeah,” she whispered, eyes still locked on the poster in nostalgia. “Anyway, that’s not why I came in,” she whipped her head back around, hands fidgety. Jeremy could relate. “I wanted to talk quickly about Emmy.”

 

“Of course,” Jeremy said, hands clammy with nerves. At least she didn’t want to talk about Michael. Maybe she didn’t know about their...escapades...after all. “Emmy’s dad and I are separated, and he has most of the custody because of my job. But I’m taking her into the city with me for the week, and I just thought I’d see how she’s doing here. Her dad doesn’t tell me anything,” she rolled her eyes, voice rich with irritation. 

 

“O-of course!” Jeremy exclaimed, a little too relieved to know this didn’t involve him doing things not so safe for work to her ex-husband. “Uh, please sit,” he led her to his desk, pulling up an adult sized chair for her to sit. After both of them were seated, Jeremy cleared his throat. “As far as school goes, Emmy is doing great,” he smiled and let out a shaky breath, trying to keep a polite amount of eye contact. Her hazel eyes were warm and scary. “Emmy is very smart and loves to learn. It’s really a pleasure to have her in class.”

 

“What about outside the classroom?” Her face was nervous now. “Is she adjusting well?”

 

Jeremy sighed before continuing. He wasn’t sure how much he should say. “She has lots of friends and gets along well with everyone! Definitely a charismatic little firecracker,” he tried to reassure her, but the doubt in his voice was evident. 

 

“”But?”

 

Just kill him now. Jeremy would rather do anything else than this right now. “She, uh..had a little incident last month.”

 

“Please don’t think I’m a horrible mother,” she interrupted quickly, eyes pleading. “Michael told me what happened. It’s been difficult for me, too,” she spoke softly. “I do care about my daughter, I really do.”

 

Seriously, right now would be an excellent time to get struck down by the hand of God. “I really don’t think it’s my place to talk about this,” Jeremy stuttered. 

 

“I just don’t want to think I don’t care about Emmy,” she repeated, as if saying more would make Jeremy believe her. “And I wanted to come in and talk to you to prove that.”

 

“I don’t think it’s me you have to prove yourself to,” Jeremy replied carefully. He didn’t want to say anything that was out of line. Then again, she was the one to waltz in here. He gestured out the window at the playground. Emmy was laughing, tongue pointed out in concentration as she climbed the monkey bars. 

 

Hazel eyes followed Jeremy’s towards the scene. “You’re right,” her voice was so soft Jeremy barely heard it. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have just barged in here like that. I just wanted to make sure she was doing okay at school.”

“You’re welcome anytime,” Jeremy said sincerely, looking back at her with kind eyes. He knew it couldn’t be easy being in her position. He could never disregard her feelings. “Have a great week with your daughter.”

 

This time, her eyes crinkled with her smile. “Thank you, Mr. Heere,” she stood up, walking towards the door. “You, too.”

 

“One more thing!” Jeremy called out from his desk as she opened the door. Her ponytail whipped back towards him in response. “I don’t think you’re a terrible mother.”

 

She gave him a small smile and wave, and exited the classroom. Jeremy looked at the pair out the window. Emmy grabbed her mother’s hand and gazed up at her adoringly. Bright, genuine smiles filled their faces as they skipped towards the parking lot. 

 

Jeremy sighed, rubbing the back of his tired neck.  _ Shit.  _ Things just got a lot more complicated.

 

_________________________   
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed this mess, let me know


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i spent 20% of writing this just editing it bc im not so sure about it

There was something a little strange and delightfully unfamiliar about being home on a Thursday morning. 

 

Of course, Jeremy was aware that it was Thanksgiving, but snoozing through his alarm all week without guilt was a feeling he would never get used to. The holiday season was fast approaching, and Jeremy supposed he would have to get accustomed to perks like a Thursday off. 

 

A whole week to himself left him with too many options. He was almost glad it was nearing the end. Without work, he didn’t have any big distractions. To steal his mind away from his thoughts, he did everything from puzzles to getting drunk alone and watching reruns of his favorite shows. The searing embarrassment of his encounter with Michael had cooled, and the dread he had associated it with had melted into bitterness. 

 

He was angry; angry that Michael acted that way, angry that Michael had to have such a complicated background, angry that Jeremy had to fall into his life in this way. Angry that Michael perceived him so much differently now, after their last conversation. Angry at the fact that Michael thought he wanted to save him, and angry at the fact that Michael might have been right. 

 

Still, it was Thanksgiving, and Jeremy did have a lot to be thankful for. His great friends, a roof over his head, a fantastic job that he loved, and a loving if not eclectic father who was always more than excited to have Jeremy visit. 

 

“Hey stranger!” Jeremy could hear his father’s booming voice through the closed doors of his car. He grinned at his dad’s overzealous walk down the steps of his childhood home to meet him on the sidewalk. 

 

“Hi, dad,” he greeted once he closed the door, wrapping his coat covered arms around the familiar paternal body he grew up hugging. 

 

“How was the drive?” he asked, taking the liberty of grabbing Jeremy’s bags from the trunk.

 

“It was fin-..Dad. I can carry my own bags,” Jeremy scolded, rolling his eyes at his father’s over the top gesture. 

 

“A good host never makes his guests carry their own luggage!” the bearded man laughed, walking back up towards the house. “Hurry up! I got a turkey that needs basting!” 

 

Jeremy sighed, shaking his head, and followed up the steps. 

 

Walking into the house he spent half his life living in was always a surreal experience for Jeremy. His dad was simple and he could always count on him to be a stagnant consistency. Almost everything looked the same from over a decade ago. The creaky panel about three steps in from the front door still rung true, never letting Jeremy forget the times he’d try coming in two hours after curfew. The big, used couch sat in the same spot in the living room, with two cushions sculpted and shaped to the liking of each of the Heere’s. The only differences was a modern coffee that took Jeremy an embarrassingly long time to set up and the football lamp Jeremy jokingly gifted his dad for Christmas three years ago. Mr. Heere had preceded taunt Jeremy with it, leaving the tacky light on the coffee table for all to see.

  
  


“Nothing’s changed, huh, Dad?” Jeremy commented loudly while his dad dropped off his paraphernalia in his bedroom down the hall. “Especially this TV. God, this thing is a monster,” he grimaced at the dust building on the fat television that had definitely seen better days. 

 

“If it aint broke, don’t fix it!” his dad called back out, echoing down the hallway. “Except for that hole in the wall from the Super Bowl Party when you were in high school. I should probably fix that,” Mr. Heere continued, joining Jeremy back in the living room. 

 

Jeremy snorted. “This house sure has gone downhill since I moved out,” he teased, sitting on his comfortably recognizable spot on the couch. 

  
  


“Hey, your old man is doing just fine on his own, thank you,” his dad responded, walking behind the kitchen island to painstakingly work on his meal. 

 

Jeremy lingered on his “old man”’s words. Looking at the gray hairs culminating on his head, or the way his father was so naively living his life alone made Jeremy sad. It almost disappointed him; the nagging feeling in his stomach always thinking he could do better for his father. Maybe if it hadn’t taken that job two hours away, or maybe if he’d been more focused on his father’s wellbeing. 

 

It was a constant reminder every holiday, of just how tiny their family really was. Every Christmas that Jeremy came home alone left an uncomfortable palpability. His dad would never admit it, but Jeremy knew he wished for more. Of course, he never tired of his father’s company, but he just wished he could provide more for the man who gave him so much. Maybe if he wasn’t such a overthinker, he could be in a happy, healthy relationship with someone he’d be proud to bring home. 

 

“Want some help?” Jeremy stood up from the couch, his inner guilt pushing him. If he couldn’t provide his dad with grandkids, the least he could do was cook the potatoes. 

 

________________________________

 

Hours later and bellies full, both of the Heere’s sat content on their worn couch, watching the football game with ridiculous intensity. 

 

“Go, go, go, go...YES!” The patriarch progressively got louder with each word, moving his legs until he was standing to celebrate the touchdown. 

 

“Finally!” Jeremy said, his father’s actions too exciting to not copy. “It only took three quarters, Jesus.”

 

“Hey, at least they scored!” his father argued back, now comfortably settling back into his spot and taking a swig of his beer. “You’ll never get a boyfriend with that negative attitude,” he teased. 

 

Jeremy flushed.  _ I’ll never get a boyfriend for a lot of other reasons _ . 

 

“Hey, I was just joking, son,” the bearded man’s voice was softer now, afraid that he might have hurt Jeremy’s feelings. 

 

“No, no, I know. I’m fine, really,” Jeremy reassured with a half assed smile. 

 

“You sure?”

 

“Yes, Dad.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Even as he got older, Jeremy had always had difficulty really connecting with his father. Although it had definitely gotten better since high school, they always seemed to fall back into their old habits of one worded responses and using football games as an excuse for bonding. It wasn’t as if either side wasn’t trying, or they couldn’t get along; they just couldn’t find the deep, father-son connection cliched in such much of their world. 

  
  


“I have an idea!” his dad boomed suddenly, forcing Jeremy out of his reverie. 

 

Jeremy looked at him like he had three heads. “Am I going to like this idea?” he asked warily, knowing that no matter his opinion, it was going to happen.

  
  


“You’re the one always telling me I need to upgrade. Let’s do it!” Mr. Heere said, gesturing towards the small-screened TV.

 

“Wait, you want to buy a TV? Right now?!” Jeremy squeaked. 

 

“It’s Black Friday! Why the hell not?” he laughed after looking at Jeremy’s appalled face. 

 

“You want us to go drive in the snow to a god forsaken Walmart and fight crowds over material stuff, hours after reflecting on how thankful we are for what we already have?” Jeremy questioned again.

 

“We’ve never done it before! Come on, it’ll be fun! YOLO, am I right?” Jeremy grimaced at his father’s awfully timed slang. 

 

“There’s no way I’m getting out of this, is there?” Jeremy closed his eyes and waited for the obvious answer. 

 

____________________

 

“It is way too cold for this,” Jeremy shivered, stomping his feet and wrapping gangly arms around his small body to try and keep warm in the Walmart parking lot. 

 

“It’ll be so worth it when we’re watching the game on a high definition screen next year,” his father tried lightening the mood. 

 

Dozens of people stood in front of them, obviously having the same ludacris idea as the Heere’s. Some brought tents to sit in, while others were playing with a deck of cards behind them. “People are actually insane,” Jeremy commented, annoyed. 

 

“Hey, lighten up! There’s only a half an hour before they open the doors,” his dad explained, looking at his watch over his gloves. “I think that coffee shop across the street is open though,” Brown eyes squinted in the foggy, dark weather. “Why don’t you go buy us some drinks to keep us busy?”

 

Jeremy groaned in response, but started walking towards his destination regardless. Anything was better than standing out in the cold. 

 

He sighed as he opened the door to the cafe, letting the overwhelming heat start to defrost him. The area was nearly empty, save for a couple giggling in a corner and a dark haired man looking concerned with a phone plastered to his cheek. 

 

“Hi,” Jeremy greeted the tired looking barista. He hated people like him, coming into these franchises on holidays, making the poor employees work on such a dreary Thanksgiving. “Can I get two coffees?”

 

As he was digging under his layers for some cash, he could hear the man’s voice in the corner getting louder. “No, no, I can’t get a hotel. My car is literally stranded here, what part can you not understand?”

 

_ Shit.  _ Jeremy made the mistake of looking up at the man, making precise eye contact. Those gentle brown eyes and thick black glasses were a little too familiar.  _ Fuck fuck fuck fuck fu- _

 

“Sir?” the barista asked in a bark. “Cash or card?”

 

“Uh, cash. Sorry,” Jeremy stumbled, dropping wrinkly dollar bills into the lady’s impatient hand. “Keep the change.”

 

Head down and hands in pockets, Jeremy sludged over to the pick up area. Under the faulty logic of if-I-can’t-see-him-he-can’t-see-me, he looked down at his boots, content with counting the amount of tied laces until he could grab his drinks and run out of that cursed building. 

 

Of fucking  _ course  _ Michael would appear in his goddamn hometown. Why he was here, Jeremy had no idea. But whatever evil he’d done in a past life sure had caught up to him now. 

 

“Jeremy?” that goddamn  _ voice  _ called out softly, making Jeremy’s heart fall directly to his stomach. He wanted to throw up. 

 

He could here the man’s footsteps approach him, coming into view on the floor. Jeremy looked up begrudgingly into that face he hated to admit he missed. 

 

Michael stared back at him for a moment, face indiscernible. “Hi.”

 

“Hi,” Jeremy repeated cautiously. He didn’t really have anything else to say. He wished he did. He wanted to ask Michael all the questions that were bombarding his mind, like  _ What the fuck are you doing here? _ and  _ What level of hell have I reached to be in this situation? _

 

Thankfully, Michael was much more articulate than him. “My car broke down on my way back from my parents,” he explained bluntly, expertly reading Jeremy’s mind. Jeremy hated him for it. “It’s currently on 1st and Maple Street.”

 

“I’m Black Friday shopping for a new TV with my dad,” Jeremy responded, and when Michael stared back at him dumbly, he continued. “Oh, uh, he’s across the street waiting in line,” Jeremy raised a gloved hand gesturing towards the other side of the street. “I just...uh, couldn’t stand to be in the cold for much longer.” 

 

Michael breathed through his nose shortly in agreement, promptly ending their short conversation. 

 

“Two coffees!” Jeremy jumped at the barista’s loud shout, and picked up his drinks. 

 

“Good luck with your car,” Jeremy said awkwardly, stopping on his voyage to the front door. He thought saying goodbye would be the polite thing to do. But then again, he wasn’t sure the proper etiquette for seeing an-ex-but-not-really at midnight on Thanksgiving. 

 

“See you later,” Michael responded without eye contact. 

Jeremy was glad his hands were full. Feeling his face start to burn, he rushed out the door. Just like his last encounter with Michael, he was met with the biting cold. 

 

“I’m back,” Jeremy said breathlessly after reaching his father, who had now significantly moved up and closer to the entrance. Looking inside, Jeremy could already tell it was a horror house filled with too many people with too many agendas. 

 

Mr. Heere took the cup gladly and raised it to his lips, quickly swallowing with a grimace. “Did you even put any sugar in this?” he asked, sticking out his tongue. 

 

_ Fuck.  _ He had been so distracted with Michael that he had completely forgotten. He took a big swallow, basking in the bitter taste. Yet another consequence. 

 

____________________________________

 

Jeremy grunted, using all of his force to lift the gigantic box into the trunk of his Dad’s 2001 Toyota. “Did you have to choose the biggest TV in the whole store?” he groaned, hands slipping on the bottom. 

 

“I panicked!” his dad grumbled back, equal amount of force trying to push the oversized box into the confines of the car. “There was too many people, I just grabbed the first one I saw!”

 

Finally, both men ended up with a victoriously ending, barely able to close the trunk with a hard push. Jeremy wiped his hands on his thighs while his dad fished out the keys. “Can we please agree to never do that again?” Jeremy lamented, quickly opening up the passenger door and getting into the vehicle. 

 

“I thought it was quite adventurous,” he dad disagreed, starting the car.

 

Jeremy turned up the heater as he drove out of the parking lot carefully. “Still doesn't make me want to repeat it,” he grumbled, rubbing his hands together.

 

They drove in silence for a few moments as Jeremy’s father expertly navigated his way out of the crowded lot full of cars and people, and made it on the street. Jeremy looked out the window, trying everything in his power to not think about Michael. 

 

God, he was  _ just  _ starting to get over it, too. Now he had a way too fresh memory that would be ingrained at the front of his mind for a good week or two. It’s like the universe wouldn’t let him forget. 

 

“You okay?” Mr. Heere said, turning the radio on softly.

 

“Yeah,” Jeremy answered, feeling bold. “I just saw an old friend at the coffee shop earlier. It was just very unexpected.”

 

“Oh, who was it? Do I know him?” Mr. Heere inquired. Jeremy knew he would. 

 

“No, no, he’s not from around here. He had car trouble,” Jeremy explained absentmindedly. 

 

“Is that him?”

 

Jeremy jerked his head from his window to the dashboard. Sure enough, about two hundred feet away, Michael was leaning over the top of his hood, obviously struggling.  _ Shit.  _ “Yeah,” Jeremy answered without thinking. 

 

“Well, he obviously needs some help. Let’s pull over,” his father suggested like it was the easiest thing in the world. 

 

“What? No!” Jeremy protested strongly. “I mean, uh, I’m sure he’ll be fine,” he added after seeing his father’s horrified expression.

 

“No way! Us Heere’s are not going to let this injustice pass, especially a friend,” Jeremy’s dad boomed dramatically, pulling into the shopping center and next to Michael’s car. Every spin of the wheel had Jeremy’s stomach churning. 

 

“Oh God,” Jeremy moaned into his hands, mentally bracing himself for the hell he was about to endure. 

 

His dad rolled down the passenger window. “Hey there!” he spoke out to Michael. “Need some help?”

 

Michael came over to the window, his eyes wide with confused shock. “Jeremy?” he asked warily. 

 

Jeremy could only stare back in regret and silent pleas to just go along with it. “Michael!” he greeted through gritted teeth. “This is my dad,” he introduced without turning his head.

 

“Hi,” Michael said flatly, his confused expression still plastered on his beautifully tan skin. It wasn’t fair that Jeremy’s cheeks exploded red in the cold and Michael could still look so  _ good. _

  
  


“Having car trouble?” Mr. Heere was oblivious to the thick tension in the air.

 

“Uh, yeah,” Michael said, looking back at his car. “Engine failure. I’m pretty much stuck here until I can get a tow in the morning.”

 

“See? He has a tow. He’s fine,” Jeremy spoke quickly, hoping to leave the situation as soon as humanly possible. 

 

“Nonsense! You’re gonna freeze out here! Hop on in, you can stay with us until the morning,” Mr. Heere smiled, obviously proud of his solution. “Any friend of Jeremy’s is a friend of mine.”

 

Michael stopped for a moment, eyes fixated on Jeremy on clues for what to do. “Friend?” he cocked his head.

 

Jeremy looked on, absolutely horrified. There was no way of getting out of this one. 

 

“Jeremy told me you guys were old pals. Now get in!” Jeremy’s dad answered for him. 

 

Jeremy wanted to apologize over and over again. His heart dropped even lower when Michael slid into the backseat behind Jeremy.

 

“I see you guys got that TV,” Michael commented, trying to maneuver around the obstacle to fasten his seatbelt. 

 

Mr. Heere laughed heavily. “Sorry about that. We weren’t expecting any visitors.”

 

Michael laughed awkwardly. Jeremy wanted to die. 

 

They drove in silence for a while, each in their own thoughts. Jeremy couldn’t stop freaking out. He wanted to know what Michael was thinking. God, how stupid was he? This was why he never told his dad anything. He just made everything into a bigger mess. And now he had to stay the night with him? At his  _ dad’s house?  _

 

His life really could not get any worse. 

 

“So, where did you and Jeremy meet?” the driver looked back at Michael through the mirror. 

 

Jeremy interrupted before Michael could even open his mouth. “College! We lived on the same floor. Right, Michael?” Jeremy looked back at him, eyes pleading with him to agree. 

 

Michael looked back at the two men, utterly bewildered. “Um, yes?” he stuttered out, eyes gazing up at Jeremy’s for approval. 

 

“That’s cool. College friends, man. Buddies for life,” Mr. Heere smiled, eyes back on the road.

 

After what felt like years for a fifteen minute drive, the newly introduced trio finally arrived back at the all too familiar home. Jeremy jumped out of the door the second his dad stepped on the brakes, not really sure where he was going. 

 

“I vote we take out the TV in the morning. I am beat,” Mr. Heere said, locking the car and yawning loudly. 

 

“Good idea, Dad!” Jeremy exclaimed a little too shrilly, acting like an over enthusiastic tour guide with how briskly he was trying to guide his two companions inside. 

 

“Well, I think I’m gonna hit the hay. Don’t forget to give our houseguest pillows and blankets, Jeremy,” the older man said, patting his son on the back. “Help yourself to whatever you’d like, Michael. Mi casa es tu casa,” he chuckled, turning around and going up the stairs towards his bedroom. 

 

Jeremy stared at Michael until he heard the slam of the door above him. “I can explain.”

 

“Please do,” Michael said curtly, refusing to move from his spot in the entryway. 

 

“I might have accidentally told my dad that we were old friends and you were having car trouble,” Jeremy explained. “But then he wouldn’t let it go and  _ insisted  _ we pick you up. Trust me, I tried to stop it.”

 

Michael ran his hand through his hair and laughed bitterly. “I don’t even know what to say right now.”

 

Jeremy grimaced. “I’m so sorry. I could drive you back to your car, if you want. I mean, you’re welcome to stay though! I’m not just gonna make you leave or anything, ‘cause I’m not heartless or anything, but I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable since you probably hate me now.”  _ Stop rambling. Just shut up.  _

 

“I mean, is it okay if I stay?” Michael spoke up, shuffling his feet. 

 

“Yeah, yeah, of course,” Jeremy responded, realizing that this was probably a lot worse for Michael right now than it was for him. At least he was playing on his home field. “Let me go set up the pull out couch.” 

 

____________________________________

 

“You’re all set,” Jeremy said awkwardly, placing the last pillow onto the stiff couch. 

 

Michael sat experimentally on the makeshift bed, bouncing a little to test it. He was dressed down in his t-shirt and jeans, his feet covered in black socks. 

 

“Well, goodnight,” Jeremy finished, turning around to go to his own bedroom. 

 

“I don’t hate you,” Michael called out seconds later, still sat on the couch.

 

“What?” Jeremy asked, head spinning around quickly. 

 

“About what you said earlier. That I hated you. I don’t,” Michael answered back calmly, hands in his lap. 

“Oh. Good,” Jeremy nodded and clicked his tongue. “I uh, I don’t hate you either.”

 

“I’m sorry, by the way. About everything, really,” Michael kept talking. Jeremy was caught between wanting to listen to him on repeat or go to bed. “I shouldn’t have acted like that, scared you away.”

 

Jeremy sighed, taking his time to formulate his response. “Emmy’s mom came to see me last week. I don’t know if you knew that.” At Michael’s surprised reaction, he continued. “She wanted to make sure I didn’t hate her for not being that present with Emmy,” Jeremy scoffed, stepping a little closer towards Michael. “She’s trying, and I can see where she’s coming from. I-I just don’t think I can get any more involved with it. It would just be so much messier, I know it.” 

 

Michael rubbed the back of his neck. “Oh, fuck. Jesus, Jeremy, I’m sorry. You’re right. You don’t...shouldn’t have to deal with this.”

 

Jeremy exhaled, the lump in his throat growing. It seemed they were doomed to be in this endless cycle with no way out. 

 

“I started going to a therapist. I mean, it’s only been one session so far, but. I don’t know. You were right, that night. And uh, I’m working on it.”

 

Jeremy looked at Michael, whose head was down looking at his lap. His confession felt surprisingly and completely unexpected. “That’s...good. I’m, uh, that’s great.” He resisted the urge to say anything else. 

 

“I don’t want you thinking I’m not trying. It’s mostly for Emmy. She needs me to be a better parent, for sure.” Michael continued. Jeremy finally managed the courage to sit next to him. “But I want to try for you, too. If you want.”

 

Jeremy placed his own hands in his lap. “I don’t know what I want. I just can’t do this same thing again, over and over,” he gestured with his arms. Sighing heavily, he continued. “I have to know that this is something real. This isn’t just me and you here. There is a lot at stake here.”

 

“I know,” Michael said earnestly. “Do you maybe...wanna try, though? We can take it so, so, slow, as slow as you wan-”

 

Jeremy’s words poured out of his mouth faster than he could stop it. “Okay.”

 

Michael grinned, looking up at Jeremy, who was trying his best to suppress a small smile. A tan hand grabbed the pale one next to him, squeezing softly. “Okay?” Michael questioned for reassurance. 

 

“Yeah,” Jeremy breathed out and nodding. He was deathly afraid of what he’d just agreed to, but then Michael was leaning in for a kiss and he couldn’t resist. 

 

_ Jesus. _ Jeremy almost forgot how wonderful it felt to kiss Michael. His lips fit so perfectly against Jeremy’s as it they were born to do this activity and nothing else. The thinner man scooted closer until their thighs touched through thick layers of pants.Michael brought a hand up to a thin cheekbone, caressing his face softly with a thumb. 

 

Jeremy was over the tenderness. He swiped his tongue across Michael’s full bottom lip, gaining access to his mouth without protest. Jeremy couldn’t help but smile against the kiss, effectively breaking it. 

 

Jeremy moved back and stood up, smile still stuck on his face. “Wait, wait, where are you going?” Michael pleaded, hand falling back lamely on the side of the couch. 

 

“I’m not fooling around with you at my dad’s house,” Jeremy said, walking backwards down the hallway towards his own room. “But I’ll see you tomorrow morning!”

 

“Oh, you  _ tease _ ,” Michael groaned, shoving his face into a pillow. 

 

He looked so cute that Jeremy almost went back in the room and had his way with him. But he figured with their new arrangement, they’d have plenty more time for that later.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ????
> 
> anyway, this story is coming to a close in the next 2-4 chapters or so. 
> 
> however, if yall have any prompts u want me to do after i finish this, i might take u up on it


	9. Chapter 9

“Good morning, handsome.”

 

Jeremy reluctantly opened his eyes to the hushed voice above him. Michael stood in a hoodie and jeans, looking too put together for an early Sunday morning. His hands were full of two coffee cups and a rolled up white paper bag. 

 

He groaned, raising up his arms and arching his back as he stretched. “Morning,” the paler man smiled drowsily back up at Michael. “What time is it?” he asked groggily, sitting up slowly against the headboard. 

 

“8:30,”  the dressed man replied, placing the goodies on the side table and sitting on the edge of the bed. 

 

“Jesus. You do realize it’s the last day of Thanksgiving break? There’s a thing called sleeping in,” Jeremy teased, reaching over Michael to grab one of the coffees. The chill of the room reminded him that he was still exposed from last night’s activities. 

 

The morning after Michael had slept over at the Heere’s was awkward, to say the least. However, the tow was surprisingly fast and reliable, and Michael’s car was in their local shop. Jeremy had taken Michael back to his house after a very,  _ very  _ drawn out and uncomfortable breakfast with his father.  Which brought them back to where they were now, spending the weekend at Jeremy’s,  quickly getting back to where they’d left off. 

 

“I wanted to get those bomb ass muffins from SQUIP’s, and they sell out so fast on Sunday’s,” Michael explained, gesturing towards the bag. “Plus I can’t see your cute face while I’m sleeping, so it kinda loses its appeal,” he grinned, placing a long arm on the other side of Jeremy’s body and kissing him deeply. 

 

“God you’re such a schmoozer,” Jeremy rolled his eyes after breaking away, pulling up the blanket covering his modesty a little higher. “But thanks for the coffee. And muffins.” He started to reach over to grab the pastries. 

 

Michael smiled and kicked off his shoes, leaning over to kiss Jeremy’s shoulder. “You’re welcome,” he murmured against pale skin. 

 

Jeremy dropped the bag next to him on the bed, running a hand through Michael’s hair softly. He could feel Michael’s lips coil upwards into a smile as lips traveled north, his mouth getting more pressing each kiss. 

 

“Can’t even let me enjoy my coffee without wanting to get in my pants,” Jeremy said, warm cup still in the shaky hand not preoccupied with Michael’s mane. 

 

“That’s quite presumptuous of you to assume. I’m just kissing you,” Michael teased, suckling a hickey next to the ones made the night before. “And in case you forgot, you’re not even wearing pants.” Jeremy gasped when Michael’s hand snaked under the thin cover and gripped in, lazily running his fingers over Jeremy’s quickly interested dick. “But since you’re so damn insatiable, I guess I can comply.”

 

“Fuck you,” Jeremy breathed out, using the dwindling blood in his brain to put the paper cup back on the nightstand. He grabbed Michael’s head and crashed their mouths together. 

 

“I’m all yours,” Michael replied against his lips softly, firmly grasping at Jeremy’s rapidly hardening dick and sliding his hand in smooth strokes from base to tip,. Jeremy tried to keep his breathing in check as he continued kissing Michael, tongue sliding against his bottom lip. Michael quickly complied, opening up his mouth and deepening the kiss. 

 

“ _ Michael _ ,” Jeremy groaned on a particularly good stroke, his mouth going slack against Michael’s, allowing the darker man’s tongue to lick across the roof of his mouth teasingly. Michael exhaled with that damn  _ smirk _ , thumb rubbing intensely over his head. He pulled Michael by his hoodie’s strings so that he was laying over him, hands grasping onto his strong shoulders. “Too many clothes. Not fair,” Jeremy complained in pants as Michael’s hand relentlessly stroked him, sending licks of pleasure through his body. 

 

Michael laughed breathlessly, lowering his head so Jeremy could pull the nagging piece of clothing off. Jeremy was thankful Michael hadn’t bothered to put on a shirt underneath it. He ran his hands along those smooth planes, his grip tightening in time with the tension curling up his his stomach. 

 

Michael pulled his hand away to readjust, taking those talented lips from Jeremy’s eager mouth down his chest. Jeremy watched with half lidded eyes at the scene before him, Michael taking the torturous scenic route down his slim frame, refusing to touch Jeremy where he needed it most. 

 

Jeremy moaned in a cloudy mix of frustration and lust when Michael mouthed at his thighs, never breaking his eye contact. “Michael please,” he begged, hands going to rest on either side of his shaky body. 

 

Michael responded with pecks and licks in his inner thigh, dotting every piece of Jeremy’s skin with his touch. “You doing okay, baby?” Michael spoke out in a muttering tone, resting his chin on his hip, mere inches away from Jeremy’s hard, dripping cock. 

“No more teasing, please,” Jeremy sighed, flush covering his face at the word ‘baby’. Over their short but fantastic sex lives so far, he realized Michael was a big communicator; calling him sweetheart as Jeremy rode his fingers, spilling out praise everytime Jeremy sucked him off. Jeremy had never thought of himself as a big fan of so much dirty talk, much less so many pet names, but Michael’s impeccable talent of knowing exactly what to say to make Jeremy fall apart was something he didn’t think he could go without. 

 

“Okay, Jer,” Michael complied, pressing a kiss to the tip before taking it into his mouth, much to Jeremy’s relief. He rubbed at Jeremy’s bony hips with soft thumbs licking up the underside the more he took in. He moved one hand to massage his balls gently, breathing out through his nose as he made his way up Jeremy’s shaft. 

 

Jeremy whimpered, trying his best not to buck up into the wet warmth of Michael’s mouth. Instead, he reached a hand not gripping the sheets towards Michael’s thick locks, pulling softly. “Fuck, Michael,” he moaned, the pleasure an incessant hum coursing through his veins. 

 

Michael moaned in response, vibrations carrying up and down Jeremy’s sensitive cock, causing the grip on his hair to tighten. Michael only took this as more encouragement, sliding down further, as his hand grasped Jeremy’s thigh wonderfully tight. 

 

“Please, don’t stop. Please,” Jeremy pleaded, his filter completely absent from his lust-clouded mind. Michael ran his hand from his thigh to his waist, circling the skin softly in gentle reassurance. The paler man couldn’t help but start to buck up into that wonderful heat, tears starting to fill both men’s eyes. “Oh  _ fuck _ Michael.”

 

Michael continued to take the abuse as Jeremy’s thrusts became more and more erratic, until he stopped midway minutes later, letting out a loud moan as he spilled down Michael’s throat, eyes closed in unspeakable pleasure. Michael moved his hands from his balls to cover his heaving chest, rubbing softly to calm him down. 

 

He swallowed quickly, taking his mouth back and resting his slick chin back on Jeremy’s stomach. “You okay, babe?” he grinned, lips shiny with Jeremy’s come.

 

Jeremy almost came again at the sight before him. Michael, dark toned skin beautifully flushed, eyes blown dark with lust, hair askew from Jeremy’s insistent tugging, and mouth and chin coated in saliva and cum.  _ Jesus, _ he thought as he brain began to reconnect,  _ what an image _ . 

 

Jeremy raised his hand to Michael’s face, rubbing a thumb to collect the mess. Breathing heavily, he watched helplessly as Michael took his digit in his mouth, licking it clean. He felt his exhausted dick twitch lamely in response. 

 

Michael made his way back up towards Jeremy’s face. He kissed him deeply, grinding his denim covered dick against Jeremy’s thigh. “So hot, Jer. You’re so pretty,” Michael whispered, letting his head rest on Jeremy’s neck. 

 

Once Jeremy’s senses came back together, he crooked a hand down to haphazardly start to unbutton the jeans, which came as a difficulty to their brains’ lustful states.

 

Michael groaned out of frustration, sitting up quickly to shuck off the obnoxious pants. “Bet you wished you didn’t leave to get breakfast now, huh?” Jeremy teased with a smirk. 

 

“Shut up,” Michael replied shortly, finally succeeding in kicking off both his boxers and jeans, making his way to blanket himself over Jeremy once more. 

 

They stared at each other for a moment, Jeremy’s blissed out state leaving a permanent admirable glaze on his eyes. “Whatcha thinking about?” Michael asked, nuzzling his nose. 

 

Jeremy hummed. “Kiss me, please.”

 

Obeying, Michael led with a passionate agenda, tongue exploring Jeremy’s mouth with such devotion that Jeremy couldn’t think about anything else. Michael grinded down on Jeremy again, cock already messy with his own precome. Pale fingers wrapped around Michael’s dick, causing an exaspherated moan to slip from Michael’s mouth. 

 

“Jer,” Michael sighed, head falling back to the crook of Jeremy’s collarbone. Said man continued to jack him off in tight, fast strokes. “‘M already close.”

 

Jeremy smirked, going impossibly faster as Michael’s panting grew louder. Suddenly, the body above him froze, a groan breathed out against his chest as Michael spilled onto his hand and stomach. 

 

He laid down next to Jeremy in exhaustion, chest heaving heavily as he tried to regain his senses. Jeremy reached to grab tissues from the nightstand to clean the pair off and tossed the discarded paper into the small trash can he had next to the bed.

 

Jeremy turned towards Michael, leaning on one arm. “Hi,” he said simply, gazing down at Michael, who was still coming down from his high.

 

The darker man grinned. “Hi.”

 

“The muffins are cold now.”

 

______________________________________

  
  


Out of every time during the week, Sunday nights were Jeremy’s least favorite. The constant reminder of the dwindling weekend haunted him every time he checked the time, a consistent accountability to get all the work he procrastinated on done. This Sunday, Jeremy had the luxury of ever more stress accumulating in his head, because this was the first Sunday he allowed himself to think about him and Michael’s future. 

 

It was strange to ponder about the possibilities that were now tangible and not just a part of his daydreams. He and Michael still had to talk about the logistics about their whole...whatever it was. They’d let themselves be drunk on each other over the weekend, but as the new week neared, Jeremy was reluctantly sobering up. As much as he wished it could be just them in their perfect, sexy, carefree bubble, the stack of papers waiting to be graded on the coffee table was a sickening wake-up call. 

 

Jeremy resisted the urge to call Michael, and tried to focus on spelling tests. He knew Michael was busy too, going to pick up Emmy from her mom’s. Jeremy wished he could be a fly on the wall for that conversation. His knee bounced up and down as he tried to focus. It wasn’t his place to even get to think about involving himself into their interpersonal lives. He and Michael were nowhere near that stage yet. 

 

He grabbed a new test, reading to grade it aimlessly.  _ Shit _ , he thought as he read Emmy’s messy scrawl on the top. Just when he was trying  _ not  _ to think about how this would affect her. He put himself in her shoes; if his dad had started seeing someone, much less his  _ teacher _ , only a year after his mom left, he would be less than pleased. He really didn’t want to ruin the comfortable relationship he had with Emmy right now. 

 

God. He was such a homewrecker.

 

He put all the frustration and confusion he was feeling into his grading, the time going fast as he rammed through his grading. His knee wouldn’t stop twitching. He reached blindly for his next sheet, only to encounter the cool wood of his coffee table. Wow.  _ Maybe I should get irritated at myself more often if I’m so efficient _ , he thought, cleaning up the thick stack of completed papers and placing them in his open work bag. He paused, hands in his lap with his bag and looked around the small living room, sighing heavily. 

 

He was so fucked. 

 

He jumped suddenly when his phone started vibrating violently on the couch next to him. Picking it up quickly, he looked at the name and grinned, pushing his bag onto the floor and answering. 

 

“Hey there, stranger,” Jeremy greeted, leaning back against the couch cushions. His back ached from hunching over his work. 

 

“Isn’t it weird that we’ve known each other for almost three months and this is my first time calling you?” Michael’s smooth voice flooded through the receiver.

 

“If you really wanted to call me, you could’ve just looked up my number in the school directory,” Jeremy bantered back. He didn’t think he’d ever get over how easy it was to converse with Michael. He was usually so unsure of himself in conversations, but not with Michael. 

 

“Touche,” Michael chuckled.

 

“Why are you calling me? I just saw you like,” Jeremy paused to look at the time, “six hours ago.”

 

“I missed you,” the voice on the receiver made Jeremy blush. 

 

“How’s Emmy?” Jeremy changed the subject, the familiar anxiety filling up his mind.

 

“Good, good. I missed her, too. I just put her to bed, which is so much harder than I remembered from last week,” Michael joked. Jeremy could hear rustling from the other end. “Sometimes six year olds are just so stubborn.”

 

“Look who you’re talking to,” Jeremy deadpanned. “I deal with twenty-seven of them on a daily basis.” Michael’s wonderful laugh carried through. 

 

“So.”

“So,” Jeremy repeated.

 

“Speaking of Emmy, we should probably talk logistics. About us. And her,” Michael stammered slowly as if he wasn’t sure what he was saying. 

 

“Yeah,” Jeremy breathed. “I was thinking about that, too.”

 

“I want to wait, obviously. I don’t want to shock her, or anything. Especially because it’s so new,” Michael was saying exactly what Jeremy was thinking. It didn’t really make the content any easier to swallow. He hated that he was a risky variable for them. 

 

“I totally agree,” Jeremy answered. “I think we should keep it under wraps for a while. I don’t need anyone from school finding out. I mean I know it’s not technically against the rules but I don’t want parents to think things and tell their kids an-”

 

“Jeremy,” Michael stopped him in a firm but gentle tone. “I get it.”

 

Jeremy felt himself blush further. “Sorry. I’m still a little nervous,” he admitted shakily. 

 

“Just breathe,” Michael exhaled quickly through his nose. “It’s not as crazy as you’re making it out to be.”

 

Jeremy obeyed and sighed clearly. “Sorry. You’re right. We’ll just take it slow, right?”

 

“Yes.” Jeremy hated how he needed all this reassurance. This was still so new and unfamiliar. Jeremy barely knew how to act in regular relationships, much less something as complicated as this. “Now stop worrying your pretty little head and get some sleep, okay?” Michael spoke. 

 

Jeremy smiled. “Goodnight, Michael.”

 

“Goodnight, Jeremy.”

 

He hung up the phone reluctantly. 

 

_________________________________________

 

The short-lived fall break only made Jeremy’s students even more hyper than they were before it. As if Mondays weren’t difficult enough, Jeremy now got to deal with too talkative six year olds who couldn’t seem to focus on learning subtraction. 

 

“Girls and boys, listen up!” Jeremy yelled out over the small chatter and giggles. “If you keep up this talking there’ll be no afternoon recess. And Thomas, go make yourself an island. You’ve lost group privileges.”

 

Said boy frowned but obeyed, moving his desk from out of his four person group and into the back corner by himself. “Not fair Mr. Heere,” he complained loudly. “You didn’t move Sam!”

 

“You were the instigator, young man,” Jeremy lectured back as he turned back to the board. After three months with his students, they knew by now how Jeremy’s teaching style was. Although he was firm, he truly did care about his students and their learning. Sometimes being strict was necessary to keep the order. 

 

Suddenly, a large thunder came from outside, windows quickly painted in water drops. His students squealed, stopping their work to gaze outside into the gray. 

 

“Mr. Heere, it’s raining!” Jenny exclaimed in concern. 

 

“Does that mean inside afternoon recess?” Thomas asked, setting off an astounding amount of murmur throughout the classroom. Inside recess was quite the luxury. 

 

“I mean, I guess so,” Jeremy answered, secretly sad that he wouldn’t get his fifteen minutes of respite. “But!” He proclaimed loudly, stopping the excited chatter that had started at his response. “We still have eight more minutes of math time, though. Maybe if you guys work really hard I’ll bring out Candyland,” he promised. He grinned, knowing the reward system was a fool-proof way of getting the children to listen. 

 

Soon enough, the room was quiet again as small minds worked diligently on their worksheets. Jeremy walked around the classroom, looking over their heads at their progress and stopping when a hand raised. Before he knew it, the bell tolled above him, promptly setting off papers cramming into desks and fidgety students to move around in the desks excitedly. 

 

Jeremy raced towards the game closet, pulling out game after game as the boxes were grabbed from his hands. “Play nicely, everyone! Don’t lose any of the pieces, okay?” he yelled out into the sea of students, who had already gone to recess-mode, opening up the boards and pieces at record speed. 

 

Jeremy sighed, returning to his haven of a desk and running his hands through his hair. He perked up after hearing a voice squeak on his right.

 

“Mr. Heere?” He looked up to see Emmy holding Connect 4 in her hands expectantly, a shy grin on her face.

 

“Hey, Emmy, what’s up? You need someone to play with you?” Jeremy responded, scanning the room to pick a volunteer. 

 

“Do you wanna play with me?” the brunette asked.

 

Jeremy smiled. “Of course.”

 

They found an empty floor space next to his desk, sitting down and pulling out the game pieces. “Red or yellow?” Jeremy asked playfully with a cock of his eyebrow. 

 

“Hmm..,” Emmy pondered, sitting on her knees. “Yellow!”

 

“Alrighty then,” Jeremy divided the colors and pushed up the bracket. “You go first.”

 

Emmy pushed her first coin into the middle slot. “Guess what I did over break, Mr. Heere?!”

 

“What did you do?” Jeremy dropped a red one on top of Emmy’s. 

 

“I went to New York City! I stayed with my mom and we went to the park and ate ice cream even though it was really,  _ really _ cold and then we looked at all the tall buildings and it was so fun!” Emmy explained, finally deciding to place her piece on the left side. 

 

Jeremy’s stomach churned. He was happy that Emmy and her mom were bonding, but it kept reminding him how fragile Emmy’s family state was, especially at an age where she was so impressionable. He had no idea if or how he could explain him and Michael’s relationship to her, even if they were taking it slow. “I am so glad you had fun!” Red fell next to yellow. 

 

“What did you do, Mr. Heere?”

 

Fuck. 

 

“Well, I mostly spent it at home doing work stuff,” Jeremy laughed at Emmy’s disgusted reaction. “I know, I know. So not cool. But I did go see my dad and had Thanksgiving with him.”

 

“That’s cool, I guess,” Emmy admitted honestly. Jeremy had always loved kids’ lack of filters. Sometimes it felt like it was the only honest conversations he had. “Mr. Heere?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Are you married?”

 

If Jeremy was eating, he would have choked. “Nope,” he replied shortly. 

 

Emmy sat on his response for a second, switching her position to crossing her legs. “Do you have any kids?”

 

“I have you guys,” Jeremy said honestly with a smile. 

 

Emmy laughed. “No, silly. I mean real kids!”

 

By now, the game had gotten more crowded by red and yellows. Emmy was close to winning, with three yellows lined up horizontally. “No, I don’t.”

 

“Do you want real kids?”

 

“Maybe someday,” Jeremy admitted truthfully. He’d had students ask much weirder questions before, but it still made him a little uncomfortable. He hoped his short answers would bore Emmy to changing the topic to the newest Barbie or crayon set she wanted. 

 

“I think you would be a good daddy,” Emmy responded. “Even though you’re a teacher, you’re not so bad, I think.”

 

Jeremy snorted and tried not to think of her comment too deeply. Visions of him actually getting to be a part of Emmy and Michael’s lives trespassed through his mind. Playing games with Emmy, just like now, only in the comfort of their own home, in warm pajamas and fuzzy socks, with Disney princess songs playing in the background. Or helping Emmy with homework while Michael made them dinner, the smells from the kitchen distracting but student and tutor from the work. He hated how much he wanted it. “You’re not so bad either, Miss Emmy,” he replied softly with a wink, playing his next piece without thought. 

 

“Oh, that was a bad move, Mr. Heere,” Emmy laughed maniacally, dramatically dropping her winning yellow to complete the set. “I won!”

 

Jeremy clicked his tongue, shaking his head in faux disappointment. “Oh my gosh. You’re just too good at this game!”

 

Emy bounced around as much as she could sitting down, raising her hands in the air in celebration. “I am the Connect 4 master!” 

 

Jeremy laughed, putting the game away. “Good game,” he laid out his hand for a shake. 

 

Emmy took it enthusiastically. “Good game, Mr. Heere.”

 

“Now go put this game away and find a new one. You still have,” Jeremy looked up at the clock. “Seven more minutes of recess.”

 

Emmy obeyed, grabbing the box and racing towards the girls playing an obviously makeshift version of Battleship. Jeremy got up and wiped his hands on his pants, sighing in relief as the soft cushion of his desk chair illuminated the harsh soreness from the hard floor. He looked around the room to make sure everyone was busy, and pulled out his phone. 

 

**Jeremy:** _ Your daughter just whipped my ass in Connect 4. And I wasn’t even letting her win. FML _

 

Moments later, he felt his phone buzzing with a reply. 

 

**Michael:** _ she plays that game at least four times a night at our house, so totally not surprising. Or maybe you just suck at board games ;) _

 

Jeremy tried to hide his smile. 

 

**Jeremy:** _ ha, ha. She totally through me off my groove, obviously schmoozing me to make me distracted. Must get that from her father _

 

**Michael:** _ i’ve never gotten a complaint from you ;) _

A blush threatened to creep up on him as he hunched over his desk. 

 

**Jeremy:** _ don’t engage in suggestive talk while we’re both at work _

 

**Michael:** _ don’t act like you don’t like it.  _

 

**Jeremy:** _ go away. Make up a new flavor of Pepsi while you’re at it. they're not paying you to sit on your ass. _

 

**Michael:** _i'd rather have your ass sitting on me ;)_

 

 **Jeremy:**   _oh my god goodBYE_

 

The bell rang, causing the teacher to toss his phone back in his bag and start the chaotic process of cleaning up the disaster of an indoor recess. Even looking at the hefty task before him, he couldn’t keep the smile off his face. 

 

Maybe this wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im a disgusting sap who cant write angst
> 
> lemme know ur thoughts if u got time, im a sucker for feedback


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> midterms have been kicking my ASS yall

“What do you want for Christmas?”

 

Jeremy opened his eyes and gazed up at Michael from his spot of his lap. Michael was still running a hand through Jeremy’s hair softly, while Jeremy relaxed into the feeling and listened to the TV across from them. “I’m Jewish, remember?” Jeremy reminded him with a chuckle. 

 

“I know, but I still wanna get you something,” Michael said leaning down to kiss his clothed back.

 

He moved his head slightly on Michael’s thighs to get a better view. “Are we actually gonna do this?” Jeremy groaned with a roll of his eyes. 

 

Michael chuckled. “What do you mean?”

 

“I mean,” Jeremy started, slowly sitting up so he was next to Michael at eyes level on the couch. Jeremy paused, looking at Michael. He seemed so hopeful and proud of himself at the suggestion of getting each other Christmas gifts. At Jeremy’s hesitation, his gaze grew more disappointed, saddened eyes behind thick frames. 

 

Sometimes, it felt like Michael was so much more comfortable with them than Jeremy was. He didn’t give in to normal factors that Jeremy always thought about, like the fact they’ve only been ‘dating’ (Jeremy still wasn’t sure what to call it) for a few weeks, or the fact they wouldn’t even be able to see each other on Christmas anyway. Michael didn’t seem to account for those, or he simply didn’t care. Jeremy wasn’t sure to love or hate him for it. All he knew was that he would forever despise any look that wasn’t pure joy plastered on Michael’s smooth face. 

 

“I want the new Mario Kart deluxe set,” Jeremy said finally, throwing caution to the wind. He was doing that a lot lately. 

 

Michael’s toothy smile made Jeremy copy almost immediately. “Cool.” Michael grabbed Jeremy’s hand, rubbing his thumb along the knuckles. 

 

“What about you? What do you want?” Jeremy used his other hand to play with Michael’s fingers. 

 

“Hmm,” Michael pondered, scratching his chin dramatically. “Just you,” he grinned wolfishly, earning a distasteful groan from Jeremy. 

 

“Okay, Mariah,” Jeremy deadpanned with a soft chuckle. “I told you mine, now tell me yours.”

 

Michael fidgeted in his spot. “I don’t really know, to be honest,” Michael answered shyly. “I don’t get asked that often.”

Jeremy didn’t know what to say. Instead, he brought their intertwined hands to his lips, kissing the tan hand softly. “Well, keep me posted. There’s only two more weeks left to decide, and I am not showing up empty handed.”

 

Michael smiled. “I already told you what I really wanted,” he said more suggestively, leaning in to kiss him. “Can’t I get my present early?” He unlocked his hand from Jeremy’s grasp and moved it to his waist, pulling his up to straddle his lap. 

 

Jeremy hummed, locking his legs behind Michael’s back. “I’m not sure that’s how it works,” he ran his hands through Michael’s hair and leaned down to kiss his pouty lips. “But I’ll see what I can do.”

 

_____________________

 

“Please tell me you didn’t forget to bring  _ The Polar Express  _ this year,” Brooke mumbled under her breath.

 

Every year, Brooke and Jeremy would combine their two classes to have a joint holiday party. It kept the same formula throughout the years, just because of the sheer chaos that was inevitable when almost 60 small children were put in a room with copious amounts of hot chocolate and sugar, with the promise of Christmas break just around the corner. They’d have their fair share of cookies and hot chocolate, and put on  _ The Polar Express _  to entertain the fidgety adolescents. 

 

Jeremy watched as Brooke’s talkative students took seats on the large carpet centered to face the projector screen. “No, I learned my lesson from last year,” he answered with a chuckle, waving the DVD case up from his spot by his desk. 

 

“Good,” Brooke answered, wiping her hands on her jeans as the room collectively increased in sound. “Hey, boys and girls! We’re not giving out any hot cocoa until you sit still and be quiet!” She glanced over at Jeremy, her face are clear indication of  _ here goes nothing _ . 

 

Twenty minutes later, all 54 students were seated, bellies full of cookies and hands occupied with Dixie cups full of cocoa. Jeremy had just hit play on the movie, and he and Brooke sat in the back of the classroom surveying it all. The room filled with the sounds of Tom Hanks and holiday music as the students watched on, transfixed. 

 

“That could have gone worse,” Brooke started stacking unused cups and wiping up small spills on the table. 

Jeremy nodded in response, throwing away the used napkins quietly. “Thomas! I said stop talking or you have to sit at your desk,” he scolded, making said boy blush and shut his mouth. 

 

Brooke sighed, sitting in one of the small chairs and patting the seat next to her. “I feel like we’ve seen the movie so many times I can quote it from memory,” she whispered as Jeremy sat next to her. 

 

They sat in silence for a few minutes, supervising the small crowd in front of them and watching out for the chatterboxes while basking in the hypnotizing quiet that a movie always brought. 

 

“Hey, so what’s going on with that one parent guy?” Brooke spoke softly suddenly, turning her face towards Jeremy. “You guys still doing okay after the Thanksgiving thing?”

 

He looked over, her curious face illuminated only by the dark tones of the film. “I think so,” he replied, trying to hide his smile. “It’s been really, really fun so far. I like him a lot,” Jeremy admitted freely in a hushed tone. He was so fucked.

 

Brooke grinned back at him wolfishly, raising her eyebrows. “Just how fun are we talking here?” she asked teasingly. 

 

Jeremy felt his face heat up, thanking whatever god above for the darkness. “Oh my god we are not talking about this,” he responded, dismissing her with a hand. 

 

“Oh, come on! I spent my Friday nights alone with my cat! Let me live vicariously through you!” Brooke whined. 

 

Jeremy rolled back his head and closed his eyes with a groan. “It’s..good. Okay?” he peaked over at Brooke’s impatient stare.

 

“Good? That’s all you’re gonna give me?”

 

“Yes!” Jeremy screeched, trying to keep quiet to not disrupt the movie. Brooke stared back at him with crossed arms, not budging from her stance. 

 

“Fine. It’s fucking great, okay?” Jeremy caved. “Let’s just say he knows  _ exactly _ what he’s doing,” he grinned. He hated how he loved to talk about it. 

 

Brooke squealed quietly. “Jeremy, you dirty dog!” she punched him softly in the shoulder. “Ugh. I wish my kids had hot parents.”

 

“No you don’t,” Jeremy replied back with a chuckle. “It just makes everything much more complicated.” he looked down at his hands. “I don’t know how we’re gonna tell Emmy. I just don’t want her to hate me, you know?” 

 

The music from the movie dialed down as the train made its way towards the North Pole. Brooke placed a hand on Jeremy’s. “That girl could never hate you. Trust me. And I think you’re making the right decision to wait to tell her. But I promise you it’s not gonna be as big of a disaster as your mind is thinking it will be,” Brooke chuckled, lightly musing up Jeremy’s hair. 

 

Jeremy laughed softly, “Thanks,” he looked back at his friend. “It’s just been so weird. I’ve never done anything like this before.”

 

“I know, but you’ve got to stop freaking out about it. Otherwise you won’t be able to enjoy it,” Brooke squeezed his hand softly and grinned. 

 

“I guess you’re right,” Jeremy sighed, squeezing back. Both heads turned back to the movie, occasionally whispering the next line to each other in amusement. Suddenly, a small body stood up from the center of the carpet and walked hurriedly to a desk. 

 

“Emmy, why are you up?” Jeremy asked sternly and a bit confused. 

 

“I forgot to do something!” Emmy yelled back in a sharp whisper, grabbing a crinkled bag from inside her desk and running over to Jeremy’s side, holding out the wrapped gift. “I got you a Christmas gift! Well, my daddy bought it but I helped pick it out!” she said proudly.

 

Jeremy looked over at Brooke, who looked back with raised eyebrows and a knowing stare. “Thank you very much, Emmy,” he took the gift and with Emmy’s hungry stare began to open it quickly. He tried not to smile too wide at the small video game case. “Wow. This is just what I wanted! Thank you,” Jeremy responded, running a thumb over the Mario Kart logo. 

 

Suddenly, the gift was pushed against his chest as Emmy went in for a surprise hug. Jeremy patted her back softly, trying to not read into it as much as his mind wanted him to. And just as quickly as it began, Emmy pulled back. “I’ll go back to my seat now, Mr. Heere,” she nodded and bounced back to her spot in the middle of the carpet.

Jeremy gazed over at Brooke, who kept her same knowing look and crossed arms. 

 

“Told you so.”

 

___________________________

 

Much of Jeremy’s winter break consisted of Netflix binges, emptying wine bottles, and missing Michael. 

 

He, of course, wasn’t very proud of his vacation activities. But Michael had Emmy for practically all of the break. Jeremy knew that it was something that came with the territory of dating someone with a child, but it didn’t make it any easier. Especially during a vacation, where he had nothing to do except sit on his ass like the loser he was. 

 

Jeremy woke up with a cricked neck on his couch, long legs bent in the most uncomfortable way. He wiped his sleepy eyes with a hand, sitting up and surveying the display of wine and video game controllers on his coffee table. Jesus. He really was a mess. 

 

Suddenly, the doorbell rang, echoing through his tiny apartment and making him groan. He itched his head and walked groggily towards the door, not bothering to look through the eyehole. His eyes widened at the sight before him. 

 

There in his tiny hallway stood Brooke, Christine, and Rich, all decked out in their warmest layers with smiles on their rosy faces. 

 

“Surprise!” they yelled in unison. 

 

Jeremy looked at them cautiously. “What are you doing here?” he asked. 

 

“We came to surprise you!” Brooke exclaimed with a bounce. 

 

“You’ve been noticeably absent from our group chat lately, and we know you can’t really see Michael that much, so we’re taking you out!” Christine explained.

 

“But clearly we interrupted something. Did a hurricane pass through here? You look horrible,” Rich added, marching into his apartment and opening the fridge. 

 

“Thanks,” Jeremy said flatly, closing the door behind his friends. He was about to decline their offer, but after seeing their excited faces he hesitated. A day in the city seemed like a perfect way to keep his mind off of how lonely he was. “Gimme twenty minutes,” he sighed, walking drudgingly towards his bathroom. 

 

True to his word, thirty minutes later, the crew was piled in Rich’s car, traveling towards the city. 

 

“So Jeremy,” Rich called out, looking through the rear view mirror at his friend in the back seat. “Brooke tells us Michael is pretty good in the sack. And honestly, I’m more hurt that I had to go through her to find out information on your sex life. What the hell, dude?”

 

Jeremy blushed and rolled his eyes. “Brooke! Why did you spill?” he asked, sitting up to put his hands on the passenger seat where the blonde sat. 

 

“I didn’t know it was a secret!” Brooke countered back, hands up in defense. 

 

“Jeremy, you’re caught. We want deats,” Rich continued, eyes moving quickly from Jeremy to the freeway. 

 

The brunette groaned. “You guys get on my ass when I’m not getting laid, and then when I am, you’re still nagging me. There’s no winning.”

 

“Trust me, we’re not the ones on your ass,” Rich retorted, receiving a lighthearted slap on the shoulder from Christine. “We’re your best friends. We deserve this.”

 

Jeremy snorted. “It’s good. He’s good.”

 

“Did you hear that? ‘It’s good.’,” Christine mocked teasingly. 

 

“Fine, fine. You won’t tell us right now, that’s fine. But I’ll get it out of you eventually,” Rich winked.

 

Jeremy rolled his eyes and tried to count how many more minutes he’d have to sit in this torture. 

 

_______________

 

“We should go ice skating!” Brooke suggested. 

 

The group had finally found parking in the bustling city and were huddled together as they walked down the streets crowded with tourists and locals.

 

“Yeah, if you want to wait in line for two hours,” Christine rejected as they walked. 

 

“We could sit in the park and smoke pot,” Rich threw in his two cents, to a staggering amount of disapproval from his friends. 

 

“Can we get lunch? I’m starving,” Jeremy piped in.

 

Surprisingly, that was something they all could agree on. Which brought them to shoving themselves in a small booth at a busy restaurant in Hell’s Kitchen, not minding the heat the crowds gave off. 

 

“This was a fantastic idea, my buddy. Nice,” Rich said as he eyed the menu hungrily. 

 

“I am full of good ideas on occasion,” Jeremy joked back, sipping on his water nonchalantly. 

 

After the waitress came to take their orders, the conversation shifted to one of Rich’s five minute rants about semi-trucks in the fastlane. Jeremy let himself fall back into the booth, mind drifting away from the loud tone of his friends’ voices and picking at their appetizer. 

 

Whenever Jeremy got into any kind of relationship, he tended to consume himself with it. He wasn’t proud of it, and he sure had tried to change it every new relationship he found himself in. It just was something that Jeremy had learned to accept about himself, even if he disliked it. 

 

This pattern had unsurprisingly followed him to now, mind completely dominated by thoughts of Michael. The only times he was really present in the moment was either at work, with too much on his plate to distract him, or when he was actually with Michael. 

 

God, the thought made him sick.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” Jeremy spoke suddenly, a stomachache fastly approaching. He jerked up and walked briskly away before any of his friends could question him. He maneuvered around tables and chairs until he found himself at the door. Turning the handle roughly, he realized with dismay that it was a single. Groaning under his breath, he leaned against the wall, pulling out his phone to distract himself as he waited. 

 

“Mr. Heere?”

 

Jeremy turned his head and almost threw up. “Oh my gosh, hello!” he sputtered out, hands in front of him haphazardly. 

 

Emmy’s mom pulled a stray piece of her straight auburn hair behind her ear. “Are you in line for the bathroom, too?”

 

“Uh, yeah,” Jeremy responded awkwardly, nodding his head towards the closed door. “There’s only one stall.”

 

“Oh,” she responded, joining him on the wall. “What are you doing here?” she asked without a smile or frown. Jeremy didn’t know if she was angry or surprised he was there. 

 

“Um, my friends and I decided to come to the city for the day,” Jeremy stammered.

 

“Oh, nice.”

 

Jeremy wished more than anything that the bathroom would open up soon. 

 

“It’s actually kind of crazy I saw you here,” she spoke up again, head looking at her boots. “I was gonna call you about something.”

 

Jeremy’s stomach ache prevailed. He was too nervous to reply. 

 

“Listen, Michael told me last week about you two.”  _ Oh God. Please kill me. I’ll take anything _ . Jeremy couldn’t look up; he was too horrified. 

 

She moved closer, both of their eyes fixated on the ground. “I was so angry when he told me. I thought about calling you right when I found out, to give you a piece of my mind. But I decided to be rational, for once,” she chuckled curtly. “I’m not mad at you. Or Michael. I...I guess I understand. It was unfair for me to think he would just stay single forever.”

 

Jeremy must have gotten stabbed by a steak knife, or fallen and cracked his head open, because he was sure he had died and gone to hell. He swallowed loudly, and moved his eyes to his companion’s fidgety, perfectly manicured hands. 

 

“You guys didn’t tell Emmy about any of this, right?” She moved her eyes to his. If Jeremy thought eye contact with Michael was difficult, this was on a whole other playing field. 

 

He shook his head violently. “No, no. Of course not. Not until we are for sure okay with what’s gonna happen. I would...would never do that.”

 

She licked her lips, digesting his words. “Okay. Good. Thank you,” she replied finally. 

 

Jeremy nodded slowly and clicked his tongue.  _ That person in the bathroom better by dying.  _ “I’m sorry,” he spilled out, not really knowing how else to fill the silence. 

 

“Don’t be. I understand. He’s pretty, great, isn’t he?” she smiled sadly, lips pursed. She moved her body to face him, Jeremy’s head following suit cautiously. “Let’s just agree to keep this cordial. For Emmy’s sake, especially.” 

 

Jeremy continued his pattern of nodding in agreement. “Okay.” The heavenly sound of a toilet flushing rang in his ears. Nothing had ever sounded so melodious in his life. 

 

“Okay.” 

 

The door opened, and Jeremy ran inside. 

 

____________________________________

 

Jeremy knocked with a gloved hand on Michael’s door. He shivered slightly in the nighttime cold, looking down at the festive lights sprinked down the houses in the neighborhood. He couldn’t help but smile at the melty indentation of what had to have been Emmy’s body making snow angels in the mush earlier that day. 

 

The door creaked open to a wide eyed, sock-clad Michael, grinning as he looked over the much more layered Jeremy. “Hi,” he greeted, licking his lips quickly. 

 

“You gonna invite me inside or leave me to freeze?” Jeremy smiled, stepping closer to Michael and pushing his way inside. 

 

Two days ago, Michael had told Jeremy that his parents were taking Emmy for the night, leaving the evening wide open for plans. Jeremy was never the most patient man, and the past 48 hours had gone by excruciatingly slow. But now, they could spend time celebrating the holiday, if not a few days (or weeks, in Jeremy’s case) late. 

 

“I brought you something,” Jeremy said as he inhaled the scent of pine from the Christmas tree. He held out the small bag in front of Michael.

 

“I thought you didn’t celebrate Christmas,” Michael retorted teasingly, taking the bag from him and plopping down on the couch. Jeremy quickly joined him, slipping off his boats and coat. 

 

“You got me something! I couldn’t just not repay the favor,” Jeremy reasoned. “Now open it.”

 

Michael obeyed, silently tearing apart the fragile tissue paper and uncovering what laid underneath. It was a photo frame, filled with a picture of Michael and Emmy. It was taken at the Halloween party; Michael had Emmy on his lap, looking at her adoringly while Emmy made her best scary face at the camera. Jeremy had found it on the school’s Facebook page and had saved it immediately. 

 

“I know it’s not much, but I thought you might like a fresh, new picture,” Jeremy explained, straying away from saying anything negative about the other picture that still laid on the kitchen counter. 

 

Michael stared at it intently, eyes full of emotion. “Jeremy, this is so great. Thank you,” he said, gazing at a blushing Jeremy with his mouth turned up into a smile. 

 

“I mean, it’s no Mario Kart,” Jeremy looked away, uncomfortable with the compliment. 

 

“No, Jeremy, really. I love it. Thank you,” Michael said earnestly. He pulled Jeremy’s head over with his empty hand and kissed him softly. 

 

Jeremy smiled into the kiss, effectively breaking it. “Okay, so you said you had activities planned?” he asked with a smirk.

 

Michael laughed. “This is an activity,” he spoke and brought Jeremy’s lips to his again. 

 

Jeremy kissed him back for a few moments, before pulling back with a laugh and standing up. “Is that...is that Dreidel?” he asked in disbelief, looking at the familiar game pieces laying stagnant on the table. The wood was vibrant, and obviously a new game. 

 

“Well, yeah,” Michael nodded sheepishly, joining Jeremy at the dining room table. “I didn’t realize it was so hard to find one of these games.”

 

“Did you buy this for me?” Jeremy asked, mouth still agape in surprise. He ran his fingers against the spinning top. 

 

Michael nodded again. “Will you teach me how to play?”

 

Jeremy stood back up and nodded, hugging the darker man tightly. “This is the coolest thing a boyfriend has done for me, like ever,” he spoke without thinking, pulling out the embrace and looking at the game adoringly. 

 

“Boyfriend?” Michael asked tentatively. 

 

Jeremy felt the blood rush to his face, eyes widening in horror.  _ Fuck.  _ Why did he say that? He knew they weren’t boyfriends. They hadn’t even talked about  _ what  _ they were exactly, yet. And here he was, fucking it up, per usual. The universe: 1. Jeremy Heere: 0. 

 

“Fuck. No. I didn’t mean that. Shit. I-I’m sorry,” Jeremy stuttered with worry in his face. “I’ll just go.”

 

Michael laughed at him. “Wait. God, you’re so dramatic,” he rolled his eyes teasingly. “Do you want to be boyfriends?”

 

Jeremy stared back at him without decision. “Maybe. I mean, if you wanted to, I’d be down,” Jeremy tried playing nonchalantly. 

 

“Oh my god, are you trying to kill me here?” Michael laughed, but Jeremy could tell he was nervous. “I would like that very much, actually.”

 

Jeremy’s heart fluttered and tried not to smile as widely as he wanted to. “To be boyfriends?” he asked for reassurance. 

 

Michael nodded. 

 

“Okay. Me, too,” Jeremy agreed with a nod. 

 

“Cool,” Michael said, stepping closer to Jeremy and wrapping his hands around his waist, rubbing softly at his clothed skin. “Michael and Jeremy; boyfriends,” he whispered with a smile, face creeping closer to Jeremy’s. “I like the sound of that.”

 

Jeremy put his arms around his broad shoulders, meeting Michael’s face in the middle. “I think it would sound better as Jeremy and Michael,” he teased against Michael’s lips, the cool plastic of his glasses pressing against his pale cheek. 

 

“Shut up,” Michael closed the small gap, deeply passionate kisses attacking Jeremy. Jeremy smiled, opening up his mouth for Michael to explore with his tongue. Jeremy licked against his bottom lip, earning a small groan from his boyfriend.  _ Boyfriend.  _

 

Michael pushed their lower halves together, the sudden friction making Jeremy whimper. God, it had been so long since they’d had each other. Jeremy pressed tighter, snaking a hand down to Michael’s groin and palming him through his sweats. 

 

“I thought we were gonna play Dreidel?” Michael asked with a gasp against the side of Jeremy’s mouth. 

 

“This is the other part of your Christmas gift,” Jeremy said. “Didn’t you say you wanted me for Christmas, Mariah?” 

 

Michael groaned and dragged him towards the bedroom.

 

______________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> criticize me down below kiddos


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go

Jeremy kept the heavy classroom door open with his weight, waving goodbye to his students for the break. Clad in a Dollar Store Santa hat with his trousers raised to show off his equally as festive socks, he said his quick goodbyes to his students. 

 

“Bye, boys and girls! Have a wonderful break!” he yelled out over the chatter and rustling of backpacks. He looked over the quickly degrenegading crop of his students to see his favorite one skipping over. 

 

“How was school, squirt?” Jeremy asked once Emmy arrived next to him, tugging on a pigtail lightly. 

 

Emmy scrunched up her nose in disgust, swatting away Jeremy’s hand. “It was fine. But we didn’t get to have our holiday party until we did math homework. Second grade is  _ so  _ not fun,” Emmy groaned, sludging into Jeremy’s classroom. 

 

It had been a little over a year since Jeremy and Michael had started dating, and it’s had its share of ups and downs. They waited to tell Emmy until spring break, and she took it surprisingly well, much to anxious Jeremy’s instant relief. 

 

_ “So you’re not upset?” Jeremy asked, bracing himself for the wrathful tantrum of a newly minted seven-year-old.  _

 

_ Him, Michael, and Emmy all sat around the Mell’s small dining room table, hands clasped in front of them and faces cautious. Emmy had just been dropped off by her mother, and was taking in the information that her father was now dating her teacher. Jeremy was expecting the worst; a complete crying fest, Michael would take Emmy’s side (obviously. Jeremy probably would, too), and Jeremy would leave without a boyfriend and with a broken heart.  _

 

_ “I mean...it’s super weird. But I’m not angry,” Emmy started, playing with the cheap sparkly nail polish on her small fingers.  _

 

_ “Really?” Jeremy spoke in a high voice, a little too excitable. Michael gave him a quick look. _

 

_ “Listen, Emmy, I know this is a lot, but if you have any questions, you can always ask me,” Michael took one of her hands in his, the size contrast almost comedic.  _

 

_ “I don’t have to tell anyone at school, right?” Emmy inquired with a frown. She pulled back her hands into her lap.  _

 

_ “No,” Michael answered, Jeremy too red to even move. “We won’t tell anyone at school either if it makes you uncomfortable.” Jeremy nodded in agreement, trying not to let Emmy’s plead for secrecy nag him too much. _

 

_ Emmy adjusted her weight in the chair, swinging her legs underneath the table. She clicked her tongue, nodding slowly. “Okay. That would okay, then.” _

 

It had taken time to adjust. After the initial declaration, Emmy had been a little standoffish, and understandably so. Jeremy tried not to let her hostility bug him; after all, it could have gone a lot worse. He could handle her not volunteering to do addition problems on the board or her silent hellos and goodbyes during the day. He didn’t visit the Mell house often afterwards, too ashamed and awkward at the face that he might have completely ruined Emmy’s life. 

 

Michael assured him countless times, as Emmy slowly began to open back up to him. Looking back, Jeremy could admit he was a little dramatic. But the uncertain nature of the whole situation had him worried beyond belief. He almost didn’t give himself a chance to be a part of their lives; he didn’t want to have to give it up. 

 

Once summer had passed and Emmy became distracted with a new teacher and the challenges second grade brought, she was much more warm towards Jeremy. They were back to their playful relationship, and Jeremy was more than ecstatic. It was still an uphill hurdle, for both of them to open themselves up to new people. But it was getting better. 

 

“It’ll only get worse from here, kiddo,” Jeremy replied, closing the door and joining Emmy in the now empty classroom. 

 

“Is there anymore hot choco-,” Emmy couldn’t finish her sentence before Jeremy gave her a cup he had saved, her eyes widening dramatically at the sugary beverage. She quickly took it from his hands, gulping it down as quickly as she could. 

 

“Easy there,” Jeremy warned lightly, stopping at his desk to shut down his computer and grab his bag full of ungraded papers. “You ready to go home?”

 

“Christmas break!!” Emmy exclaimed, throwing the hand not holding her drink in the air victoriously.

 

Jeremy laughed, took a final look at his classroom, and locked the door behind them. 

 

“Hey, Mr. Heere!” Both brunette heads turned around to see Rich jogging over to them. “You heading out already? Someone’s anxious for vacation,” Rich raised his eyebrows, signature smirk plastered on his face. “Hey Emmy, what’s up?” he balanced himself into a squat, giving the girl a high-five. 

 

Jeremy rolled his eyes. “I packed up everything yesterday, just so I wouldn’t be stuck here for longer than I needed to. Unlike you, obviously.” 

 

“Oooh! Burn!” Emmy laughed, sticking out her tongue at the shorter teacher. 

 

“Ouch, Emmy. I thought we were homies! How could you take his side over mine?” Rich acted hurt, placing a hand on his chest theatrically. 

 

“Well we were  _ trying _ to go home and celebrate Christmas break, but you had to come over here and distract us,” Emmy explained like it was obvious, rolling her eyes and placing her hand up towards Rich’s face. “Now talk to the hand.”

 

Rich tried not to smile and stood up, hand still on his chest. “Wow, Emmy. I see how it is,” he gave Jeremy a look. “Well you two best buds have fun over break. Merry Hanukkah, or whatever,” he winked and started to walk back to his own classroom. 

 

“Hey, Mr. Heere? I mean, Jeremy,” Emmy started. Her confusion over what to call him had also been a process. At school, she definitely preferred to call him Mr. Heere like her peers. Whenever Jeremy would visit the Mell’s at their home (which was often), she would try to stick to Jeremy. Again, it was just another challenge that Jeremy could definitely handle. 

 

“Yeah, Emmy?” Jeremy replied, digging out his keys and unlocking the car. The pair each took their respective seats; Jeremy in the driver’s seat and Emmy in the back, directly diagonal from him. 

 

“When I get to fifth grade, can I have Mr. Goranski as my teacher?” Emmy asked, shoving her pink backpack next to her and buckling up. “I mean, since you’re a teacher here, you can make that happen, right?”

 

Jeremy chuckled until his breath, starting up the car. “I thought you didn’t like Mr. Goranski?”

 

Emmy stayed silent for a moment. “He’s okay. And you didn’t answer my question!”

 

Jeremy laughed as he pulled out of the lot behind the buses. “Yeah. I’ll make it happen.”

 

“Also, can you put on-”

 

“One step ahead of you,” Jeremy cut her off, pushing the  _ Moana  _ CD in the stereo, savoring the daily occurrence of Emmy’s boisterous voice singing along with her favorite princess. 

 

__________________

 

“This is it.”

 

Jeremy sat in the passenger seat on his father’s car, which had just stopped at the curb of the Mell residence. He had invited his father to celebrate Christmas with them, which he had gladly accepted (even if he didn’t really celebrate the holiday). 

 

“I can’t believe I haven’t been to your boyfriend’s house and you’ve been dating for over a year,” Mr. Heere said, taking the keys from the ignition. “It’s a nice house.”

 

“Dad, please don’t be weird. I’m begging you,” Jeremy turned to the driver with sincere eyes. 

 

“Me? Weird? Never!” came his reply. 

 

Jeremy scowled at him sternly.

 

“Okay, okay, fine. I won’t say anything embarrassing about your childhood, or touch anything in the kitchen, or make Emmy uncomfortable,” Mr. Heere sighed, reciting his lines that Jeremy had drilled into him on the drive over. 

 

“Good. Just stick to the script,” Jeremy reminded anxiously, stepping out of the car to grab the gifts he had for Michael and Emmy. 

Hands full of presents, the Heere’s made their way blindly to the Mell’s front door. Jeremy could hear Emmy’s excited squeals and the low rumble of Michael’s laugh, and proceeded to kick the door lightly for a knock.

 

“I’ll get it!” he could hear Michael yell as footsteps came closer. 

 

Jeremy smiled brightly as the door opened. “Merry Christmas!”  he exclaimed, popping his head out from the stack of wrapped boxes.

 

“Merry Christmas! Come on in!” Michael repeated just as excitedly, taking the gifs from Jeremy’s hands and putting on the counter. The Heere’s followed inside, seeing the festive hurricane of wrapping paper and Christmas lights strewn across the living room, with Emmy sitting smack in the middle, desperately trying to open a new doll. 

 

“Jeremy! Look what I got from Santa!” Emmy held up her American Girl doll, still in its container. 

 

“Wow, that is awesome! Guess you were on the nice list this year,” Jeremy winked, joining Michael behind the counter. 

 

“It’s good to see you again, Mr. Heere,” Michael said holding out his arm for a shake. 

 

“Oh, come on Michael. Us Heere’s don’t shake. Bring it in,” the taller man all but snatched Michael into his arms for a hug. Jeremy looked on with complete mortification painting his face. He opened his eyes wide, silently begging his dad to let him go. 

 

Michael laughed, pulling out of the embrace. 

 

“After all, I am the reason you guys got together in the first place,” Mr. Heere continued with a chuckle. 

 

“It’s true,” Michael added, snaking an arm around Jeremy’s waist comfortably. “Because someone over here wouldn’t help me out when I had nowhere else to go. Truly heartless,” he shook his head teasingly at his boyfriend. 

 

Jeremy rolled his eyes and leaned into the warmth of Michael’s chest. “Please don’t take my dad’s side on this. He already can’t stop talking about you regardless.”

 

“Can’t help it that we’re best friends now, Jeremy,” his father replied, holding up a hand for a high-five which Michael enthusiastically gave. 

 

“Hey Emmy, wanna open presents?” Jeremy yelled out from the kitchen, twisting out of Michael’s grip and joining her in the living room.

 

“Yeah!” Emmy replied with an excited clap.

 

“Oh, come on, Jer,” Michael groaned, trudging to join the others.

  
  


Twenty minutes later, the carpet was completely covered in boxes, cheesy wrapping paper, and tape. Classic Christmas carols rang through softly on the speaker as Emmy opened up the final gift of the day, courtesy of Jeremy’s dad. 

 

“What is it, Emmy?” Michael asked. He and Jeremy were seated on the couch. Michael laid an arm around his boyfriend while Jeremy nuzzled into his side. 

 

“It’s a...football?” Emmy replied confusedly, holding up the ball in a small hand. The leather material was painted a glittery pink.

 

“Jeremy told me that sometimes you watch the game with them on Sundays. Me and Jeremy used to play catch together when he was your age. And I know pink is your favorite color, so…” Mr. Heere trailed off from his spot on the barstool, his early excitement about giving Emmy his gift now fading at her bewildered expression. 

 

Michael and Jeremy shared an awkward glance before the former began to pipe up. “Emmy-”

 

“Cool! Can we play with it now?” Emmy asked, examining the ball carefully. 

 

“Uh...yeah! Yep,” the bearded man stammered, obviously surprised at Emmy’s curious response. 

 

“Go put on your coat and boots,” Michael nodded, and Emmy was up running to her room in seconds. 

 

__________________________

 

“It looks like they’re having fun out there,” Jeremy noted as he poured himself more coffee, looking out into the front yard through the window. From what he could see, his dad was trying and failing to teach the young girl proper form in her throw. Emmy would just giggle and toss it haphazardly across the icy lawn. 

 

“I was a little nervous when she opened it, but I guess she’s into it,” Michael replied in disbelief from his spot on the couch. The bright silly noises of childish Christmas songs had transitioned to Michael Buble’s crooning voice and soft jazz. 

 

“Good. I thought my dad was gonna start crying if she didn’t like it,” Jeremy scoffed, curling himself back up against Michael’s side. “Thanks for inviting us, by the way. Dad was really excited about it,” he leaned his head against Michael’s shoulder, kissing over his sweater chastely. 

  
  


Michael hummed. “I’m glad you guys could make it. I know it’s not exactly your holiday,” he said, wrapping a tight arm around Jeremy and kissing his head. 

 

“Hey, what’s yours is mine. Plus, I’ve wanted to celebrate. The present thing is a cool bonus,”   
Jeremy responded, looking up at Michael with a grin. 

 

“I knew it. You’re only dating me for the Christmas gifts,” Michael deadpanned. 

 

“You caught me,” Jeremy answered, leaning up to kiss him. 

 

Michael responded by placing a hand against a pale cheek, turning his head slightly and deepening the kiss. Jeremy hummed in delight, running his tongue across Michael’s bottom lip. The latter quickly complied, running his own tongue across the roof of Jeremy’s mouth. Jeremy took the hand that wasn’t holding his mug and ran it through those familiar dark locks, tugging softly, just the way he knew Michael liked. 

 

“You’re killing me here,” Michael groaned against his mouth, stopping to place a chaste kiss against his jaw. 

 

Jeremy smiled widely, too happy to be bothered by Michael’s comment. “Sorry. I can’t help myself.”

 

He laughed as Michael groaned and rolled his head back. “Tease.” Still, he leaned back down to kiss the smirk off of his boyfriend’s gleaming face. Jeremy pressed back passionately, scooting impossibly closer to Michael’s side. “You should stay over tonight,” Michael murmured, sticking his forehead against Jeremy’s.

 

“I have to drive my dad back,” Jeremy sighed, pulling back to lean against Michael’s collarbone. “Plus I don’t wanna intrude on you and Emmy’s favorite tradition.”

 

Michael had shared that he and Emmy would always spend their Christmases in pajamas, eating junk food and watching their favorite holiday movies. He had talked about the tradition so brightly to Jeremy, eyes lit up in happy nostalgia, that Jeremy didn’t want to ruin. He would rather not taint what was so special to the two of them. 

 

Michael clicked his tongue, looking at Jeremy with sad eyes. “Aww, babe. You wouldn’t intrude, I promise. We’ll wait up for you.”

 

“We’ll see,” Jeremy grumbled, moving his head to look at Michael. “Now kiss me.”

 

“So bossy,” Michael tsked, lowering his mouth to Jeremy’s.

 

______________________

 

Jeremy squinted as his navigated the dark, icy roads, chastising himself for living in a place with a real winter. His dad sat next to him, ruffling through old CDs in the glove compartment. Pink Floyd spilled through the speakers, creating a nostalgic atmosphere for the father and son. 

 

“I had lots of fun today, pal. Thanks for letting me come,”  Mr. Heere broke the silence, head still down and gazing over cracked discs. 

 

Jeremy’s heart soared. “No problem, Dad. Emmy really liked the gift you gave her.”

 

“Really? Because I wasn’t really sure what to get her, because what do seven year old girls even like? Lord knows I’ve never had to decide that before. But you said she liked watching the games with you, and I found that pink one and I thought it would be good,” the older man rambled anxiously. 

 

“Dad, chill,” Jeremy chuckled, briefly taking his eyes off the road to give his father a reassuring glance. “From what I could tell with your two hours in the front yard, she liked it.”

 

“Okay. That’s what I thought, too,” the other answered quickly. 

 

Jeremy’s phone began to vibrate against the middle console, brightening up the dark vehicle. Both of the Heere’s looked down at the caller. 

 

“Want me to answer it? I can put it on speaker,” Jeremy’s dad asked, already taking the phone into a big, calloused hand. At Jeremy’s nod, he slid it open.

 

“Hey,” Jeremy greeted, ready for the familiar voice of his boyfriend to flood the car. 

 

“Jeremy?” a small voice spoke out. 

 

“Emmy? Where’s your dad?” Jeremy questioned, eyebrows raised in confusion. 

 

“He’s in the shower. Daddy just told me you’re not gonna come watch movies with us and eat candy. I was gonna share my peppermint bark with you,” Emmy explained in a saddened tone. 

 

“O-oh,” Jeremy stammered, trying not to let the sweet way her voice and words have an effect on him. It was a failed effort. “I thought that was something that you and your Daddy did together?”

 

“Well, yeah, but we want you to come, too,” Emmy answered matter-of-factly. 

 

“Hey, Emmy? It’s Jeremy’s dad,” Jeremy looked over at his completely calm companion. “Jeremy will be over very soon. He’s just dropping me off and he is honored that you will share your peppermint bark with him.”

 

Jeremy’s eyes widened and he looked at his dad.  _ What the hell?  _ He mouthed. He got a smirk and shrug in response. 

 

“Okay, awesome! How long?” Emmy inquired.

 

Jeremy kept in a groan. “Give me about two hours.”

 

“That’s a really long time,” Emmy complained. “Can it be faster?”

 

“I’ll try my best,” Jeremy said.

 

“Okay. See you soon!” Emmy exclaimed. “Bye, Jeremy’s dad!”

 

“Bye!” both men said in unison and closed out of the call. 

 

“What did you just do?!” Jeremy screeched. 

 

“Oh come on, Jeremy. You’re practically part of the family already. Stop pussying out and accept it.”

Jeremy tried not to blush at his dad’s harsh word choice. He gave a undistinguishable noise in reply. 

 

“Those two adore the hell out of you. Now stop being a baby and make some memories,” Mr. Heere said, just as Jeremy began turning into his childhood neighborhood. 

 

Jeremy didn’t reply, pulling into the driveway.

 

“She’s a good kid. You did well, son,” his father added slowly with a slight nod as his son put the car in park.

 

“Thanks, Dad. I think I’m gonna keep them.”

 

_______________________

  
  


Jeremy sighed and gazed at himself in the mirror. He had rushed over to Michael’s right after he dropped off his dad. Emmy had proceeded to call him two more times, wondering impatiently when he would be arriving. Which led him to this moment, in some of Michael’s old comfy clothes because he didn’t have time to go home and change for their pajama party.

 

He didn’t know if Michael had lost weight before he met him, but Jeremy felt swallowed up in his tattered red hoodie and sweatpants, He buried his nose in his shoulder, inhaling the familiar scent of Michael’s laundry detergent. So what if he looked like a homeless dwarf; if he got to be surrounded by Michael and his smell, he could deal. 

 

He opened the door from the bathroom and padded his way back to his company. Michael and Emmy were sprawled on the living room couch, covered in mismatched blankets and pillows. The TV was lit with the menu screen of  _ It’s a Wonderful Life _ , and the only lights were the ones reflecting off of the Christmas tree. 

 

“You look silly,” Emmy giggled from Michael’s lap.

 

Jeremy dropped his jaw in faux hurt. “I thought I looked rather dashing,” he teased back, joining them on the cushiony seat. He glanced at a silent Michael, who eyed him up and down hungrily. Jeremy didn’t know if his darkened pupils were from the lights or something else entirely. 

 

Emmy pressed play, and the trio fell into a comfortable silence. As the movie progressed, Jeremy felt himself slowly transition from his ramrod straight position next to the father-daughter duo to curling up to Michael’s side, head heavy on his shoulder and hand gently caressing his forearm. Michael had one arm around Emmy in his lap and one embracing Jeremy, stopping occasionally to play with the hair and the nape of his neck. 

 

About an hour in, Jeremy could hear soft, even breathing coming from in front of him. He moved his sleepy head to stare down at Emmy, who was slumped against Michael, completely passed out. He looked back up at Michael. He could see the film reflecting through his glasses. 

 

“Looks like someone is pooped,” he whispered up in his ear. Michael looked down to see for himself. 

 

Full lips carved into a smile at the sight. “I should go put her in her bed,” Michael responded back quietly, adjusting his position so he could stand. 

 

“Can I do it?” Jeremy asked before he could filter himself, slightly saddened by the end of his comfortable reverie. 

 

Michael blinked at him quickly. “Uh, yeah. Sure. I’ll clean up in here.”

 

Jeremy nodded and grabbed Emmy’s limp limbs, balancing her sleepy weight on his chest. He carried her over to her room, which in the dark looked quite the contrast from the bright pale blue walls and butterfly stickers that usually adorned in in sunlight. Jeremy stooped down to lower her into her twin bed, smiling slightly as he looked over her sleeping form. Her brown hair was even more messy than usual, sticking up in strange places as she curled herself up in the comforter. 

 

Just as he was about to walk away, he heard a tiny voice speak up. “Jeremy?” Emmy asked in a hoarse tone.

 

“Yeah, Emmy?” he whispered back. 

 

“I’m happy you came today.”

 

Jeremy felt his heart burst, right then and there. “Yeah. Me, too.”

 

She smiled as she closed her half lidded eyes again, falling back into dreamland. 

Jeremy silently tiptoed out and closed the door quietly, seeing Michael finishing the folding of the copious blankets that had been using. 

 

“Need some help?”

 

Michael shook his head from his spot on the couch and patted his lap. “C’mere,” he spoke softly.

 

Jeremy obeyed nervously, feeling his stomach fill up with those familiar, excitable butterflies. He sat facing his boyfriend, legs wrapped around his torso. He moved closer and wrapped his arms around Michael’s shoulders. “Hi,” he whispered, face inches away from Michael’s. 

 

Michael responded by crashing their mouths together, one hand snaking around to grip his waist while the other took a handful of his ass, pressing their groins together. Jeremy moaned at the sudden movement, allowing Michael’s tongue to slide into his mouth. The paler man could already feel Michael’s hard on through the thin layers of pajama pants, causing his own dick to twitch in interested response. 

 

“Someone’s eager,” Jeremy gasped quietly against his lips, licking a stripe across his bottom lip and biting softly. 

 

“I’ve been hard ever since you came out wearing my clothes. Fuck, you don’t even know what that does to me,” Michael growled, bucking his hips up against Jeremy’s and squeezing his ass tightly. “I couldn’t wait for Emmy to fall asleep. You’re such a tease, baby.”

 

Jeremy tried to hold in a whimper, grinding back down on his love. “Fuck, Michael. We should take this to your room,” he spoke out as Michael’s mouth made quick work on sucking a mark onto the side of his jaw, right below his ear, knowing the exact place to make Jeremy crumble. 

 

Michael pushed him off quickly and grabbed his hand, practically running to his bedroom. Jeremy followed behind, trying desperately to shuck off his socks with one hand. As soon as they entered, Michael closed the door softly while Jeremy got on the bed ad shimmied out of his sweats and boxers. He was just about to throw the hoodie off as well until Michael’s hands stopped him, hovering over him on the bed. 

 

“Keep it on,” Michael ordered, pushing Jeremy down on his back, running his hands under the heavy fabric and up Jeremy’s sides. 

Jeremy sighed, crashing their faces together and moving his own hands down to push off Michael’s pajama pants. He twisted his hand around to grip Michael’s already hard cock, head dripping with precome. 

 

Michael moaned, dropping his head on Jeremy’s shoulder, his arms shaky with his weight. Jeremy continued to pump him in slow, tight strokes. He started at the base and twisted his hand on the head, thumb swiping across the mess of precome building up. Both men let out mixes of pants and sighs, loving the feeling of being together again. 

 

Suddenly, Michael pulled Jeremy’s hand away, making his way down Jeremy’s clothed torso and down to his naked lower half. He kissed up his leg, starting from his calf, up to his knee and back down again, making circular motions on his hip. Jeremy groaned, feeling his cock hardening even more at the sight of Michael below him. 

 

“Take off your shirt, please,” Jeremy gasped, keeping his hands still at his sides by grasping the bed sheets. 

 

Michael listened, tossing it aside so that he was bare, and continued his mouth’s assault on Jeremy’s legs. Jeremy groaned in frustration, wanting to take in the beauty of Michael’s chest. He couldn’t think about that for long though; not when Michael’s head had gotten increasingly closer to his dick, mouth leaving tantalizing kisses on his thighs. 

 

“Michael,” he pleaded, threading his fingers through his dark locks. 

 

“Yeah, baby?” Michael murmured against his skin, the vibrations heading straight to Jeremy’s cock.

 

Jeremy rolled his eyes, knowing exactly where Michael was going with his teasing. “I hate you,” he replied in a breathy voice. 

 

Michael took a nip at the junction between his thigh and hip, a hand reaching up under the hoodie to caress his stomach. “I love you,” he retorted back.

 

Jeremy flushed. Even months after they had first said those three scary words to each other, it still made him feel giddy hearing it slide off of Michael’s talented tongue. Each time felt like the first.

 

Michael granted him mercy, finally planting a kiss to Jeremy’s swollen tip. Jeremy sighed quietly in relief, hands gravitating between the sheets and Michael’s mane. Michael licked a stripe along the length of it. “

 

You’re so perfect. So pretty for me,” Michael said. Jeremy wasn’t given time to respond before Michael took him in his mouth, swallowing around him as he inched up his dick. Jeremy couldn’t help but let out a pathetic whimper, cheek buried in the pillow as he tried to stay still. 

 

Michael took one hand to roll his balls softly, breathing heavily through his nose while he made his way to the base. Jeremy wanted to scream when he felt himself hit the back of Michael’s throat. “Oh my god,  _ Michael, _ ” he managed to squawk out, both hands cementing themselves in Michael's hair. 

 

Then Michael did something miraculous with his tongue in the  _ perfect  _ spot, and Jeremy couldn’t help but buck up into the hot, wet heat. “‘M sorry,” he stumbled, but Michael just hummed against his dick and adjusted. Jeremy placed a hand in his mouth to muffle the increasingly embarrassing sounds escaping his throat. 

 

Michael slowly took his mouth off of him, kissing the head sweetly. “I’m fucking you whether you come right now or not,” he said, kissing up his stomach slightly. “Take your pick, sweetheart.”

 

Jeremy pulled him up to his mouth, tasting himself on Michael’s tongue. “Fuck me. Now,” he answered, reaching over blindly to grab the lube and a condom, shoving them in Michael’s hand. He clawed desperately at Michael’s pajamas.

 

“Whatever you say, Jer,” Michael sat up to awkwardly maneuver the rest of his clothing off. Jeremy couldn’t help but let out a lame moan of  approval at Michael’s stiff dick, bouncing up slightly until his stomach. He was thicker than Jeremy, and he couldn’t wait to have it inside him again. 

 

“My eyes are up here,” Michael cut him from his dirty thoughts.

 

Jeremy reluctantly brought his eyes back to Michael’s face. His hair was mused from Jereremy’s consistant tugging, face flushed and eyes blown dark with lust. “I can’t help it. You’re so fucking hot.” Jeremy looked at him with half lidded eyes as he spread his legs.

 

Michael groaned as he spread some lube on his fingers. “Fuck Jer, if you keep that up, this show might be over way too soon.” He leaned back over and hovered a finger over Jeremy’s hole. “You ready, baby,” he said more gently, lips caressing his jaw. 

 

Jeremy nodded, closing his eyes as he adjusted to the first digit. Michael continued busying himself on Jeremy’s upper neck, running his tongue over harsh bites, not deep enough to bruise. After a few moments, Jeremy bucked up, signalling for a second finger. As Michael pulled out quickly, Jeremy switched their positions, straddling Michael with spread legs. “I wanna ride you,” Jeremy explained as Michael’s cocked eyebrow. 

 

Michael kissed him deeply, scissoring his fingers as he stretched Jeremy out. Jeremy clawed at Michael’s back with short nails, grinding down on the wonderful friction. “Another,” he gasped out against Michael’s lips, kissing him again as Michael filled him up even further. “Oh,  _ fuck,  _ yes,” Jeremy panted out, legs struggling to stay up on Michael’s sides. 

 

“You look so good like this, in my clothes,” Michael murmured out. Even with closed eyes, Jeremy could feel his hot gaze on his body. “I love how you let go for me. I’m the only one who gets to see you like this.”

 

Jeremy nodded frantically, gasping as his fingers brushed across his prostate. “Yes, Michael, just you,” he whispered, head lolling back at the immense pleasure. 

 

Michael kissed his exposed neck. “You ready for me, Jer?”

 

Jeremy could only nod in response, the mix of his favorite nickname and his fingers taking up too much of his brain. He reluctantly opened his eyes, grabbing Michael’s cock and after little struggle, unwrapped the condom and slipped it on. He pumped it quickly, grabbing the lube and spreading it. Michael sighed, falling back against the headboard while Jeremy stroked and lined him up against his ass. Jeremy gripped his shoulders tightly and shakily took him in, both of them moaning at the contact. 

 

“Shit, Jer,” Michael groaned. 

 

“Shut up,” Jeremy kissed him. “You gotta stay quiet.”

 

“Look who’s talking,” Michael retorted back in a whisper. “I already know how to make you  _ scream _ , baby.”

 

Jeremy couldn’t tease back, too consumed with the full feeling Michael’s cock was giving him as he adjusted. He kissed him again, crashing their mouths together and sucking on his tongue as he bottomed out. He slowly rose back up, torturing Michael with the slow tension. Jeremy pulled his mouth away and fell back down on Michael’s dick, causing both of them to bite their hands to muffle the noises. Every time Jeremy repeated his movements, he got faster. 

 

“You’re so tight, baby. Feel so good. You’re so good,” Michael stammered, hands pressing roughly into his hips. 

 

Jeremy smirked and licked his lips. He was almost surprised by how much control he was keeping, seeing Michael fall apart underneath him. Until Michael moved up, directly hitting his most sensitive spot, and Jeremy was gone. “Oh, please don’t stop,” Jeremy whimpered burying his head in Michael’s sweaty shoulder. 

 

“Wasn’t planning on it,” Michael grinned, keeping his pleasurable, tormenting pace inside Jeremy. 

 

Jeremy panted and bite his hand. “Touch me, please,” he begged, pulling a hand away from his waist towards his leaking, aching dick. 

 

Michael obeyed, stroking him quickly as Jeremy’s grinding got sloppy and sloppier. “Wish I could keep you like this forever. I never want to stop fucking you. You’re so tight,  _ fuck _ ,” Michael continued to speak, only inching Jeremy closer to his climax. 

 

“Oh, Michael, I’m so close,” he let out. The combination of Michael’s hand on his cock, roughly jerking him just the way he knew he liked, Michael’s cock inside him, a constant press against his prostate, and his praise becoming too much. 

 

“Come for me, baby. Wanna see you let go,” Michael bucked up unrhythmically into Jeremy. With that, Jeremy sobbed out a whimper and spilled over Michael’s hand and his sweatshirt, tightening around Michael’s dick. 

 

The feeling of Jeremy’s already tight hole clenching around him was enough to make Michael let out a quiet sigh and a final buck inside him. Jeremy could feel him spill inside him, making his overstimulated cock twitch in exhausted interest. 

 

Jeremy pulled Michael out of him, falling over next to him. Both men laid back, shoulder to shoulder, gaining their breath again and coming down from their highs. Jeremy looked over, sweaty and red faced, with a smile. “Hi,” he said and kissed Michael’s broad shoulder. 

 

Michael grinned, reaching down to hold his hand and squeezed. “You should ride me more often,” he said, making Jeremy flush and bury his head in his shoulder. 

 

“We should get cleaned up,” Jeremy said after a few moments, not moving. 

 

“Yeah,” Michael agreed, neither of them moving. 

 

“Two minutes,” Jeremy snuggled up against Michael, throwing one his own pale legs between Michael’s tan ones. 

 

“Good idea,” Michael responded, bringing up their interlocked hands and kissing his knuckles. 

 

“Hey, Michael?”

 

“Yeah, Jer?”

 

“I’m really fucking happy,” Jeremy admitted, pulling up his face to look at Michael.

 

“Yeah? Me too,” Michael replied nuzzling their foreheads. 

 

It was another twenty minutes before the pair finally got up and took a shower. 

 

______________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's all folks!
> 
> thanks for every single one of your kudos, comments, and hits. 100% would not be here if it wasn't for your encouragement
> 
> until next time! <3

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading my trash


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